I'm Natalie Lou and you're listening to the baggage reclaim sessions.

Hello hello. How are you doing?

When we hear terms like dating beneath you, punching below you,

punching below your weight,

dating down,

dating someone who's not on your level,

it's easy to get our backup. And this is understandable. These are

widely used terms that are assumed to be about some people are better and others are less than by society's

standards. It speaks to our feelings, beliefs and attitudes around class, race, money, intellect, and of course beauty standards and attractiveness.

It speaks to our biases, including what might be some of our isms and phobias.

The reality is that some people do date and forge relationships with a mentality of seeing certain people as being beneath them.

They are the ones who say, I'm a 10 and they're a 5, or you can't afford me, or two blue collar for me, or literally they're

beneath me.

There are also, however, people who date and forge relationships where often from relatively early on, they start saying stuff like,

you're too good for me, or wind so not on the same level or where people make comments like you're

punching above your weight aren't you mate and actually there are plenty of

people who don't think about people and relationships in terms of levels, but who

are subjected to scrutiny and really quite inappropriate comments from others.

They will experience being openly questioned about why, for instance, their partner is

with them based on perceived attractiveness, weight, race, job or background

differentials. For instance, I remember listening to an entrepreneur and influencer talk about the comments she received when people would

see her husband with his six-pack and her with her bigger body. The fat phobia but also this assumption that a person who looks like him had no business being with someone like her was insane. But let's be real, haven't we all at one

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