Absolutely Not

On this episode, Heather is back in LA and welcomes Atsuko Okatsuka to the pod. Heather has shown up to the recording dress in her last dusty Brooks and Dunn t-shirt, while Atsuko is in a full conductor designer outfit with a shrimp bolo tie. They debate whether or not they are brain rotting being on their phone all the time on tour, ridiculous personal Yelp reviews, and if it's better to have a bird in the hand or two in a bush. They also connect on their love of Lucille Ball. You can catch Atsuko on tour as well as her new Hulu special, Father. Episode Sponsors: Want to see more of our adventures, laughs, and post-round FRESCAMixed vibes? Follow @FrescaMixed on Instagram and YouTube for more.Find Kahlúa Dunkin Caramel Swirl at retailers nationwide, including Walmart, Total Wine, Albertsons, Kroger, Ralphs, Safeway, BevMo, Publix, and more. Must be 21 or older to purchase. Please drink responsibly.To explore coverage, visit ASPCApetinsuranc.com/absolutely. This is a Paid Advertisement. Insurance is underwritten by either Independence American Insurance Company or UnitedStates Fire Insurance Company, and produced by PTZ Insurance Agency, Limited. The ASPCA is not an insurer and is not engaged in the business of insurance.Find gifts so good you'll want to keep them with Quince. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.Join the loyalty program for renters at joinbilt.com/absolutely. Make sure to use our URL so they know we sent you.Goodwipes is giving away FREE wipes! Want to try a FREE pack of Goodwipes? Just buy a pack at Target, Walmart, Kroger — or your local store—then head to goodwipes.com/absolutely, text them your receipt and get reimbursed! Goodwipes —because butts deserve better.Get yourself and your loved ones the best gift of all - the gift of clean with Branch Basics! For a limited time only, our listeners get 15% off and Free Shipping on their premium starter pack when you use code ABSOLUTELY at BranchBasics.com/ABSOLUTELY. PLEASE support our show and tell them we sent you. Get Branch Basics this Holiday Season, because cleanliness matters.Produced by Dear Media.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 3 December 2025

On this episode replay from 2021, we're having a post-thanksgiving bitch fest because everyone has been forced into unwanted family-time and now we're all chain-smoking near the garage. IT'S A MESS. It's time to reboot bitches, and take some time for yourself-because if we don't, we won't make it out of the holiday's alive! Episode Sponsors: Shop my favorite pajamas at SKIMS.com. and if you’re looking for the perfect gifts for everyone on your list - the SKIMS Holiday Shop is now open at SKIMS.com Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. For Absolutely Not listeners, you can get 20% off your first order at curehydration.com/absolutely with code absolutely. You can get an additional 15% off their 90-day subscription Starter Kit by going to fatty15.com/ABSOLUTELY and using code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. Head over to Addyi’s website — Addyi.com — and see if Addyi is right for you. Find Kahlúa Dunkin Caramel Swirl at retailers nationwide, including Walmart, Total Wine, Albertsons, Kroger, Ralphs, Safeway, BevMo, Publix, and more. Must be 21 or older to purchase. Please drink responsibly. EVERYONE who signs up wins a FREE WhisperVibe™ OR a FREE Rose toy with any Whisper™ order at https://www.bboutique.co/vibe/absolutely-podcast. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 26 November 2025

On this episode, Heather is suffering from a wine headache, but ready to recap her weekend in Oxford for the Ole Miss game. She chats about the Lane Kiffin conspiracies of Gators, LSU and Theo Von. She takes on the voicemails from people seeking gay bar advice, an unlikely cease and desist, and what it’s like to have your life flash before your eyes. Episode Sponsors: Pick up GOODLES on your next shopping trip… it’s available nationwide at Target and Walmart, plus many other major grocery stores and retailers. Visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT to take advantage of this limited-time offer for up to 20% off your next purchase.  Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.  Treat yourself or someone special to the most comfortable and innovative bras on earth this holiday season. Save 20% off sitewide at honeylove.com/ABSOLUTELY. For a limited time, Wildgrain is offering our listeners $30 off your first box - PLUS free Croissants in every box - when you go to Wildgrain.com/ABSOLUTELY to start your subscription. For a limited time only, our listeners get 15% off and Free Shipping on their premium starter pack when you use code ABSOLUTELY at BranchBasics.com/ABSOLUTELY. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when when you go to nutrafol.com/absolutelynot. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 19 November 2025

On this episode, Heather is coming off the high of the LA show, as well as the Dodger’s World Series Win, but also the low of fighting for her life with some sort of stomach bug in Austin. Heather also has a HUGE family announcement that is causing anxiety but all the excitement. She takes voicemails from Ole Miss tailgaters, Trader Joe’s virgins as well as a show-goer who needed medical attention. Episode Sponsors: Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Visit ProlonLife.com/ABSOLUTELY to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when when you go to nutrafol.com/absolutelynot. For a limited time, Boulevard is offering new customers 20% off your first year subscription. Go to JoinBLVD.com to learn more. Earn points on rent and around your neighborhood, wherever you call home, by going to joinbilt.com/absolutely. Find Kahlúa Dunkin Caramel Swirl at retailers nationwide, including Walmart, Total Wine, Albertsons, Kroger, Ralphs, Safeway, BevMo, Publix, and more. Must be 21 or older to purchase. Please drink responsibly. Get 15% off your first order of $100 or more at hillhousehome.com with code ABSOLUTELY15. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 12 November 2025

On this episode, Heather is in NYC after a slew of shows across Texas, Kentucky and Ohio. So many characters came out to the show, but nothing like Midland Moms drunk on Mountain Dew Margaritas. We also get a Texas Tony update! She takes voicemails from an unlikely DUI charge, doulas dilemmas, debates about starting a travel show. Episode Sponsors: Right now, ABSOLUTELY NOT listeners can save 30% on their first order! Just head to cornbreadhemp.com/ABSOLUTELY and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ABSOLUTELY and get on your way to being your best self. Find your fall staples at Quince. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too. To explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com/absolutely. Want to try a FREE pack of Goodwipes? Just buy a pack at Target, Walmart, Kroger—or your local store—then head to goodwipes.com/ABSOLUTELY, text them your receipt and get reimbursed! EVERYONE who signs up wins a FREE Rose suction toy with their order at https://www.bboutique.co/vibe/absolutely-podcast Head over to Addyi’s website — Addyi.com — and see if Addyi is right for you. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 5 November 2025

On this episode, Heather and Raymond welcome Dog the Bounty Hunter and his late wife, Beth to the pod. They threw together their costumes in 20 minutes to make for a ridiculous take on these two TLC legends. The chat about their favorite movie theatre snacks and how they will never be as put together as Mary Beth Barone and Benito Skinner. They take a voicemail about a very controversial type of baptism. Episode Sponsors: You can get an additional 15% off their 90-day subscription Starter Kit by going to fatty15.com/ABSOLUTELY and using code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. If you visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. Head over to Addyi’s website — Addyi.com — and see if Addyi is right for you. For a limited time, Wildgrain is offering our listeners $30 off your first box - PLUS free Croissants in every box - when you go to Wildgrain.com/ABSOLUTELY to start your subscription.  Get started free, plus get 20% off your first 6 months at Quo.com/ABSOLUTELY. Find your fall staples at Quince. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 29 October 2025

This week, we’re taking it back to one of the most iconic episodes in Absolutely Not history: Burnt My Grundle. In this replay, Heather relives the madness of a piping hot Starbucks to the lap, and goes through some of the most chaotic voicemails. If you’re new here, buckle up. If you’re an OG, you already know this one is a classic. Episode Sponsors: Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Shop my favorite bras and underwear at SKIMS.com. Earn points on rent and around your neighborhood, wherever you call home, by going to joinbilt.com/absolutely To explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com/absolutely. Visit join joinBLVD.com to learn more about Boulevard and book a demo to see if it’s right for your business. Right now, ABSOLUTELY NOT listeners can save 30% on their first order! Just head to cornbreadhemp.com/ABSOLUTELY and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. Find Kahlúa Dunkin Caramel Swirl at retailers nationwide, including Walmart, Total Wine, Albertsons, Kroger, Ralphs, Safeway, BevMo, Publix, and more. Must be 21 or older to purchase. Please drink responsibly. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 22 October 2025

On this episode, Heather is back in Atlanta after the UNWELL weekend in Vegas . She had two insane shows in Florida, flew Breeze nonstop to the Cosmo, and then hung out with Alex Cooper and every housewife you can imagine. While God is good, someone is testing her or has put on a voodoo hex.  Rigs is back in the VET ER, Macaroni maybe has a UTI and the rest of our pets heads are falling off.  We get voicemails from someone that's newly engaged and someone that is debating about dumping their boo over their shower routine. Episode Sponsors: Want to see more of our adventures, laughs, and post-round FRESCA Mixed vibes? Follow @FrescaMixed on Instagram and YouTube for more. Find your fall staples at Quince. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when when you go to nutrafol.com/absolutelynot. Pick up GOODLES on your next shopping trip… it’s available nationwide at Target and Walmart, plus many other major grocery stores and retailers. Head to BranchBasics.com to shop the Premium Starter Kit and save 15% off with code ABSOLUTELY at BranchBasics.com. For Absolutely Not listeners, you can get 20% off your first order at curehydration.com/ABSOLUTELY with code ABSOLUTELY. Head over to Addyi’s website — Addyi.com — and see if Addyi is right for you. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 16 October 2025

On this episode, Heather is fired up about the new Taylor Swift album, seeing Tate McRae in concert and all things that make being a girl the best. She chats about her amazing show in Seattle followed by a humbling flight home. She takes voicemails from other TSwift lovers, bad ass women driving themselves to their own delivery and who pilates is really made for. Episode Sponsors: Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. For a limited time, Prolon is offering listeners 15% off sitewide plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their 5-Day Program! Just visit ProlonLife.com/ABSOLUTELY. This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. This World Mental Health Day, we’re celebrating the therapists who’ve helped millions of people take a step forward. If you’re ready to find the right therapist for you, BetterHelp can help you start that journey. My listeners get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com/ABSOLUTELY. Caraway’s cookware set is a favorite for a reason, it can save you up to $190 versus buying the items individually. Plus, if you visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. Goodwipes is giving away FREE wipes! Want to try a FREE pack of Goodwipes? Just buy a pack at Target, Walmart, Kroger—or your local store—then head to goodwipes.com/ABSOLUTELY, text them your receipt and get reimbursed! Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Want to see more of our adventures, laughs, and post-round FRESCA Mixed vibes? Follow @FrescaMixed on Instagram and YouTube for more. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 8 October 2025

On this episode, Heather is back from the Ryder Cup with a few things to say. Episode Sponsors: To explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com/absolutely For a limited time, Boulevard is offering new customers 20% off your first year subscription. Visit JoinBlvd.com to learn more. Earn points on rent and around your neighborhood, wherever you call home, by going to joinbilt.com/absolutely. Don't be the friend who's always complaining about feeling like garbage—do something about it with LiverMD! Head to 1MD.org and use code [ABSOLUTELY] for 15% off your first order. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when when you go to nutrafol.com/absolutelynot. Find Stouffer's in the freezer aisle today. CAKES body covers have become a staple in my wardrobe this fall. To try them for yourself, go to cakesbody.com. You can even use code ABSOLUTELY for 20% off your first order. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 1 October 2025

On this episode, Heather is excited for the week ahead at the Ryder Cup. She is headed up to New York to host a party at the 1st tee and needs all the single girlies to come through. She also cannot wait for you to see her in the custom Ralph Lauren fits. She chats about upcoming shows- have you gotten your tickets yet?! She takes voicemails from listeners with viral video trolls, Turo rental car woes, and magnesium intake. Episode Sponsors: Right now, ABSOLUTELY NOT listeners can save 30% on their first order! Just head to cornbreadhemp.com/ABSOLUTELY and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns Use Coupon Code ABSOLUTELY for a $10 telemed Appointment at Addyi.com Head to BranchBasics.com to shop the Premium Starter Kit and save 15% off with code ABSOLUTELY at BranchBasics.com. Find Stouffer’s in the freezer aisle today. You can get an additional 15% off their 90-day subscription Starter Kit by going to fatty15.com/ABSOLUTELY and using code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 24 September 2025

On this episode, Heather is back in Atlanta after hosting the EMMY’s Live from the Red Carpet for E! She chats about how hot this carpet was, the celebs and friends that she saw, and what after parties she got to hit. She dreams about her future in television and how she would crush Dancing with the Stars. We have voicemails from yacht sellers, girls with jealous SIL and a girl that finds herself in an episode of The Hunting Wives.  Episode Sponsors: Go toSquarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Caraway’s cookware set is a favorite for a reason, it can save you up to $190 versus buying the items individually. Plus, if you visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. For Absolutely Not listeners, Cure is offering 20% off your first order! Stay hydrated and feel your best by visiting curehydration.com/ABSOLUTELY and using promo code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. Over 1.5 million people are already giving their livers the support they deserve. Don't be the friend who's always complaining about feeling like garbage—do something about it with LiverMD! Head to 1MD.org and use code [ABSOLUTELY] for 15% off your first order. Find Stouffer’s in the freezer aisle today. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 17 September 2025

On this episode, Heather is coming to you from her hotel room in LA.  She chats about her shows this past weekend in Omaha and Denver as well as the exciting week ahead where she will be back working with E! on the EMMY’s red carpet. She dives into your voicemails from fans in the front row, to buying an international home and whether your nail lady has your back. Episode Sponsors: This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ABSOLUTELY and get on your way to being your best self. When you enroll in an ASPCA Pet Health Insurance plan, you could get a $25 Amazon gift card. It's a little treat for you while you’re doing something great for your pet. To explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com/absolutely. See thicker, stronger, faster-growing hair with less shedding in just 3-6 months with Nutrafol. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to nutrafol.com/absolutelynot. For a limited time, you can be first in line to experience the new Next Gen at special savings. Prolon is offering Absolutely Not listeners 15% off sitewide plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their 5-Day Nutrition Program! Just visit ProlonLife.com/ABSOLUTELY OpenPhone is offering my listeners 20% off of your first 6 months at OpenPhone.com/absolutely. Earn points on rent and around your neighborhood, wherever you call home, by going to joinbilt.com/absolutely. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 11 September 2025

On this episode, Heather is in Atlanta and gearing up for a couple of wild upcoming weeks. She chats about the stresses of still living with Robin and solutions like joining a dojo or becoming a kickboxer. Decision fatigue has fully set in.  She takes your voicemails about psychotic husband behavior, how to be a good neighbor, southern pronunciations, what the heck is happening with Sacramento show as well as the Unwell weekend. Episode Sponsors: Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Absolutely not going to let your liver down anymore? Head to 1MD.org and use code [ABSOLUTELY] for 15% off your first order of LiverMD. To find out what all the hype is about for yourself, go to cakesbody.com. You can even use code ABSOLUTEY for 20% off your first order this summer. Trust me, you need some GOODLES mac & cheese in your life! Pick up GOODLES on your next shopping trip… it’s available nationwide at Target and Walmart, plus many other major grocery stores and retailers. Want to try a FREE pack of Goodwipes? Just buy a pack at Target, Walmart, Kroger—or your local store—then head to goodwipes.com/ABSOLUTELY, text them your receipt and get reimbursed! Shop SKIMS Ultimate Bra Collection and more at SKIMS.com and SKIMS LA Flagship on Sunset Blvd. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 3 September 2025

On this episode, Heather is back in the Atlanta studio after getting back on the road with The Bamboozled Tour in Memphis and Charlotte.  The Showgirl is back on the road and another showgirl is engaged! She chats about what went down in each city and goes down sorority rush memory lane.  We get back to the voicemails where she takes on another type of wedding proposal, airline chicken etiquette and if too much baby oil is a thing. Episode Sponsors: Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information. Visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT or use code ABSOLUTELYNOT at checkout to take an additional 10% off your next purchase. Shop my favorite bras and underwear at SKIMS.com. Don't be the friend who's always complaining about feeling like garbage—do something about it with LiverMD! Head to 1MD.org and use code [ABSOLUTELY] for 15% off your first order. Go to cokeurl.com/simplyPOP to find out where you can try Simply Pop! Ready to clean up your home and your health? Head to BranchBasics.com to shop their Premium Starter Kit and save 15% off with code ABSOLUTELY at BranchBasics.com. Addyi is the number one prescribed treatment, it’s helped thousands of women. Put your lip gloss on. A little self tan. And look into Addyi at addyi.com. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 27 August 2025

On this episode, Heather is in LA and welcomes her fabulous friend, Retta to the pod! Retta and Heather met at a friend's birthday in Mexico and connected over margaritas and steak. They chat about auditions, how Glen Powell smells, and what’s a must have in her dressing room. Episode Sponsors: Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information. Go toSquarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Elevate your fall wardrobe essentials with Quince. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Earn points on rent and around your neighborhood, wherever you call home, by going to joinbilt.com/absolutely. Treat yourself to the most comfortable and innovative bras on earth and save 20% Off sitewide at honeylove.com/ABSOLUTELY. OpenPhone is offering my listeners 20% off of your first 6 months at OpenPhone.com/absolutely. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 21 August 2025

This week, we’re reminiscing tales from Heather’s last tour ahead of some stops in Tennessee and Texas. In this replay episode, she breaks down the details of the insane predicament she found herself in at the Memphis airport. She also ran into a couple Lasso kids in Texas and was slinging art in Mississippi for Robin like drug dealer from the 80's. That and more! Episode Sponsors: Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT. For a limited time, you can be first in line to experience the new Next Gen at special savings. Prolon is offering Absolutely Not listeners 15% off sitewide plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their 5-Day Nutrition Program at ProlonLife.com/ABSOLUTELY. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. Right now, ABSOLUTELY NOT listeners can save 30% on their first order! Just head to cornbreadhemp.com/ABSOLUTELY and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. Go to cokeurl.com/simplyPOP to find out where you can try Simply Pop! Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 13 August 2025

On this episode, Heather is back in Atlanta after her annual European summer vacay.  She has weeded through her tik-tok trolls only to realize she has come out ahead as America’s Unc. She relives her boat days, her Air France journey home, and her back to school shopping memories. She takes voicemails from girls on a best friend trip to Italy, gift giving and golf bag woes, and why she is going to Iowa. Episode Sponsors: Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information. You can shop Caraway Risk-Free! Enjoy fast, free shipping, easy returns, and a 30-day trial. Plus, if you visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ABSOLUTELY and get on your way to being your best self. To explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com/absolutely. Elevate your fall wardrobe essentials with Quince. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 6 August 2025

On this episode, Heather is recording straight from a pool house in Mallorca—armed with nothing but her phone, a questionable Wi-Fi signal, and enough acid reflux to ignite a small fire. She’s giving us a mid-vacation dispatch packed with thoughts on travel etiquette, her ongoing battle with GLP-1, and a passionate tribute to the unsung pop legacy of Brooke Hogan. Plus, a quick tour update and a reminder that boat days are the best days. Episode Sponsors: Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT. OpenPhone is offering my listeners 20% off of your first 6 months at OpenPhone.com/absolutely. To explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com/absolutely. Start paying rent through Bilt and take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/absolutely. Philadelphia makes everything creamier. Visit creamcheese.com for recipe inspiration and so you can start adding Philadelphia to your recipes at home! Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 30 July 2025

On this replay of the pod from almost exactly 3 years ago, we get Heather fresh off her extra long honeymoon. While she should feel refreshed, renewed and wildly in love- she is lucky to not be in an italian jail cell after clearly spending too much time with her new husband, Jeff. She breaks down the importance of communication, how much wine she drank every day at lunch and her plans to do it all over again (which she currently is doing in Portugal). Episode Sponsors: Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information. Head to https://www.squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code ABSOLUTELY. Go to cokeurl.com/simplyPOP to find out where you can try Simply Pop! Right now, ABSOLUTELY NOT listeners can save 30% on their first order! Just head to CornbreadHemp.com/ABSOLUTELY and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. OpenPhone is offering my listeners 20% off of your first 6 months at OpenPhone.com/absolutely. Give your summer closet an upgrade—with Quince. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and three hundred and 365-day returns. To find out what all the hype is about for yourself, go to cakesbody.com. You can even use code ABSOLUTEY for 20% off your first order this summer. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 23 July 2025

On this episode, Heather welcomes the one and only Robin McMahan to the studio. Robin is back from Portugal with a group of fabulous older women and bestows some advice before Heather's trip. They discuss the infamous EGG HAT, European Zara’s and the price of seabass. They obviously go into Robin’s dating dilemmas. They take your voicemails about boomers, summers at Chateau McMahan and the amount of virgin piña coladas Heather used to drink. Episode Sponsors: Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns Head to https://www.squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code ABSOLUTELY. If you visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. Prolon is offering Absolutely Not listeners 15% off sitewide plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their 5-Day Nutrition Program! Just visit ProlonLife.com/ABSOLUTELY To find out what all the hype is about for yourself, go to cakesbody.com. You can even use code ABSOLUTEY for 20% off your first order this summer. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 16 July 2025

On this episode, Heather is in LA and welcoming her favorite bitch, Jackie Schimmel, who is about to head out on her own tour- Dim the Lights. They discuss how we all need to zoom out, berating each other's husbands, and social boundaries. Jackie takes Heather down on her unsolicited kindness to strangers while Heather then gets to the bottom of why Jackie didn’t join us on the cruise.  Episode Sponsors: Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully). Visit dukesmayo.com for more information. Right now, you can get up to $200 off Square hardware at square.com/go/absolutely. This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ABSOLUTELY and get on your way to being your best self.  Get 15% off your first order of $100 or more at hillhousehome.com with code ABSOLUTELY15. Start paying rent through Bilt and take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/absolutely. Go to cokeurl.com/simplyPOP to find out where you can try Simply Pop! To explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com/absolutely. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 9 July 2025

On this episode, Heather is on the up and up after the events of the last few weeks. She chats about how turtles and cardinals are now showing up as signs, what it was like 100 years ago, and how she plans to spend her time in Europe. While her life may be hectic right now, she turns to your voicemails to bring her back to reality. She hears about Louisiana gay uncles, how comfortable people have gotten in public and totally unhinged church facebook group requests. Episode Sponsors: Find Duke’s Mayo at your local retailer. If it’s not there, riot (respectfully) Visit dukesmayo.com for more information. Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT. OpenPhone is offering my listeners 20% off of your first 6 months at OpenPhone.com/absolutely. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. Right now, ABSOLUTELY NOT listeners can save 30% on their first order! Just head to CornbreadHemp.com/ABSOLUTELY and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 2 July 2025

On this episode, Heather is back in the Atlanta studio after a very stressful and eventful week. Definitely feels like she can't get her neck above water and brings you along her insane days. She relives her experience at the emergency vet that could rival The Pitt, getting her pap on her anniversary, and receiving a very special gift that may be light at the end of a very long tunnel. She then takes voicemails about how the rest of the world is also on on fire and one caller's decision to move to the USA. Episode Sponsors: Plus, if you visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. Get 15% off your first order of $100 or more at hillhousehome.com with code ABSOLUTELY15. To find out what all the hype is about for yourself, go to cakesbody.com. You can even use code ABSOLUTEY for 20% off your first order this summer. Go to cokeurl.com/simplyPOP to find out where you can try Simply Pop! Right now, Splendid is offering our listeners 20% off when you go to Splendid.com and use promo code absolutely at checkout or when you shop at Splendid in stores. Head to BranchBasics.com to shop their Premium Starter Kit and save 15% off with code ABSOLUTELY at BranchBasics.com. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 25 June 2025

This week, we're pulling another classic episode out of the archives for the newcomers. This one features one of the wildest voicemails we've heard yet, a mom having to break the holy water out for her daughter, and a surprise cameo from Robin. Episode Sponsors: Start paying rent through Bilt and take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/absolutely. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT. Go to cokeurl.com/simplyPOP to find out where you can try Simply Pop! Right now, Skylight is offering our listeners $30 off their 15 inch Calendars by going to SkylightCal.com/ABSOLUTELY To explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com/absolutely. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 18 June 2025

Given her vast array of expertise, Gabby Windey takes her guests on a deep dive into the topics today’s audiences care about: dating (duh), sexuality (hell yes), health & mental health (ugh so important) plus a healthy dose of pop culture shit talk.Each episode, Gabby will be interviewing guests with the ultimate goal to break down walls and get beyond the typical interview questions— “So tell us about yourself” doesn’t actually tell us anything about who the person really is- does it?! Instead, she skips the surface and plunges right into the core. Drawing from her experience as an ICU nurse, NFL cheerleader, and being The Bachelorette- Gabby is able to bring a unique perspective to each conversation. With discussions covering serious and relatable topics but approached from relatability and heart (along with Gabby’s wicked sense of humor— of course).See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 13 June 2025

On this episode, Heather welcomes her friend from the internet Tinx to the pod after they both separately went to Beyonce the night before! They question why they have never met up for a 3 martini lunch and why finance bros get to enjoy them all the time. They connect on being pulled in too many directions and how they should start the Artist Way this summer. With an overdue book proposal, Heather asks Tinx about her book writing process after her new bestseller- Hotter in the Hamptons. Prolon is offering Absolutely Not listeners an exclusive chance to be among the first to try Next Gen—with 15% off sitewide plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their 5-Day Program at ProlonLife.com/ABSOLUTELY! Nuuly is a great value at $98 a month for any 6 styles, but right now you can get $28 off your first month of Nuuly when you sign up with the code ABSOLUTELY at Nuuly.com. Visit OliveandJune.com/ABSOLUTELY20 for 20% off your first System! Pick up GOODLES on your next shopping trip… it’s available nationwide at Target and Walmart, plus many other major grocery stores and retailers. To explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com/absolutely. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 12 June 2025

On the episode, Heather is fresh off her NYC takeover—including a memorable night at The Beacon. Now she’s back in her basement, recording old-school style and fighting off whatever funk the universe sent as a reminder to sit down and reset. She’s booking check-ups, trying new beauty hacks, and figuring out what’s going on with her wonky wrist. Plus, she shares her run-in with cosmetic consultation scammers, the betrayal of high-calorie coffee orders, and why she’s dreaming of climbing Mount Everest. (Spoiler: she's not.) Episode Sponsors: Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Right now, you can get up to $200 off Square hardware at square.com/go/ABSOLUTELY. If you visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. This episode is sponsored by/brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ABSOLUTELY. Nuuly is a great value at $98 a month for any 6 styles, but right now you can get $28 off your first month of Nuuly when you sign up with the code ABSOLUTELY at Nuuly.com. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 4 June 2025

On this episode, Heather is back in NYC and welcomes two cruising hussies to the pod. Andrea and Anna are hosts of their own pod Big Wigs but are famously known for their impressions.  They chat about how they met, the cruise, their favorite Boar’s Head meats, and being related to a serial killer. We also get a surprise appearance from two of their favorite Calabasas characters. Episode Sponsors: For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT. Start paying rent through Bilt and take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/absolutely Visit ProlonLife.com/ABSOLUTELY to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift. Nuuly is a great value at $98 a month for any 6 styles, but right now you can get $28 off your first month of Nuuly when you sign up with the code ABSOLUTELY at Nuuly.com Visit OliveandJune.com/ABSOLUTELY20 for 20% off your first System! Give the “dads” in your life a unique, heartfelt gift you’ll all cherish for years—Storyworth! Right now, save $10 during their Father’s Day sale when you go to Storyworth.com/absolutely! Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 28 May 2025

On this episode, Heather welcomes Kelsey Cook to the podcast studio. Kelsey is another fabulous comic that is on tour and has released her new special, Mark Your Territory. They connect on never being to Coachella, the similarities of boomers and millennials, survival jobs and where they stand on Crumbl cookies. Kelsey also finds out that she is actually another race because she is a red head. Episode Sponsors: Start paying rent through Bilt and take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to joinbilt.com/absolutely Visit JustThriveHealth.com and use code ABSOLUTELY for 20% off your first 90 day bottle. That’s like getting a month for free! Get 15% off Branch Basics with the code ABSOLUTELY at https://branchbasics.com/ABSOLUTELY #branchbasicspod Visit ProlonLife.com/ABSOLUTELY to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift. Schedule your free consultation now at Sonobello.com/absolutely. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 28 May 2025

On this episode, Heather is in the studio after a big weekend performing at her home theatre - The Fox. She chats about how doing a show at home can be more stressful than any other cities and how the acquaintances come out of the woodwork to get those free tickets. She tries to relax on Sunday by putting out all her lawn furniture for the summer but the heat index had other plans. She is excited to get to NYC for her show at the Beacon and her week in the city. She gets to take some voicemail about the after party, a lost photo and a hot take on recording comedians. Episode Sponsors: Head to https://www.squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code ABSOLUTELY. Treat yourself to the most advanced bras and shapewear on the market. Save 20% Off Honeylove at honeylove.com/ABSOLUTELY Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns. Head to http://primalkitchen.com/absolutelynotpodcast to save 20% off your next online order with code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. Right now, Skylight is offering our listeners $30 off their 15 inch Calendars by going to SkylightCal.com/ABSOLUTELY Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com/absolutely today.  Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 21 May 2025

On the episode, Heather is feeling nautical (and musical) in a fully bedazzled ship captain’s hat. She has some hot takes on the newly appointed American pope and shares some of the gifts she received on the cruise. She dives into Robin’s controversial stance on why dining out on Mother’s Day is an absolute no and then provides advice to your voicemails about breakups, cocktails, and short skirts. Episode Sponsors: Head to https://www.squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code ABSOLUTELY. If you visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT. Prolon is offering Absolutely Not listeners an exclusive chance to be among the first to try Next Gen—with 15% off sitewide plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their 5-Day Program at ProlonLife.com/absolutely.  Shop SKIMS Ultimate Bra Collection and more at SKIMS.com. Pick up GOODLES on your next shopping trip. It’s available nationwide at Target and Walmart, plus many other major grocery stores and retailers. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 14 May 2025

On the episode, Heather is home for a few days and back in the Atlanta studio.  She has been enjoying her few days at home, before it’s back on the road. She goes over how Robin’s trip to Portugal has been going and how her own show in Chicago went. She takes on the voicemails to find probably the #1 absolutely not of all time.  Can this be the one? Episode Sponsors: AG1 is offering new subscribers a FREE $76 gift when you sign up. You’ll get a Welcome Kit, a bottle of D3K2 AND 5 free travel packs in your first box. So make sure to check out DrinkAG1.com/absolutely to get this offer! This episode is sponsored by/brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ABSOLUTELY and get on your way to being your best self. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com/absolutely today. Start earning points on rent you’re already paying by going to joinbilt.com/ABSOLUTELY. Head to http://primalkitchen.com/absolutelynotpodcast to save 20% off your next online order with code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. Nuuly is a great value at $98 a month for any 6 styles, but right now you can get $28 off your first month of Nuuly when you sign up with the code ABSOLUTELY at Nuuly.com Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 7 May 2025

Taste of Taylor is a podcast hosted by radio veteran Taylor Strecker, where pop culture, entertainment news, and the amusing chaos of Taylor’s life collide.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 7 May 2025

On this episode, Heather is taking it old school and recording live from a hotel room in Miami. No, she isn’t still on the cruise, she is back to working girl life as a corporate girlie. She gives the cruise recap from her perspective and how emotional it made it. She also chats about another milestone-reaching 1 million miles on Delta. She wraps it up with more cruise voicemails from cruisers themselves. Episode Sponsors: Start earning points on rent you’re already paying by going to joinbilt.com/ABSOLUTELY AG1 is offering new subscribers a FREE $76 gift when you sign up. You’ll get a Welcome Kit, a bottle of D3K2 AND 5 free travel packs in your first box. So make sure to check out DrinkAG1.com/absolutely to get this offer! Head to https://www.squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code ABSOLUTELY Head to http://primalkitchen.com/absolutelynotpodcast to save 20% off your next online order with code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. Nuuly is a great value at $98 a month for any 6 styles, but right now you can get $28 off your first month of Nuuly when you sign up with the code ABSOLUTELY at Nuuly.com. Visit OliveandJune.com/ABSOLUTELY20 for 20% off your first System!  Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 30 April 2025

On this truly iconic episode, Heather is coming to you live from the Absolutely Knot cruise.  She has a live audience on the deck and two guests to bring you all the on board updates and of course, Absolutely Not’s.  If you have all the fomo, you will not want to miss this one. Episode Sponsors: Our favorite cookware set will save you $150 versus buying the items individually. Plus, if you visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. Whether you're gifting to yourself or a loved one, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off any order! Enjoy free shipping when you subscribe. Go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOTGIFT. Shop SKIMS Ultimate Bra Collection and more at SKIMS.com and SKIMS LA Flagship on Sunset Blvd. After you place your order, be sure to let them know I sent you! Head to http://primalkitchen.com/absolutelynotpodcast to save 20% off your next online order with code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com/absolutely today. Right now, our listeners get 15% off the Premium Starter Kit by using code ABSOLUTELY at BranchBasics.com Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 23 April 2025

On this episode, Heather is physically on the cruise, but has brought you a Master’s recap prior to boarding the ship.  She chats about her time at the Par 3, trying to be everyone else’s photographer, and of course the coveted merch haul. She also has a message for the millennial white women's fashion choices. Episode Sponsors: Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Start earning points on rent you’re already paying by going to joinbilt.com/ABSOLUTELY Head over to Addyi’s website — Addyi.com — and see if Addyi is right for you. Just visit ProlonLife.com/ABSOLUTELY to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift. Treat yourself to the most advanced bras and shapewear on the market. Save 20% Off Honeylove at honeylove.com/ABSOLUTELY. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 18 April 2025

On this episode, Heather is back with Rosebud Baker for a light pregame just in time for The Absolutely Knot Cruise. Rosebud chats about her relationship, becoming a mom, and taking her comedy in a new direction this time around on tour. They also drop some piping hot takes on the Real Housewives and give the scoop on their upcoming cruise shenanigans. It's been a long road and the ladies are at Brat Status - as they should be! Episode Sponsors: Pick up GOODLES on your next shopping trip… it’s available nationwide at major grocery stores and retailers. Absolutely Not is sponsored by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/ABSOLUTELY today to get 10% off your first month. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com/absolutely today. Head to http://primalkitchen.com/absolutelynotpodcast to save 20% off your next online order with code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. Nuuly is a great value at $98 a month for any 6 styles, but right now you can get $28 off your first month of Nuuly when you sign up with the code ABSOLUTELY at Nuuly.com Head over to Addyi’s website — Addyi.com — and see if Addyi is right for you. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 9 April 2025

On this episode, Heather is back in Atlanta after a great show in Raleigh and then being a guest on Adam Ray’s Dr. Phil Live in Atlanta. Like everyone else, she has been attacked by the insane pollen that is plaguing the south, but she is rejoicing with some amazing news she received this past week!  She gets back to the voicemails from all of you! Episode Sponsors: Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off any order! Enjoy free shipping when you subscribe. Go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOTGIFT. Visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELY you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. To explore coverage, visit ASPCAPetInsurance.com/absolutely. Nuuly is a great value at $98 a month for any 6 styles, but right now you can get $28 off your first month of Nuuly when you sign up with the code ABSOLUTELY at Nuuly.com Head over to Addyi’s website — Addyi.com — and see if Addyi is right for you. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 2 April 2025

Join Khloé Kardashian each week for intimate conversations with the people who inspire her the most. Each episode dives deep into relatable and thought-provoking topics, offering a mix of humor, insight, and real-life stories. Whether it’s about navigating life’s challenges, celebrating triumphs, or finding humor in the everyday, this series delivers the kind of real talk that stays with you long after you’ve listened.New episodes drop every Wednesday on X and Thursdays wherever you get your podcasts.Produced by Dear Media.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 2 April 2025

On this episode, Heather welcomes Boho Britt and Amber from Salty Locks Extensions and Studio 285. Heather believes that being close to your glam team is one of the most important things you can cultivate and these two sisters have truly become part of the family. They chat about a ChatGPT boyfriend, catchphrases and even quantum physics. They are two business baddies that will also be joining the crew on the Absolutely Knot. Episode Sponsors: Listeners of Absolutely Not can claim an exclusive three-month free trial, with no credit card required at www.YNAB.com/absolutely AG1 is offering new subscribers a FREE $76 gift when you sign up. You’ll get a Welcome Kit, a bottle of D3K2 AND 5 free travel packs in your first box. So make sure to check out DrinkAG1.com/absolutely to get this offer Visit JustThriveHealth.com and use code ABSOLUTELY for 20% off your first 90 day bottle. Head to http://primalkitchen.com/absolutelynotpodcast to save 20% off your next online order with code ABSOLUTELY at checkout Head over to Addyi’s website — Addyi.com — and see if Addyi is right for you. Save big during their Winter Savings event – Schedule your free consultation now at SonoBello.com/ABSOLUTELY Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 26 March 2025

New to Dear Media: Join iconic Hollywood couple Lisa Rinna and Harry Hamlin for a candid, hilarious, and totally outrageous podcast about life, love, and everything in between. You may know them from their acting careers (For Lisa - Days of Our Lives, Melrose Place and a four-time Daytime Emmy nominee; For Harry - Clash of the Titans, LA Law, his Emmy-nominated role in Mad Men, Mayfair Witches) or Lisa's unforgettable 8-year stint on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, but there's a lot more to this duo than what you've seen on screen. With Lisa's bold, larger-than-life personality and Harry's laid-back charm, this couple could not be more different. But after more than 30 years together, they've proven that opposites really do attract. Together, Lisa and Harry dive deep into the highs and lows of their careers, stories from their marriage, and juicy behind-the-scenes gossip from their years in the industry. Whether they're laughing, debating, or reminiscing, "Let's Not Talk About the Husband" is the perfect blend of humor and heart. No matter what Lisa and Harry are discussing, there's one thing you can count on - they're going to own it, baby! Tune in for new episodes every Friday.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 21 March 2025

On this episode, Heather is back in Atlanta after a fantastic weekend of birthday shows in the DMV. She had a hell of a time celebrating her 38th with the shows at Capitol One Hall and partying with her friends there. She makes a plea for Tatte to come to Atlanta. She discusses how the vibes are in DC and explains who her new favorite southern auntie Doctor is. She takes your voicemails about burnt grundles, solo dates, and how the Heather 911 is sometimes a force for good! Episode Sponsors: Head to https://www.squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code ABSOLUTELY. Use code ABSOLUTELY15 for 15% off your first purchase at LumeDeodorant.com.  Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com/absolutely today. Head over to Addyi’s website — Addyi.com — and see if Addyi is right for you. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 19 March 2025

On this episode, Heather is back in Atlanta and taking some time for herself after having a small breakdown on International Women's Day. She is changing her attitude and putting positive energy towards her goals. She recaps the end of her week at the Today Show and the hard sleep on her flight to LA that has caused her to spiral.  She takes on the voicemails and provides her best advice on how to VIBE OUT on the Bamboozled Tour and the Absolutely Knot Cruise. Episode Sponsors: Visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT or use code ABSOLUTELYNOT at checkout. Start earning points on rent you’re already paying by going to joinbilt.com/ABSOLUTELY. Head over to Addyi’s website — Addyi.com — and see if Addyi is right for you. Shop SKIMS best intimates including the Fits Everybody Collection and more at SKIMS.com and SKIMS stores. To help you kickstart a health plan that truly works, Prolon is offering Absolutely Not listeners 15% off sitewide plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their 5-Day Nutrition Program at ProlonLife.com/ABSOLUTELY Visit JustThriveHealth.com and use code ABSOLUTELY for 20% off your first 90 day bottle. That’s like getting a month for free! Listeners of Absolutely Not can claim an exclusive three-month free trial, with no credit card required at www.YNAB.com/absolutely. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 12 March 2025

On this episode, Heather is in the NYC studio with comedian Sam Morril. Sam is currently touring the US with his own “Errors Tour”. Heather and Sam get into life on the road as touring comics. Sam has chosen to ride on a sleeper bus and eat halal, but just like Heather has back issues and also loves a steakhouse and a martini. Episode Sponsors: Right now, ABSOLUTELY NOT listeners can save 30% on their first order! Just head to CornbreadHemp.com/ABSOLUTELY and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT. This episode is sponsored by/brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ABSOLUTELY and get on your way to being your best self. Right now, OpenPhone is offering 20% off of your first 6 months when you go to OpenPhone.com/ABSOLUTELY. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com/absolutely today. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 5 March 2025

On this episode, Heather is in NYC to co-host the Today Show and so excited to give you a behind the scenes look into the start of her week with Jenna Bush Hager. We find out who her work crush is at the studio and how she took Jenna out on the town to a gay country bar. She also touches on the previous week in Iowa where there was a missed connection or a case of mistaken identity at a Walgreens full of Cookie Monster pajamas. Episode Sponsors: Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Listeners of Absolutely Not can claim an exclusive three-month free trial, with no credit card required at www.YNAB.com/absolutely. Visit JustThriveHealth.com and use code ABSOLUTELY for 20% off your first 90 day bottle. Head over to Addyi’s website — Addyi.com — and see if Addyi is right for you. Shop SKIMS best intimates including the Fits Everybody Collection and more at SKIMS.com and SKIMS stores. Try VIIA! https://viia.co/ABSOLUTELY and use code ABSOLUTELY! Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 26 February 2025

On this episode, Heather is in Vegas for The Bamboozled Tour and is coming to you live from her hotel room at the Venetian.  She also welcomes her writing partner and special director, Jen Zaborowski, to the pod.  They chat about Jen coming out on the road and how a tour stop in Vegas just hits different. They discuss barrel vs boot cut jeans, Glen Powell, Hollywood parties and who will be vacay besties on the Absolutely Knot cruise. Episode Sponsors: For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners ten dollars off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT. Give yourself the luxury you deserve with Quince! Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. To get $100 towards your first bed purchase, go to Thuma.co/ABSOLUTELY. Right now, our listeners get 15% off the Premium Starter Kit by using code ABSOLUTELY at BranchBasics.com If you visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @lumedeodorant and get 15% off with promo code ABSOLUTELY15 at Lumedeodorant.com! Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 19 February 2025

On this episode, Heather is back in Atlanta after an amazing time in Alabama opening up the Bamboozled Tour. She chats about the amazing audience members and how some of her controversial material played on the crowds.  She brings up all of the Super Bowl drama and how we need to leave Taylor alone.  She gets to voicemails and realizes we are all doing too much!! Episode Sponsors: Go to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Listeners of Absolutely Not can claim an exclusive three-month free trial, with no credit card required at www.YNAB.com/absolutely. Visit JustThriveHealth.com and use code ABSOLUTELY for 20% off your first 90 day bottle. Right now, OpenPhone is offering 20% off of your first 6 months when you go to OpenPhone.com/ABSOLUTELY Save big during their Winter Savings event - schedule your free consultation now at Sonobello.com/absolutely. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 12 February 2025

On this episode, Heather is back on her power walks and trying to get her mornings off to a great start.  She has her weighted vest on and is pumping up tunes from this year's Grammy winners.  She was motivated by online haters on Reddit that caused her to spiral. She is excited to get back on the road and start trying out new bits which she got to test out on a secret group of corporate girlies this past week. She got a few days to sip on painkillers, listen to some steel drums and reminisce about the life of Jimmy Buffett.  She takes on the voicemails of yes’s and no’s. Episode Sponsors: Right now, Not listeners can save 30% on their first order! Just head to cornbreadhemp.com and use code at checkout. AG1 is offering new subscribers a FREE $76 gift when you sign up. You’ll get a Welcome Kit, a bottle of D3K2 AND 5 free travel packs in your first box. So make sure to check out DrinkAG1.com/absolutely to get this offer!  This episode is sponsored by/brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/ABSOLUTELY and get on your way to being your best self. Head over to Addyi’s website — Addyi.com — and see if Addyi is right for you. Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/absolutely. To get $100 towards your first bed purchase, go to Thuma.com/absolutely.  Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 5 February 2025

On this episode, Heather was excited to share her vision board but mishaps with some vino leads her to verbalize it. We learn about her hopes and dreams for the upcoming year, as well as a traumatizing past job opportunity that has left a mark on how she navigates life. She goes over the newest activities happening on the Absolutely Knot cruise and gives hints as to what will happen on the Bamboozled Tour. She then takes on your voicemails! Episode Sponsors: Start earning points with the Bilt Mastercard by going to joinbilt.com/ABSOLUTELY. Head to https://www.squarespace.com/ABSOLUTELY to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code ABSOLUTELY. Listeners of Absolutely Not can claim an exclusive three-month free trial, with no credit card required at www.YNAB.com/absolutely. Visit JustThriveHealth.com and use code ABSOLUTELY for 20% off your first 90 day bottle. Visit Carawayhome.com/ABSOLUTELYNOT you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. If you’re 21+, check out viiahemp.com and use the code ABSOLUTELY to receive 15% off AND if you’re new to VIIA - get a free gift of your choice.  Right now, our listeners get 15% off their entire order by using code at BranchBasics.com. Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcribed - Published: 29 January 2025