The Baggage Reclaim Sessions

Natalie shares a personal update about taking a brief podcast break to recalibrate after a challenging year of surgery, medical menopause, and cancer diagnosis - plus encouragement for anyone wrestling with giving themselves permission to pause.   Episode show notes: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/295 Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast  'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/        

Transcribed - Published: 30 May 2025

Natalie challenges the exhausting habit of self-blame when things go wrong, exploring why we make everything about our "unworthiness" rather than recognising systemic issues or others' responsibility. A compassionate reminder that it's not all on you. Episode show notes: https://baggagereclaim.co.uk/294 Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast  'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/  

Transcribed - Published: 15 May 2025

Natalie chats with her friend Karen Arthur about their 16-year "age-gap" friendship and how Karen reinvented herself after 50, becoming a model, designer, podcaster and author after leaving a 28-year teaching career. A joyful reminder that it's never too late to bloom.   Episode show notes:  Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast  'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/    

Transcribed - Published: 2 May 2025

Natalie talks with coach Tiffany Han about why procrastination isn't about laziness but a response to being chronically overextended. Learn how to stop beating yourself up and start working with your natural capacity rather than against it. Episode show notes:  Tiffany Han's website:  Tiffany Han Insta Tiffany Han's procrastination freebie Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast  'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/  

Transcribed - Published: 18 April 2025

Natalie shares her recent diagnosis and how listening to her intuition about needing surgery likely saved her life. A powerful reminder that trusting ourselves - even when it's messy and imperfect - is one of the most important skills we can develop.  Episode show notes:  Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the pod by donating to the tip jar: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast  'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/    

Transcribed - Published: 4 April 2025

Natalie breaks down the five styles of people pleasing (gooding, efforting, avoiding, saving, and suffering) helping you identify your pattern and understand how it's blocking your happiness. Discover why you people-please and how to finally start breaking free from this exhausting cycle. Episode show notes: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/290 Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast  'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/        

Transcribed - Published: 21 March 2025

Natalie explores why we feel so disappointed in early dating - is it the other person letting us down, or are we falling for our own fantasies? Learn to recognize when you're dating your imagination instead of the real person sitting across from you. Episode show notes: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/289 Save 30% on Relationship Fundamentals classes: Readying for Love | Overcoming Dating Anxiety | The Compatibility Factor | Could This Be It? | Know Where You Stand | Co-Piloting Your Relationship Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast  'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/      

Transcribed - Published: 7 March 2025

Natalie talks with author and journalist Anna Goldfarb about why modern friendships feel so complicated, exploring how to navigate relationships in an age where we're more connected yet often feel more isolated than ever. Episode show notes: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/288 Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast  'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/    

Transcribed - Published: 7 February 2025

Natalie opens up about her decision to break up with her mother, exploring how she arrived at this choice and why sometimes stepping away from relationships - even with parents - is necessary for healing and being able to live your life with love, care, trust and respect.  Episode show notes: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/287 Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast  Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/  

Transcribed - Published: 24 January 2025

Natalie talks with financial therapist Rachel Duncan about why our relationship with money runs deeper than budgets and bank balances. Together, they explore how our early experiences and emotional patterns shape our money story, and why healing our relationship with money is about so much more than just learning to manage it better. Note: the term 'f-up' is mentioned a few times in the episode.  Rachel Duncan: https://www.moneyhealingclub.com Save 50% on your first month of Money Healing Club membership with the code BAGGAGE: https://www.moneyhealingclub.com/club  'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/ Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast   

Transcribed - Published: 10 January 2025

Natalie takes us on a candid exploration of self-advocacy and what it means to truly have our own back. Drawing from her personal experiences in 2024, she digs into why speaking up for ourselves can feel so challenging, how our people-pleasing tendencies get in the way, and why being "difficult" or causing inconvenience when advocating for ourselves isn't just okay - it's necessary for our wellbeing. Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast  'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/    

Transcribed - Published: 27 December 2024

This week's episode is about attachment, a topic Natalie's delving into for the first time with integrative coach, Elfreda Manahan-Vaughn because she's never been able to see herself in the popular attachment narrative, and she knew there must be others who felt the same way. Natalie and Elfreda discuss a more expansive, nuanced, inclusive understanding of attachment and how it can liberate, instead of hold you back. They talk about the importance of understanding one's own patterns, and the potential for personal growth and earned security, emphasising the adaptability of attachment styles and the steps individuals can take to foster healthier connections with themselves and others. Elfreda Manahan-Vaugn's Mettamorphics website Elfreda on Instagram and LinkedIn 'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/ Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast   

Transcribed - Published: 13 December 2024

Natalie chats with Lindsay C. Gibson, the author of million-copy selling 'Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents'. They delve into the characteristics of emotionally immature parents, the impact on their children, and the resulting emotional loneliness. They also discuss the importance of understanding these dynamics, the process of reparenting, and the nuances of emotional expression. The conversation highlights how these experiences shape adult relationships and the tendency towards people pleasing as a coping mechanism. They round out their chat with advice for people who want to break the cycle in their own parenting and for those who've had to distance themselves or become estranged.    Lindsay's book: Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents Natalie's book: The Joy of Saying No 'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/ Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast     

Transcribed - Published: 29 November 2024

Natalie chats with Lindsay C. Gibson, the author of million-copy selling 'Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents'. They delve into the characteristics of emotionally immature parents, the impact on their children, and the resulting emotional loneliness. They also discuss the importance of understanding these dynamics, the process of reparenting, and the nuances of emotional expression. The conversation highlights how these experiences shape adult relationships and the tendency towards people pleasing as a coping mechanism. They round out their chat with advice for people who want to break the cycle in their own parenting and for those who've had to distance themselves or become estranged.    Lindsay's book: Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents Natalie's book: The Joy of Saying No 'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/ Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast     

Transcribed - Published: 29 November 2024

Natalie chats with wellness coach (and former Baggage Reclaim student) Jolene Park about gray area drinking and understanding our relationship with alcohol.  How we consume and discuss alcohol has shifted dramatically over the last decade or so and more of us are reflecting on our relationship with alcohol but also sometimes unaware of how much the past - our emotional baggage - influences how and why we drink.  Learn about what gray area drinking is, why our relationship with alcohol, including how it affects us, doesn't fit neatly into the two buckets of 'those who can handle alcohol' and 'those who can't', and discover some first steps for reflecting on your own relationship with alcohol.  For more links and resources related to this episode, check out the shownotes.    'Reclaimed' membership: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/reclaimed/ Work with me: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/consultations/ Baggage Reclaim: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk  Shop courses and books: https://store.baggagereclaim.com Sign up for my newsletter: https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/newsletter/ Leave a voice note: https://www.speakpipe.com/baggagereclaim  Support the podcast and leave a tip: https://baggagereclaim.ck.page/products/podcast     

Transcribed - Published: 15 November 2024

Natalie's joined by her brother Richard again for a follow-up episode to discuss how their upbringing created a habit of wondering if there's something about them that makes them 'not good enough' or causes people to mistreat them or bad things happen - and how they're making strides in healing that narrative and taking care of themselves.  'Reclaimed' membership | Work with me | Baggage Reclaim | Shop | Sign up for my newsletter Leave a voice note | Support the podcast and leave a tip         

Transcribed - Published: 1 November 2024

After twenty months, Natalie is delighted to be back! In this episode, she shares a bit about her journey to this point as well as what led to the decision to return, plus she shares her plans for the podcast going forward.  And yes, the title of this episode was inspired by Mark Morrison's iconic 'Return of the Mack'.  

Transcribed - Published: 18 October 2024

Have you ever known that a loved one is holding back parts of themselves and essentially lying to you but they won't talk to you about it? Well, this is what happened with Natalie and her brother for over twenty years. In this episode, they sit down and share the story of what happened when he could finally be honest with her, the impact of generational trauma, and what happened when they accidentally discovered they'd both been lied to for over forty years about a crucial aspect of their childhood.  Note: there are a couple of 'naughty' words, just in case you're listening in the vicinity of little ears. 

Transcribed - Published: 18 October 2024

In the final episode of the podcast, Natalie is joined by her husband Em where they chat, answer listener questions, and say goodbye to this show which has been such a huge part of her life. Natalie's Substack The Joy of Saying No: A Simple Plan to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaim Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want is out now. Purchase it from your favourite bookseller. Shownotes

Transcribed - Published: 3 February 2023

Natalie shares some of the realisations she's made after making a big decision. The Joy of Saying No: A Simple Plan to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaim Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want

Transcribed - Published: 20 January 2023

In the final episode of 2022, Natalie shares a deleted chapter from her forthcoming book, The Joy of Saying No. She breaks down how, to escape the chains of the roles we play and trying to keep up with our and other people's often unrealistic expectations and projections, we might act out behind the scenes, go rogue on the version of ourselves that people have come to expect from us, lash out, or experience the toll of the chronic stress of our people-pleasing habit. Pre-order The Joy of Saying No: A Simple Plan to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaim Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want in audiobook, hardback, and ebook formats. https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/joy-of-saying-no-book/ Not sure what "pre-order" means and why it matters? Check out my handy video.

Transcribed - Published: 16 December 2022

Natalie explains why our biggest imperative post-breakup isn't to be bosom buddies with our ex and how we don't need to force ourselves to be friends if we're not ready yet or we don't *want* to.

Transcribed - Published: 2 December 2022

Natalie shares an exclusive excerpt from her forthcoming book The Joy of Saying No. Pre-order your copy in audiobook, hardback and ebook formats.

Transcribed - Published: 18 November 2022

Natalie breaks down why saying we're harsh/hasty/hypervigilant/picky leads to us ignoring, dismissing and overriding ourselves.

Transcribed - Published: 4 November 2022

Natalie talks about the importance of distinguishing between anger and disappointment to take better care of ourselves and start moving forward. Pre-Order The Joy of Saying No. Bookshop.org | Amazon

Transcribed - Published: 21 October 2022

Some of what we force ourselves to do, silence and tolerate are forms of insane politeness and toxic professionalism. Natalie breaks down what these are, why we do it, and why we've got to stop harming ourselves in the name of these social masks.

Transcribed - Published: 7 October 2022

In the first episode following Natalie's summer break, she talks about knowing when it's time to fold on a relationship that isn't truly right for us. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 23 September 2022

In this replay episode, Natalie explains why those habits that leave you doubting and disliking yourself and breaching your boundaries are a sign that you're over-responsible. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 9 September 2022

In this replay episode, Natalie breaks down why repeat frustrations and challenges occur and shares three key questions we can ask ourselves to break the cycle. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 26 August 2022

In this replay episode, Natalie delves into what it means to outgrow a friendship, why it happens, and also why we need to be careful of assumptions and judgements that might cause us to end a friendship unnecessarily. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 12 August 2022

In this replay episode, Natalie examines our relationship with rest because so many of us have internal debates about taking time off, whether for a break, pleasure, or to allow ourselves to recover from illness and burnout. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 29 July 2022

Natalie shares her thoughts on love, loving yourself, and why we don't need to have good thoughts and feelings *all the time* or be 'healed' to experience more loving relationships. This episode was recorded at The International Women's Podcast Festival in partnership with Pinterest on June 18th, 2022. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 15 July 2022

A big part of being more boundaried is knowing the difference between doing things from a place of desire versus doing them from a place of obligation. Natalie shares the insights she learned from a recent decision where she's deviated from her own and other people's expectations. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 1 July 2022

Natalie shares what she's learned from a recent 27-day rollercoaster ride of anxiety and worry about a family member's health.

Transcribed - Published: 24 June 2022

Natalie talks about the importance of representing yourself--showing up, speaking up and stepping up for who you are. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 17 June 2022

Natalie explains why our need to be perceived as 'good' and even beyond reproach creates problems for some of the people around us. Book your tickets for the live show of the podcast on Saturday, 18th June. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 10 June 2022

After receiving a lot of requests for her to talk about the topic, Natalie delves into why affairs happen and the importance of challenging some of the misconceptions about affairs that tend to assume that a person only cheats because their partner and relationship aren't 'good enough'.

Transcribed - Published: 3 June 2022

Natalie talks about how dropping hints about our discontent with someone by making a statement with our behaviour tends to lead to that person not picking up on our message and creates more problems than it solves.

Transcribed - Published: 27 May 2022

In this week's episode, Natalie talks about why it's important to accept and respect it when somebody says that they can't be in a relationship with us. No matter how we feel or them behaving in what we perceive to be relationship-y ways, if actions and words don't match, we've got a problem.

Transcribed - Published: 20 May 2022

Prompted by messages from people claiming that they seem to only feel confident dating or being in relationships with those who are 'below' their level, Natalie explores what this actually means (and what it doesn't!!) and why we do it in the first place.

Transcribed - Published: 13 May 2022

It can be bloody infuriating when someone makes a mistake or does us wrong and they refuse to acknowledge or take responsibility. But plenty of us don't even know what the hell taking responsibility means, so Natalie breaks it down in this week's episode. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 6 May 2022

Natalie talks about how when we give too much--yes, there is such a thing!--we're really not 'giving' at all. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 29 April 2022

Natalie talks about the comments parents make that suggest that we're not meeting their expectations and that they're disappointed with our life choices. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 22 April 2022

Natalie talks about why we surprise ourselves and others by losing our temper and behaving uncharacteristically and how we can navigate ourselves away from being tipped over the edge. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 1 April 2022

It's been five years since Natalie's father died, and she's got some things to share about grief and anger, including why we don't have to perform our feelings for people or withhold our grief to pussyfoot around others. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 25 March 2022

Natalie delves into the topic of core 'directional' values and why they matter for compatibility in our relationships and our overall sense of well-being.

Transcribed - Published: 18 March 2022

Natalie talks about how when keep going back on ourselves about something that causes us pain and discomfort, a part of us is afraid of what being successful at getting out of that relationship or situation would mean. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 11 March 2022

Sometimes we blame our intuition and don't feel as if we can trust it or ourselves. Natalie explains why our intuition isn't wrong, including how sometimes we weren't listening to our intuition in the first place. Get 30% of The Intuition Sessions short course with the code 'podcast'. Instagram | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 4 March 2022

Natalie talks about why it can be problematic when we question or belittle another person's fear of something and why focusing on how 'good' we think we are or the 'good things' we think we've done stops us from respecting why the person is afraid. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 25 February 2022

The Tinder Swindler, Sweet Bobby, Love Fraud, and more. After watching and listening to a host of scam-related shows, Natalie shares what she's observed about the pattern of scammers, including what can make us more receptive to being drawn in. Instagram | Break The Cycle Online Course | Blog | Shop

Transcribed - Published: 18 February 2022