Page 7

Summer Time Sadness Jackie has started her solo journey into Love Island USA S7 a dawg in each hand, while MJ's havin' the exact opposite time and is descending into his Summer of Madness with two schedule free kids, The VERY young and VERY hip MJ crashed his brother and besties 20yr college reunion last weekend, and it had him realizin' that time does indeed keep on slip-slip-slippin'! They're already kickin' Love Islanders off for bein' racist and it makes you wonder what kind of vettin are they actually doing. Not to mention the interesting bestiality factoids another contestant was throwin' down, BUT THEY WERE WROOOOOONG (thankfully)!!!! Candace Cameron Bure is afraid of scary movies and Liquid Death beverages opening demonic portals and its absolutely insane AND there's audio proof of it! There's a cute Variety profile on The Gog and Aimee Lou Wood but everyone's tryin' to make it weird again, Katy Perry tried to be a Werner Herzog and brought a little girl on stage to confuse and terrify her by offering the child her shoe to eat, the Brooke Shields podcast interview that's causing a ruckus has been taken down without anyone saying anything. Olivia Munn says she doesn't like Ms Rachel 'cause kids songs are annoying and it blew up into something more, now everyone's having to be like 'STAHP.' Jackie and Geoff are havin' a literal Flag Day over the weekend where everyone's gonna dress as their favorite flag, which has Jackie feelin' Argentinean. Mileys all over the PR cycle for her new album, which Jackie says is more lowkey, but Miley is also now dealing with a dumb comment she made about Jojo Siwa as well. Tom Cruise got into the Guinness book of world records for the most burning parachute jumps from an individual helicopter, 16, but that doesn't mean all of them are worth watching... Speakin of Cruise, MJ has spread the world of his fish fuckin' to a trusted friend. A far too concerned mother shamed a man on social media for seeing Lilo and Stich alone, Jackie reports back that the The Phoenician Scheme is good, and MJ has begun The Rehearsal, all that and more on this weeks Second Helpings! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 13 June 2025

This weeks SLUMBA PARTAH is about to get LITIGIOUS as our FIRST TIME GUEST (and resident BOY OF SUMMA) Seena Ghaznavi is here to give you all the unsolicited, probably won't hold up in court, free legal advice your little listener ears can handle! So grab your favorite Pilot G2 and manilla folders as we get into the lowdown 'bout Justin Baldoni's countersuit gettin' thrown out and what that REALLY means for the Blake Lively case (regardless of what Baldoni's team says), Jackie briefly gushes about Predator from Predator, and the magic of THC drink powder as well as SUMMER DRANK CHAT. MJ gets Seena's opinion on Brooklyn Beckham being mad at knighted father and uber rich mom for being jealous that his wife's family is richer than them or somethin' like that, AND SPEAK OF NEPO BABIES, alot more of them are droppin' their famous last names. The TSA reminds everyone that Costco cards are not a form of legal identification, then onto THE LIST of '21 celebrity facts that are like really really really really really really really really really really really R E A L L Y shocking', the Blindz, and Jackie's Snackies from 1:03:57.658 - 1:11:50.507 with MJ's Minute Munchies @ 1:04:47.153! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 12 June 2025

It's time for some more slippy sloppy Second Helpings as Large Adult Choir Member Jackie Zebrowski brings us up to date on any, and all, things happening with her newest obsession because she's a Choir Girl now, and MJ loves that for her. Then we're jumpin' RIGHT into 'Hereditary' as MJ gives his breakdown on how extra NOT to watch 'Hereditary', with many a SPOILER to beLISTEN from 9:00.279 til around 25:49.522 or so: LISTENER BEWARE, YOU'RE IN FOR A SPOILER SCARY. Jackie highly suggests the Youtube series called 'Hereditary - The Complete Guide (Everything Explained)' by Youtuber Novum, which is a deep dive into the many little easter eggs and such. Eyerolls heard for miles as the genre 'Elevated Horror' enters the chat. MJ and Jackie want to 'BRIIIINNNGGG HHHEERRR BAAACCKKK', even if NO ONE WARNED JACKIE 'BOUT DEAD DAD UP TOP (except everyone totally did, but it was TOOOO LATE!). She's also super salty Henry and Ed got to interview the directors of previously mentioned movie for Side Stories, UGH. 'Eddington' is comin' out soon and it's gettin' weeeeeird reviews, but that won't stop Jackie's watchin' it! Jackie also received a wicked box of Aussie Snackies from some very nice people which leads to a MUTED JACKIE'S INTERNATIONAL SNACKIES @ around 1:10:54.579 til basically the end, but there's not really any munchin' noises. Arnold Schwarzenegger has been dubbed 'a weirdo' for talkin' 'bout his sons MAGNUM DONG as seen in 'The White Lotus' (S3, E1; 56min, 51sec), and MJ can't keep them HAWGS straight. Jackie started the Nick Kroll sitcom on Hulu called 'Adults' and it's makin' her reminisce with a tear in 'er eye, and THAT sends 'em BOTH down an "IM SORRY" bad youth behavior memory road. Then it's time to check in on them bitches from 'Secret Lives of Mormon Wives', AND HOW WILL MOMTOK SURVIVE THIS!!??! TLC's 'Polyfamily' is exactly what everyone expected. Kylie Jenner posted a specyspicy 'Sex and The City' meme 'bout B-Ball 'cause TimTims team lost, which bounces us right into some SPECTATOR SPORTS TALK! AND SO MUCH MOOOOOOOOOORE!!!! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 6 June 2025

UHOH! The Booger King is BACK and he has a VERY personal message; he heard each and every dirty little slander attack that Jake Young from Nerd Of Mouth did DARE TO SLING last episode, and this CHARACTER ASSASSINATION will NOT CONTINUE. He's here with aaaaallllllll the 'Tay News' that PROVES he is the one, true Swiftie regardless of the BRAINLESS rumors being spread by A TRAITOR! BIG TAY NEWS! She got her masters back, but that's got people feelin' duped, BUT ALSO the subpoena from Justin Baldoni has been DROPPED. Holden's Future Sight has been confirmed, Kylie Jenner is gettin' into the NITTY TITTY about them honkers in a response to a social media comment 'cause they asked, HILARIA Baldwin proved she's TOTALLY FINE with all the jokes online...by spending money and time to recreate fanart making fun of her and replying to nasty comments onli-WHENIAMTALKINGYOUARENOTTALKING, Jackie's tryin' to do her part to SAVE THE KIDS by buyin' up all them MARIHUANA contaminated Haribo gummies but then she realized they were the 'Fizzy Cola' ones and ew, no. But she is LOOOOOOSIN' IIIITTTTTT over all them Oreo collabs lately, including the Coke collab. A POX UPON WHOEVER SET UP THAT LITTLE GIRL WHO SANG 'MOANA' ACAPELLA ON THE DELAYED FLIGHT, AND JUSTICE FOR MS RACHEL. Then onto THE LIST of 'Famous Actors Who Were Killed, Kidnapped, or Otherwise Seriously Traumatized On MOVIESEEEETTSSS!!!', the Blindz, and Jackie's Snackies from 1:01:51.928 - 1:08:40.471 with MJ's Minute Munchies @ 1:06:19.679! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 5 June 2025

Gather 'round the dinner table, it's time to slop-up some SECOND HELPINGS, including MJ's watchin' "Full House" with their TWO YUTES and how "A Very Special Episode" led to them realizing the hand they've played in creating today's WOKE BULLSHIT generation, a parallel experience of finishin' "Andor" S2 and divin' STRAIGHT in C H R O N O L O G I C A L O R D E R to "Rogue One: A Star Wars Story" as they each launch into their "Star Wars" JOURNEY, Jackie's watched the first episode of "90 Day: Hunt for Love" (ANOTHER "90 Day" spinoff, but this time it's a DATING REALITY COMPETITION!), MJ can now humbly give AN ANSWER on if they can still enjoy "The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives" or are these women just suffering too much?, Jackie and Geoff discovered a youtuber that's her version of ASMR during a late-nite can'tsleepYoutubedive (audio included in episode around 22min; Snakealive - Grand Illusions), MJ's givin' their kids a 90's Summer, but NOT THAT KIND, "Everybody's Live with John Mulaney" has ended and Jackie must scream but she won't be screamin' any spoilers for "The Rehearsal" other than she says 'the ending is GENUIS', MJ is just watchin' the TikTok of Alexander Skarsgård and Pedro Pascal kissin', Dakota Fanning has a new movie about her goin' after TWO old men, the "Jurassic World Rebirth" popcorn bucket is.....something, MJ's gettin' hawt for sad boi Barry profile, Sydney Sweeney selling bath water soap with Dr. Squatch, Amy Poehler had the OG I C K from Tom Cruise because he did a bunch of flips in a movie and NOT because he's part of a bullshit cult that's slowly dying, Michelle Williams recently talked about how horrible it was living with Ryan Gosling during the shooting for "Blue Valentine", Kelly Ripa and Mark Consuelos are letting us all know they fuck....a lot.....again, Jackie is askin' MJ to watch "Hereditary" and asks WE ALL try to absorb the new "Pee-wee" doc before NEXT WEEK PLS, Hugh Jackman's divorce has finalized and here's hoping she takes him for it all, Dick Van Dyke just wants that sweet sweet release, AND SO MUCH MORE TO SLURP UP THIS WEEK! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 30 May 2025

This week Holden might not be here in the flesh, but he's here in the SWEAT as LPN's anime kawaii desu uwu nerdy bestie drops by the sleepover for the FIRST TIME EVER, Jake Young! Jackie's asking the serious questions regarding allegiances, until Jake admits he hasn't really been keeping in the loop, unless it's K-Pop! Then Jackie blows up Jake's spot with some Horse Girl discourse that lays out the many facets of said Horse Girls, including Uma Musume: Cinderella Gray, the bizarre horse girl idol anime based on a mobile game he's currently allowing into his brain. Then it's time for CRUISE CORNER, and how ole' Tom can't eat popcorn let alone digest it anymore, Miley Cyrus fillin' Kimmel in on Disney vs Nickelodeon Gays, Britney Spears lit a cig drunkenly on a plane then blamed her friend in her rambling Instagram caption, then on the list "Risky Casting Decisions That Ended Up Being Worth the Director's Heart Palpitations", the Blindz, and Jackie's Snackies from 1:11:55.600 -1:27:19.362! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 29 May 2025

This week on Second Helpings, Jackie and MJ reminisce about the classic "Daddy's Deli", MJ has a brief "Who's the Bitch?" in regards to Hilaria Baldwin, then it's on to the new season of "Secret Lives of Mormon Wives" and the embarrassment and sadness that's surely in store for the children in the series as they grow. Jackie gets into Season 2 of "Andor" to MJ's delight, Jackie breaks down how slippy sloppy the new "Dune" films are, HBO Max is HBO Max...again, TLC's new show on poly relationships is baaaaad, and Jackie encourages MJ to get onto "The Rehearsal" train. Tim Robinson delights with "Friendship", and MJ gives a breakdown of "Four Seasons" to Jackie who's throwin' out the totally not insane "Final Destination: Bloodlines" plus even more in this week's Second Helpings! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 23 May 2025

This week LPN's resident Big Sister Natalie Jean crashes the slumba parta to dish on what dance movies are and are NOT Real Dancer Approved, MJ is feelin' Pope-positive, and Jackie's jealous of Pope Bob's MEAT until she adjusts her crown and remembers WHO SHE IS. A Woman In Total Control (of) Hotdogs. Natalie introduces everyone to a new phrase while talkin' 'bout the controversy surrounding CANNES, which just leads to Jackie giving us a street phrase lesson no one wanted. Nuts out for the alpha male as the eternal question is asked; big testies or lil testies, which do they prefer? Jackie and Henry are trying to grief watch all the 'John Wick's without seeing the dog scene again BECAUSE IT DOES NOT NEED TO EXIST DEREK KOLSTAD, Jamie Lee Curtis got plastic surgery at 25 because some scumbag cinematographer sucks at his job and blamed her face instead of doing some self-reflection, MJ and Jackie suffered through all of 'Manual Not Included' SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO! And yes, they do in fact talk shit on you, HILARIA. Lotta people are still mad at Sarah Silverman, AND SO MUCH MORE! Then it's time for a list with a title longer than the list itself, 'Plot Driven Bits of Movie Trivia That'll Have Ur Mom Askin' 'Wait, What's Goin' On? I Thought He Was The GOOD GUY!?'', the Blindz, and a seriously savoryJackie's Snackies with MJ's Munchie Minute from 1:08:31.980 til 1:16:29.555! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 22 May 2025

This week Holden's back-back again, and he's thirsty for more LPN time as he and MJ try to keep Jackie sane after the very recent loss of her father, so it's time to goss' 'bout the fact that Hilaria Baldwin has come out as having a very special brain which is why she pretend to be from EL SPAAAAAIINNOOOO, MJ started 'Manuel Not Included' and it's causin' them great mental distress but now they're wondering if it's all a conspiracy to let Alec Baldwin do a silly racist accent in interviews?!?!, Lea Michele makes claim she can read, but the lady doth protest TOO MUCH, Jackie's the only one of the three watching the new season of 'The Rehearsal' and she's not sure what the show is anymore, but speaking of awkward humor, she highly suggests Tim Robinson's new movie 'Friendship'. China's first corgi police dog is in trouble AGAIN and no one can remember who picked this article, Taytay got served with a subpoena in the ongoing LivelyxBaldoni case and it's got MJ firing shots at the Beyhive with even MORE conspiracies!, there's a '10 Things I Hate About You' musical comin' to Broadway bein' scored by the one and the only Carly Rae Jepsen, and MUCH MORE! Then a list featuring an actor who ate real dog poop on camera and 29 other HORRIFYING BEHIND THE SCENES THAT LITERALLY MADE ME SICK TO MY STOOOOMACH (per the list title), the Blindz, and a totally remote Jackie's Snackies with MJ's Munchie Minute, and Holden Likes to Eat Two Things....PUSSY & SNACKS from 1:07:03.829 til 1:16:42.609! HAIL HENRY THOMAS ZEBROWSKI SENIOR! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 15 May 2025

May brings spring break showers for all your tap dancin' needs during Network Vacay! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 9 May 2025

The networks on vacay, so that means it's time to grab your studded belt, oversized shorts, and sweatbands to dive into the post-911 world of the very serious and grown up teenage versions of Jackie and MJ, in 2002! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 8 May 2025

Jackie wants to watch current TV, but she's trapped in the early 2000's Housewives reality and MJ really has no reason to exist now that 'The Baldwins' are done...at least until 'Secret Lives of Mormon Wives' comes back. While discussing how there's nothing to watch (except 'Andor'), they realize there's actually a couple reality shows dropping including 'Polyfamily' (a listener has written in with regards to how TLC might not give it the best edit) and a new 90 Day dating reality show! Speaking of TLC reality shows, there's now ANOTHER set of Australian identical twins that speak at the same time like healthy adults do. Jackie's ready to blast past aaaaalllll that celeb goss' to give praise to the hero we all need (except he shouldn't have done it in a school zone, come on dude). Raven-Symoné had Nick Cannon on her podcast where she basically just brags about being rich and Nick Cannon confirms he's got them danglers insured for TOO MUCH, which callin' all BALL LAWYERS for the logistics on insuring them testies. Haley Joel Osment got drunk and started screaming antisemitic slurs, bloated corpse Mickey Rourke releases gases to let 'Big Brother' know that they should have KNOWN what they were getting into when hiring him and is SUEING because they hurt HIS snowflake feelings, JoJo Siwa dumped her girlfriend at the after party for 'Celeb Big Brother UK', Vinny Guadagnino is gross but he said he made a ton of money being a Chippendales dancer, Martha Stewart did Martha when asked about Meghan Markle's new show, MJ hears the critics on making fun of Meghan Markle....but they're still gonna do it, Jackie has finally learned that money can't buy ya class, elegance is earned. Jackie watched the movie 'Street Trash', and MJ had a blast watching 'Black Bag' in the THEATRE, Jackie has some reflections on if it's aliens OR space that scares her more, the first episode of the current season of 'Black Mirror' is DEVASTATING, MJ started watching 'You' again, Jackie says the new season of 'Last of Us' is vvvv good, MJ just learned they share the same wedding anniversary (happy anniversary!) with Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson, Robert De Niro's daughter just transitioned and he's showing his support, the headlines are now full of celeb parents doing typical parenting things like Serena Williams teaching her kid about allowances and stuff, Beyoncé's rarely seen itty bitty son showed up at her Cowboy Carter tour, and SO MUCH MORE!!! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 2 May 2025

This week Jackie and MJ are joined by LPN's Louisiana Lovin' Amber Nelson to goss' 'bout the cheapest steak (and possibly worst bathroom) on Bourbon Street, MJ's fruitless trip to a Flatbush Taco Bell, and Jackie drops the info on Tbell's new chicken based foods, which leads to the concerning news of Subway's nachos. Gwyneth Paltrow is adding a microscopic amount of pasta to her diet and the world is in SHOCK, videos from her new tour reveal that Katy Perry really should have spent more time on her stage show instead of going to space OR that she's been replaced by a replicant, Jackie asks for Amber's opinion on Selena Gomez and Benny Blanco's relationship after their recent prom themed photoshoot, and Amber forces Jackie to relive her prom trauma, Pedro Pascal roasted the genital obsessed JK Rowling over a very embarrassing gloating Instagram post, and then a list filled with Celeb facts that might sound fabricated but they're TOTALLY NOT, the Blindz and Jackie's Snackies with MJ's Munchie Minute from 1:00:27 til 1:08:48! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 1 May 2025

Jackie and MJ are back for this post Springsgiving Second Helpings! Talk 'bout America's Psychic Challenge and the beautifully tacky psychic and magic docuseries of the 90's of 2000's, then Jackie get's into how hawt she got for the double dose of Michael B. Jordon in Sinners, but before she can finish MJ moves things along to Season 2 of Andor on Disney+. Elizabeth Hurley opens up about her relationship with Billy Ray Cyrus and her... close working relationship with her OWN son, a whole new swam of celeb books are headed our way, and MJ and Jackie break down Kim K totally understated Easter celebration for her kids, that really shows she's just like us. Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 25 April 2025

This week MJ and Jackie are joined by Ham Daddy himself Ed Larson to discuss that hot goss', including Steven Tyler's daughter ratting him out when it comes to the reason for all those bandanas, but the true question is how did no one see him shoveling pills into his gaping maw on stage, Jackie and Ed get into them ole Tallahassee days, and Ed reveals that he's hung with John Stamos a bunch, John Stamos put on a bald cap in solidarity of Uncle Joey because ya' can't shave hair plugs! Gayle King has now beat Katy Perry does dumbest crew member and now we're apparently putting trash in space ala a Futurama plot line and Wendy's as well as Martha Stewart joins in on with everyone on bullying Katy Perry until Daddy Bezos asked them to stop. Lady Gaga dropped a new album but tickers are INSANE, Jackie hits us with a list full of actors everyone thought were gonna be tooooo ooooolllllddd, then in a bonus list, Eddie reveals the top celebs he's gotten high with, then its time for BLIIINDZ and Jackies Snackies, with 7Up Endless Summer, as well as regional chips and a dip recipe from a listener, and a call for YOUR regional snacks! Are you in Florida!? Eddie may be headed your way! Check out his tour dates on EddieTunes.com! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 24 April 2025

This week on Second Helpings MJ fills Jackie in on how they have personally taken the Second Helpings lifestyle to heart, and Jackie is preppin' for the union of Friendsgiving and 4/20 on Sunday! Jackie reveals her plans for reeducation of the youth via Forrest Gump. Gayle King is now lord of space, and Jackie gives a rundown of the new season of "Black Mirror." MJ and Jackie are hackin' through "Hacks", and John Mulaney has a new live talk show on Netflix, and Jackie ponders why "The Accountant 2" got made. Jojo Siwa is doin' great despite the recent run in with a tattered leather jockstrap, which leads to a convo about pronouns, and Jackie gives a revew of "Warfare" and MJ asks for suggestions on what to see in theatre, and Adam pops in to help! Cameron Diaz shares some dirty secrets, Jackie gets spooked, AND MORE!!! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 18 April 2025

LPN Funhouse's very own HIGH Chancellor, and resident Male Feminist, Holden McNeely crashes the SLUMBA PARTAH to goss' 'bout women goin' to space, Jackie's pro-anything that gest Katy Perry as far as away from Earth as POSSIBLE and Kesha seems to be feelin' the same way, speaking of which Katy Perry Warning at 6:55.211 and it's VERY STEM Science GIRL POWER, but back on this beautiful blue marble it's finally OVER, 'The Baldwins' season (series? lord hopes) finale plays on just in time for COOOOOACHEEELLLLAAAA! With jump suited Benson Boone bringing out, like, some dude named Brian Mayes? or whatever and they played 'Bohemian Rhapsody' then The Internet got upset people didn't know who the crusty old man was, HOLDEN IS ALMOST ONE OF 'THE SCUNGILLED', Gaga's new album has Jackie screaming praise about it at strangers in the street and her set was just as impressive, Holden's suggestin' all the BLACKPINK solo albums, Bernie Sanders being at Coachella WASN'T a sundandrugfueled hallucination, Aimee Lou Wood was seen crying at Coachella and rumor has it that it was SNL bein' RUDE, Jackie tried both 'White Lotus' coffee creamers which leads to the reveal she was gonna be the new face of Crockpot campaign until OOPS a plot point on 'This Is Us' KILLED that. Then it's time for a list of bizarre, true stories behind the most popular music EVAAAAAAAAAAA, 'LPN FUNHOUSE' RETURNS MAY 1ST FOR BIG PAPA HENRY'S BDAY and it is going to be upsetting, Jackie's Snackies warning at 1:00:04.550 til 1:09:06.926, AND SO MUCH MORE ON THIS WEEK'S P7VR!! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 17 April 2025

'Confidently Wrong' Jackie Zebrowski and MJ Knefel have now realized their mistake regarding The Hanks Children, but that ain't enough to make them wanna push through the sadness to read the newly announced CRUSHING memoir that will NOT be on Celeb Readies, 'The Baldwins' are filling Jackie with a poison that the only cure is to spew it forth as they discuss HILARIA being a True Blue American by pushing the age-old capitalist idea of monetizing every hobby you ever have on your kids, and working Alec into an early(ish) grave while they finally show one of their helpers faces on screen, Mickey Rourke continues being a disgusting bigot on 'Big Brother (UK)' as he harasses JoJo Siwa and lucks out that she knows throwing a right hook on a 72 year old would (unjustly) get blasted everywhere, 'The Naked Gun' remake trailer looks more like an action film with Liam Neeson in the lead and Jackie is PUMPED, there is an absolute abomination against mankind itself currently available for the weekend at ONE specific, off the path Pizza Hut in NYC and MJ is begging for someone to take that Plant Based Gelatinous Substance bullet for 'em, Jackie and Geoff raced through season 3 of 'Love on the Spectrum', the charge nurse on 'The Pitt' has Jackie and MJ turnin' into neckbeards like werewolves in the full moonlight, they're both finally divin' into 'Hacks' and that only took basically everyone telling them how good it was, ALERT ALERT OLIVE GARDEN HAS BEEN DETHRONED AS TOP CASUAL DINING SPOT IN U.S. ALERT ALERT Olympus has fallen, discussion of the discourse around 'White Lotus' right now, Coffee Mate made sure to let everyone know THEY didn't know about the ending before they collabed for a Piña Colada Liquid Non-Dairy Creamer, 'Bad Influence: The Dark Side of Kidfluencing' is absolutely not for everyone but everyone SHOULD be thinking about the subject, Jackie really enjoyed 'Everybody's Live with John Mulaney', AND SO MUCH MORE! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 12 April 2025

UH-OH! This week's sleepover is about to get a LIL' BITCHY UP IN HERE as LPN's resident 'Bitch From Another W.I.T.C.H' Kara Klenk drops by to reminisce of days gone by spent with her now husband while MJ's reminiscing about their brothers old, toxic, rooftop pisshole in NYC, and Jackie's OBSESSED with the new 'Lady Gaga Fun Mouth Sounds' album! But speaking of toxic pissholes, in a move which surely leaves everyone grosser and in need of a shower, Rumer Willis opens up about still taking baths with her sisters, Steve Irwin's son, Robert Irwin, is 21 years old now and wants everyone to see his anaconda. While on the subject of the lineage of beloved TV hosts, Kara has hot goss' on Neil 'Smokedagrass' Tyson getting a much needed HUMBLIN' during 'Celebrity Jeopardy', then it's time for some 'White Lotus' spoilers! Starting around 24:13 and ending around 47:25, next up is a list of 'Celebrity Parenting Rules That Make Either A Ton of Sense Or Very Little Sense', BLINDZ with 'Quickdraw Jackie' - the fastest gossip slinger of the West! Finally, misophoniacs and anti-Kardashianists beware, you're in for a scare! Jackie's Snackies is back and runs from 1:09:04.396 til about 1:21:04.541. All that, AND MORE on this week's P7VR! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 10 April 2025

Jackie's teeth Tony is a whistlin', parentfluencers are shillin' a 3 figure box that tells your kids a story without a screen (aka a RADIO), Chappell Roan is PREACHING 'bout havin' kids too young, and the newest Baldwin episode is literally just about a rug and not worth missing the opera for, so Jackie gives a 5 second (too long possibly) synopsis. 'The Studio' is great and filled with stars, and worth payin' for Apple TV, it's dropping weekly and there's 3 eps right now. Jackie recommends 'Midcentury Modern', a new sitcom on Hulu starring Nathan Lane that's essentially 'Golden Girls' with gay men. 'The Pitt' demands your full attention and your full tear ducts RIGHT. NOW. but 'Death of a Unicorn' DOES NOT. There's 4 Beatles movies bein' created by Sam Mendez that all intersect for a "bingeable" theatre experience, which leads to a possible sighting of a giant Liverpool lap lizard, a film based on Britney Spear's memoir 'The Woman Inside Me', and JoJo Siwa is pulling a Gene Simmons with a personal assistant VIP package, but at least her comes with a ticket to the show. Mike White of 'White Lotus' has kicked up a mess by going on terminal weirdo and transphobe Andrew Sullivan's podcast, 'Love on the Spectrum' Season 3 dropped and accidentally kept Jackie from sleepin', Cardi B's kid drew on her $60,000 bag BECAUSE CELEBS ARE JUST LIKE US! Rambo nearly ruined an impromtru Jackie's Snackies as his final act before he started checkin' Sundae the Black Lab's Instagram from the sky, Jackie goes over a list of April Fool's Day products, but sadly Snooki's fried pickle ice cream isn't one of them. Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 4 April 2025

This week's slumba partah is being crashed by Page 7's big sister and resident DJ Tanner, Natalie Jean as we dive right into 'Hollywood Demons', '7th Heaven's' pedo problem and the true wronged party in 'Mrs. Doubtfire', the indoctrination of Disney Vacation eps of 90's sitcoms, Amy Sherman-Palladino had a mysterious event that Jackie and Natalie chose to skip for fear of an 'Eyes Wide Shut' situation that turned out to be a panel discussion with some of the heads of the creators work which leads to some ghost fuckin' talk that has Natalie accessing her inner weeb because TECHNICALLY CASPER IS 200 YEARS OLD, Andrew Lloyd Webber created the Phantom sequel no one asked for, Fran Drescher has a hotation and Jackie used to get sandwiches from a killer, Chet Hanks and his band have put out a song and video 'Something Out West' that Jackie gives a general taste of, Momtok Talk now has MJ emersed in Ruby Frankie, then a list of 'Adults In Teen Movies Who Were Right!', followed by BLINDZ that no one wants to believe (UGH, LOVE IS DEAD), and then it's time (1:14:26 / 1 hr 14 min 26 sec TIL 1:23:24 / 1 hr 23 min 24 sec) to be Snackfluenced by Jackie's Snackies! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 3 April 2025

GET UR BIBS ON AND GRAB A SPOON, Jackie and MJ are back to serve up some sloppy, slimy leftovers to (hopefully) satisfy all your quivering, begging earholes! MJ's livin' their best life with back to back 'The Pitt' episodes and 'Temptation Island' (2025 The Reboot) per Jackie's suggestion. White Lotus was an experience for all those watching and got everyone sayin' 'I've been fucked up....But I ain't ever been THAT fucked up', but Gud Pud Jackie probably enjoyed it ps SPOILERYNESS STARTS AROUND 11:40 til 27:00 (I think that's it?) In a similarly mortifying fashion, Gwen Stefani is partnering with a bunch of other uber religious celebs to release a Jesus app called 'Hallow' that'll help you 'STAY PRAYED UP' with Mark Wahlberg!.......for $9.99 a month. MJ loves Season 1 'Severance' and Jackie's saying Season 2 is just as good, regardless of reviews. The most recent season of 'Love Is Blind' has conservatives foaming at the mouth because of two female contestants drawing the line at hateful religions, a listener gave Jackie a complex by letting them know that Benny Blanco is a bad bad man because he....ruined Maroon 5? More? Sabrina Carpenter keeps unjustly getting shit as well as praise for being 'too sexy', and if that ain't just a summation of being a female presenting human for the past ~12000 years. This delves into a deeper conversation of why the responsibility of raising a generation of girls was placed upon a teenage Britney Spears shoulders when all she wanted to do was sing and dance. Sabrina also collaborated with the one and only Dolly Parton to release a new version of 'Please, Please, Please' with a MV that tells the rest of the tale from the first video! Jennifer Coolidge is braggin' 'bout gettin' laid from her acting roles and now she's attracted to deeply unavailable meeeeeeen. Jackie gives a positively glowing review of 'Best in Show' with suggestion to watch any movie by Christopher Guest, and the bad reviews just keep rollin' in as 'The Baldwins' puts everyone to sleep. And it's not just from the nitrous from their child armies pediatric dentist office. Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 28 March 2025

This week on Page 7, Jackie and MJ are joined by LPN's very own political papa Travis Irvine! MJ asks Travis how he deals with the politics right now and not wanting to die, and Travis reveals his secrets! Stanley Tucci got asked by delish if he could only dine at one chain restaurant for the rest of his life and he said "I'd rather not" cause he hates 'em all. Tina Fey was a guest on Amy Poehler's podcast and brought up how much it bothers her when rich people have side hustles that are just cash grabs and erryone is talkin' bout it. A dying man got his wish to be buried in a Snickers inspired coffin that say's "I'M NUTS" on the side, and Jackie learns of a startling new study on hot dogs. A List full of weird fears, the Blinds, AND GET YA CRUNCH ON WITH JACKIES SNACKIES! Plus so much more! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 27 March 2025

Jackie and MJ are back again for a Second Helpin'! This week, HILARIA berates her husband publicly in an attempt to be cute but definitely comes off pompous and MEAN, then she uses the 15 year old sister of her daughter's friend to let the world know her dropping the accent is Code Switching. Geoff introduced Jackie to Jack Reacher with 3 words 'Big Beefy Boys', and keeping with the theme of masculinity, MJ is trying the British police procedural 'Adolescents' and it's not fun. at all. TLC is dropping trailers for a new show called 'Poly Family' but it's not out until April! MJ also checked out 'Heretic', warns all airport travelers they will too, and MJ attempts to sell Jackie on 'Disco Foot' much to Bully Jackie's chagrin, plus even more! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 21 March 2025

Big Bro Henry is crashing the slumba par-tay this week as MJ and Jackie kick off the show with HILARIA verbally berating her man-child for speaking while she speaks, HAWT FLASHES is about dog life extending medicine that Henry is already well aware of, allegedly Meryl Streep and Martin Short are dating and Henry DEMANDS THE TAPE! Tori Spelling is saying the kid she has massage her while nude is the reincarnation of her father which feels very healthy and normal, Henry's placing bets about Chet Hanks AND gives some true crime advice about Gene Hackman and his wife's recent deaths. Finally, a List filled with celebrity side projects that were confusing and insane, the blindz, and then get ready for MOUF SOUNDS cause Jackie's Snackies is back! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 20 March 2025

MJ and Jackie are back and crankin' out new themes for Second Helpings! Rewatching the 'Step By Step' theme and reading 'The Baby-Sitters Club' to their own child has got MJ thinkin' 'bout millennial children of divorce, Jackie says the 'Love is Blind' finale had her in tears, Jackie prematurely turned off American Murder: Gabby Petito while watching it with MJ and now she's prematurely doing something else while thinking of the buffbutch FBI agent featured in it, Tori Spelling apparently doesn't drink water and you can definitely tell, and Gene Simmons is charging fans over $10,000 dollars to be his personal assistant for the day, Ben Affleck seems to only know 2 women and they're both named Jennifer, Hailey Bieber did a photoshoot that got her roasted, because everyone missed the point, and Justin ripped a bong while riding a bike. Jackie went to see 'Mickey 17' and was surprised that they didn't completely love it, and over in Baldwin corner, Alec and HILARIA launched the grand reopening of the Planet Hollywood in New York Time Square last Tuesday and still continue to be generally unlikeable on 'The Baldwins', MJ is finally gettin' into 'Severance', Jackie is caught up on 'The Traitors' season 3, recommends Doctor Odyssey for that sweet sweet white noise, and even more on this week's Second Helpings! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 14 March 2025

This week on Page 7 VR MJ and Jackie are reunited with the dulcet toned Marcus Parks, on the 15th(!!) anniversary of the network, to goss' 'bout his concerns over Holden's taste in music (or lack thereof), The Wiggles staying power as they collab with Orville Peck on a new song called 'Friend of Dorothy", Marcus gets to be among the first to hear the new HAWT FLASH song, Adrien Brody tossin' gum and paintin' sicc a$$ guns, Jackie enters a tear soaked journey into The Pitt, Marcus gives an update on his 90 Day and Reality TV viewing habits as well as how much Reality TV has changed since his time on P7 (or even just in the last 2 years), someone or something in California wants everyone to eat Nutria and we've got some thoughts on what's behind it, Marcus triumphantly sounds off THE LIST, which is full of discontinued fan favorite products, da Oscarz Edition Blindz, TW for misophonia as JACKIES SNACKIES RETURNS with special guest Marcus! That plus even more on this weeks' Page 7 VR! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 13 March 2025

Hopefully you didn't fill up at the Vow Renewal because it's time for a Second Helping! Jackie's Snackie's kicks off as Jackie makes the fabled trek back to TBell to get those sweet bday churros (after they both got too high and forgot earlier) and she's givin' them her GUSH of approval, it's time to catchup on OSCAR GOSS'! Conan was a great host, as expect, but the rest gave MID since everyone just decided to ignore the gendered elephant in the room, Adrien Brody should have just swallowed that gum, Jackie gives her approval to 'A Complete Unknown' after a very swaying Nardwuar interview with Timote, DEMI AND 'THE SUBSTANCE' WERE ROBBED, a highlight was Daniel Blumberg sassin' in their speech, and then Zoe Saldana put their foot in their mouth right after winning! And in non-Oscars related news, Chet Hanks put out 2 new pieces of media and we're all just waiting for the supercut of him from his new show (but he did get glowing reviews!) and this has Jackie waiting for him to rise from the ashes like the phoenix tattoo on Ben Affleck's back, each episode of 'The Baldwin's' is more upsetting than the last but MJ's decided they need to do some serious shadow work because the veneer is blinding and now everyone feels bad for Alec Baldwin and Hilaria is a villain, but it looks like the family of the WOMAN HE MURDERED haven't been swayed as they called their reality show 'SHAMELESS', Jackie's been watching 'Severance' season 2 with Geoff and it's sad but good, 'White Lotus' season 3 has them t h i r s t i n', 'Righteous Gemstones' is comin' back March 9th and Jackie wants to KISS 'EM ALL!, Jackie forced Geoff to watch 'With Love, Megan ' and it was so bad and so boring but Pam Anderson's is doing great, Flavor Flav is doing a 1-hour energy collab with 5-hour Energy for Daylight Savings Time, MJ's got some recs for a listener who wrote in, AND SO MUCH MORE! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 7 March 2025

This week on Page 7 VR, Jackie and MJ go on a Eras Tour through the past of Page 7 from the OG Marcus, Jackie, MJ lineup to the most recent hosts including the totally not dead Holden McNeely. Then it's time for a HOT FLASH! featuring the new Sabrina Carpenter and Dolly Parton collab, and a monkeys paw-esque wish that Dolly Parton never cry, Jackie brings her attempt at snackfluencing to the podcast with Jackie's Snackies™ and Post Malone's new Oreo flavor, MJ digs into the newest (repackaged) Kim K drama involving North, and middle school drama continues over at "Pod Meets World", another new segment that'll get ya slippin' and sliddin' and squirtin'! The Blindz return with promises of maybe lists to come, and even more on the first edition of Page 7 THE VOW RENEWAL! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 6 March 2025

It's Holden's last episode as co-host (for now) but he's still forcing his Taysession onto MJ and Jackie who are just doing their best to ignore an unannounced visit from Gronky while gossin' 'bout Meghan Markle being currently unable to sell her clothes because she didn't bother to make sure there wasn't already a brand by that name, a flashback to the apology Holden uses over and over and over, TSwift might not be friends with Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds anymore because SHE'S THE KHALEESI IN THIS RELATIONSHIP! There are rumors of trouble in Bikini Bottom, and that's got Holden wondering what celeb would MJ and Jackie leave their nine months pregnant (à la 'Junior') husbands Slater-style, Jackie and MJ are desperate to go to 'Swig' the soda and put SEVEN PUMPS IN THEM, every dude on the newest season of 'Love Is Blind' sucks except for Joey, Jackie and MJ talk about hanging at the mall and checkin' out the glory of Spencer's, a quick reminder of what Holden's funeral request entails so BUST OUT YOUR GRAVITY BONGS, and in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner #213 THE FINALE (for now): Did HILARIA swap out the prop gun for howusayREAL GUN?!?!!??! A Swift List in honor of Holden, Blindzzzz, Holden gets to be bathed in your kind shoutzzzzzz PLUS MOOOOOOREEEE!!!! WE LOVE YOU HOLDEN! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 27 February 2025

This week on Talkin' TV The Baldwins is unleashed on Max and everyone agrees it's everything wrong with reality tv (and that's really saying something), Holden finally enters the realm of self awareness and apologizes for things that haven't even been published yet, plus we are reminded that HILARIA trolls reddit for haters personal info. The Monkey (NOT THAT MONKEY MOVIE) is a gorey laughfest that finally allowed MJ to see the Nicole Kidman AMC ad. The Waitress is released as a filmed Broadway show on max with Sarah Auroraboreilles, and MJ watched the Gabby Petito doc on Netflix which is a chilling reminder of how plainly abuse can hide. Jackie is caught up on the newest season of Mythic Quest, White Lotus has Holden having to set a bedtime for him and Lex, but MJ has Jackie on HOLD because MJ has to HOLD for Gideon! Jackie is personally invested in Traitors and she's rootin' for a ladies downfall, Holden hasn't caught up on Love Is Blind but knows he wants more OOOOOLDS! The Baldwins - Max The Monkey - In the theatahhhhhhhh American Murder: Gabby Petito - Netflix Mythic Quest - Apple+ The Traitors Season 3 - Peacock Love is Blind Season 8 - Netflix Conclave - Peacock Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 26 February 2025

MJ is the Lisa Barlow of P7 this week after losing iPads AND precious precious water bottle on a family trip! Get your time at the opera in because The Baldwins are a comin' next Sunday, Jackie's upped her bitchiness with much success and the blessing of one Ed Larson, Hilaria has peepee stickers for her baby Balds, Tori Spelling shows she's just like us by revealing she gets nude and makes her son give her massages for an allowance, SNL 50 brings in all the greats for a massive live special, Benny Blanco gave Selena Gomez a trail of chips to a bath tub of queso in their HOME BATH TUB for Valentine's day...and in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner: Real Housewives of SLC and CLIMATE CHANGE?!?! Then a list filled with times that actors got away with shocking, disgusting, cruel, and dangerous things in the name of method acting, blindz and MOOOORE! p.s. stick around after the blindz for some very important newz! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 21 February 2025

This week on Talkin' TV Holden's been goonin' classic dad movies in his loneliness, Jackie's been feelin' like the baby in Eraserhead as she cries to the Content Gods for the blessing bestowed upon all and this includes starting down that slippery slope of Desperate housewives with season 1 and the 20+ year difference is JARRING, while MJ hasn't been alone in 168 hours but they did get to enjoy a P7 classic because Love Is Blind IS BACK! including all the bad men anyone could ask for (even after the production company was warned by many), everyone agrees they want to see 20's Jackie on Bad Girls Club, Sad Dad Time involves the major hits from the past year including Zone Of Interest (highly suggested to watch at this moment in time), Y2K, plus partials of Alien Romulus and Venom, Jackie and Geoff are blasting through I Think You Should Leave with Tim Robinson, there's a Tom Greenissance over on Amazon Prime that has reenforced Jackie's crush, White Lotus season 3; ep 1 has dropped, and SO MUCH MORE! Love is Blind Season 8 - Netflix Real Housewives of New York Seasons 1 and 2 - Peacock Zone Of Interest - Max Y2K - Amazon Prime Heart Eyes - IN THE THEATAHHHHH Alien: Romulus - Hulu I Think You Should Leave with Tim Robinson - Netflix This is the Tom Green Documentary - Amazon Prime White Lotus Season 3 - Max Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 19 February 2025

This week on Page 7 WE'RE GOSSIN' 'BOUT THE ONLY REASON TO WATCH THE SUPER BOWL; THOSE SILLY COMMERCIALS! Jackie's obsessed with Seal the literal seal, then Mormon-verse has everyone craving dirty soda, Holden got a taste of his own medicine when he just wanted to share a delightful young man with the wonderful twitch chat and everyone screamed how much he sucks AND HE'S MORMON, in more Superb Owl News Holden was decked out in his Red TSwift gear on the way to a party of Philadelphia fans and he got unjustly booed JUST LIKE HER! Travis Kelce showed up looking like a prequel Ron Burgundy while kissin' Presidential ass even tho that same man insulted HIS GIRLFRIEND, we're all hoping the Philadelphia Eagles will turn down that White House visit again, 'Montoya, Por Favor' explained (and it is NSFW). Kendrick Lamar has cast a pox upon Drake's household, and now there's measles breakouts at Drake's concerts, not to mention Kendrick's easter egg filled death blow of a halftime show (RIP Drake) absolutely did not disappoint and neither did the confused conservatives completely missing every point that was made because 'MURICA COLORS, and of course Drake is suing Kendrick's label because there's absolutely nothing else he can do. Puppy Monkey Baby made a brief appearance in an Instacart Super Bowl ad (to Jackie's true delight, and the world's absolute terror) with all the other forgotten horrors of the past, and finally after letting us all know how much he 'hates all fat bitches' (except Adele?????), and getting his website shut down for going full mask off with a true-blue swastika Adolf Hitler tribute shirt, Kanye FINALLY confirmed what we all had already known when it comes to his creeptastic relationship with walking coma victim Bianca Censori. Then in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner: Banksy's identity is TYRA BANKS(Y)!?, a list full of Out Of Touch Celebrities Who Clearly Live In A Separate Reality FROM OUR OWN, blindzzz4dayzzz, AND SO MUCH MOOOORE!!!! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 13 February 2025

This week on Takin' TV Holden, MJ, and Jackie discuss the cast of non book reading SINNERS known as the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City and Jackie makes plans to join once she's on husband three! The Traitors continues to bring the traitorin', and Hulden gets Hupooed by the "Special Look" of "A Complete Unknown" on Hulu. Things get soupy and sloppy in "Funeral Home of Horrors" on "The Curious Case Of..." and Jackie and MJ ask "why not just wait for the Docuseries?" when it comes to Netflix's "Apple Cider Vinegar." Holden's been watchin' for that White Bronco in "American Manhunt: OJ Simpson", and Jackie recommends "Common Side Effects" on Max, "Invincible" Season 3 on Amazon, dove deep on Leon the Lobster on Youtube! MJ readin' y'alls book recommendations, and Holden reveals his wife's startling diagnosis of being Handsome Podcast and Fortune Feimster-pilled! Real Housewives of Salt Lake City - Peacock The Traitors Season 3 - Peacock The Curious Case Of..... - Max Apple Cider Vinegar - Netflix American Manhunt: OJ Simpson - Netflix Common Side Effects - Max Invincible Season 3 - Amazon Prime The Family Upstairs by Lisa Jewell Fortune Feimster: Crushing It - Netflix Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 12 February 2025

This week on Page 7 IT'S TIME TO GOSS' 'BOUT THE GRAMMY'S!! including Jackie (finally) having her Taywakening even if the only thing TSwift won that night was Jackie's 'fitproval, Beyoncé won Best Country album much to her own surprise, Brother Eilish is setting a boundary everyone hopes more celebs will vocalize COUGHTAYLORCOUGH, quick breakdown on the difference between Record of the Year v. Song of the Year and MJ's calling for Tarif's on Drake. Doechii came, Doechii saw, Doechii conquered, shout outs to Chappell and Gaga for using their time to make speech's regarding specific issues during the glaring silence of other attendees and in the wake of the heavy handed speeches of 2017, Jaden Smith wore a literal house on their head solidifying the Smith siblings as 'fitspiration goals for the Zebrowski's. Holden is calling for Bianca and Kanye to be arrested and we're ALL still waiting for that solo Bianca Censori interview to disprove the morse code eye blinks rumor, and finally in one of the most eye rolling turns Kanye claims he was trying to recreate his 2024 Vulture album cover IRL, but they still didn't get escorted out like rumors and the once again POOCRAVED MJ claimed! In other celebrity news, the court date is finally set in the Blake Lively v. Justin Baldoni case and it's not until NEXT YEAR!! But, lucky for everyone Baldoni made a custom website to release every.single.piece.of.evidence in the case like any completely normal and rational person would do, and this brought up the old controversy of Blake Lively BURPIN' n' FARTIN' DURING BREAKS ON THE SET OF GOSSIP GIRL!??! And in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner: the Ariana x Jim Carrey plot T H I C K E N I N G??!!???, a list of Celebrity Facts That Sound Like Gossip But Are SHOCKINGLY TRUUUUUEEE!!!! (and we do mean SHOCKINGLY), BLINDZ, SHOUTZ AND MOOOORE!!! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 7 February 2025

This week on Talkin' TV Holden, MJ, and Jackie reflect on the social immaturity of the Real Housewives and get into the dark side of family vloggin' with "An Update on Our Family" and the horribly sad tale of Huxley. Jackie gets into "The Detroiters" and is lovin' it, and MJ finally checked out "A Real Pain." Holden continues the frog narrated "The Curious Case Of..." which featured Nicholas Rossi aka, Arthur Knight aka, Nicholas Alahverdian aka, a sex offender who faked his own death, staying with Max, MJ got into "Baylen Out Loud", Holden reviews "Biggest Heist Ever" and "Sons of Ecstasy" while Jackie says GO SEE "COMPANION!" All that and more on this week's Talkin' TV! Real Housewives of Salt Lake City - Peacock An Update on Our Family - Max Detroiters - Netflix A Real Pain - Hulu The Curious Case Of... - Max Baylen Out Loud - Discovery+, Max Biggest Heist Ever - Netflix The Sons of Ecstasy - Max The Companion - IN THE THEATAHHHHH Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 5 February 2025

This week on Page 7, Jackie gets introduced to Toonces, the Cat Who Could Drive a Car after unveiling her parody of "Baby Driver"(featuring a driving baby) to MJ and Holden, and TLC unleashes it's whiplash inducing "The Baldwins" trailer. Camila Cabello is at odds with the internet again after photos of her recent arena show looked like a ghost town, Reese Witherspoon went on the Today Show with news of how jury duty (DOODY) was, and that they made her the foreperson because of her role in Legally Blonde??? The musical "Emilia Pérez" seems like it's only negative stereotypes despite 13 noms, but no one at Page 7 has seen it yet to know if it's the TRASH it's claimed to be, and in Celebrity Conspiracy: Is Zach Bryant the reincarnation of Henry VIII!?!?!? The List - Celebrities With ABOLSUTELY WILD LOOOORE, Blindz and MOOOOORE! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 30 January 2025

This week on Talkin' TV MJ is back and Jackie is demanding to see "Baby Girl", MJ finally saw "The Substance", and Holden is comin' for Jackie's insensitivity. Jackie gives a rundown of "The Last Showgirl" and it's painful beauty before Holden takes us down a dark path of his boyhood Pam Anderson spank sessions. Holden gets into the Brony video by Jenny Nicholson, which leads Jackie into the gone but not forgotten Garfield's Nightmare, and "The Curious Case Of..." keeps getting curiouser. Jackie gets into "The Traitors" and liked "Presence" despite the bad reviews, and is headed out into the frontier with "American Primeval" along with a lot of pissed off Mormons, all that and more on this weeks Talkin' TV! The Substance - Amazon Prime The Last Showgirl - IN THE THEATAHHHH The Last Bronycon - Jenny Nicholson Youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4fVOF2PiHnc&ab_channel=JennyNicholson Disney's Fastpass: A Complicated History - Defunctland https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9yjZpBq1XBE&ab_channel=Defunctland The Curious Case of.... - Max The Traitors Season 3 - Peacock Dungeons and Drag Queens - Dropout Presence - IN THE THEATAHHHHHHH The Geordie Shore - Paramount+ Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 29 January 2025

This week on Page 7 Jackie, MJ, and Holden the Slyc3r are feelin' the horrors of the world this week including the death of David Lynch. Twin Peaks gets everyone talkin' 'bout small towns, Holden reveals he loved the Avatar pinball game, MJ gives a report from the trenches of children with the flu and norovirus, and fulfilling some apocalyptic prophecy, Progresso releases Soup Drops. Jackie sets some details straight about the SNL 50 documentary covering 2Hot4NBC Henry's audition, plus Snoop Dogg, Carrie Underwood, and other celebs, brought shame to us all on Jan. 20th! In Celebrity Conspiracy Corner: Did Tay lip sync ALL OF HER ERAS SHOWS!??!! The List - 12 wild reasons celebs declined parts, and BLINDZ! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 24 January 2025

This week it's just Holden and Jackie, and they're both mourning the loss of David Lynch by viewing his filmic experiences, and both make plans to revisit shows they stopped in the past like post season 1 Twin Peaks, and HBO's Watchmen. Holden spent too much money at Amoeba Records, but got a pretty sweet Beyonce boxset vinyl! Jackie recalls watching Mulholland Drive with her mother in the theatre at roughly age 13. Jackie hates her love for Bad Girls Club, and despite spoiling it for Holden, Jackie won't let him spoil "The Brutalist". Jackie gives a breakdown of the Bam Margera episode of "The Curious Case Of...", and Holden lets Jackie know what he's thinkin' of the breakdown of "Dear Evan Hansen" by Jenny Nicholson. Jackie was not super impressed with "A Real Pain", but worth a watch now that it's on Hulu, and Holden gives an update on Kings of Tupelo! Great Art Explained is a Great Break from the current reality, Jackie rewatched Starry Eyes, and EVEN MOOOOORE! Twin Peaks - Paramount+ Lost Highway - Amazon Prime Real Housewives of SLC - Peacock Bad Girls Club Season 7 - Oxygen Curious Case of....Bam Margera - Max A Real Pain - Hulu The Kings of Tupelo - Netflix Great Art Explained - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vBG621XEegk&ab_channel=GreatArtExplained Starry Eyes - Peacock

Transcribed - Published: 22 January 2025

This week on Page 7, Jackie is feelin' lucky despite the fires that rage around her, and Holden reminding her that no one has ever thought she was lucky, while MJ fears from the east coast that their cohosts will soon fall before the march of flame. Jackie reviews the trailer for "Better Man" the Robbie Williams Monkey Man Biopic Box office bombGARBAGE. Heidi Montag and the human fleshbeard she's married to lost their homes, but then made TikTokz about not having money because of her big ol' flop of a musical career in 2010 and people made her song go popular, so now human fleshbeard cries in the TikTokz happily. The carrier of Ethan Slater's spongette wrote an article for The Cut and celebs in LA are showin' up in news coverage as Steve Guttenberg begged people to leave their keys in their cars they abandon in the road, and Dennis Quaid got interviewed as he was LITERALLY packing up his little sports car to evacuate. Meghan Markle honor's the fires by delaying the release of her new Netflix show "With Love, Meghan." Mel Gibson's house burned to the ground while he was being a POS on the Rogan podcast and now he's blaming immigrants, or anyone he doesn't like, for all his problems... again. Celebrity Conspiracy Corner: Elvis LIVES?!?!?!? A List filled with surprising facts from celebrity personal lives, the Blindzzzzzzz and SHOUT OUTS!! Want to help out those effected by the fires in LA? antirecidivism.org is raising money for the incarcerated prisoners that are fighting the LA fires, 100% of the donations go directly to them when you write 'firefighter fund' on your donation! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 17 January 2025

This week on Page 7, Holden and Jackie give an update on what it's been like living in the fires as well as give MJ a rundown on Anora. Jackie avoided the fire one day by seeing The Brutalist, and MJ reports back that Season 3 of Natalia Grace probably shouldn't exist, but it did get Gideon and them to watch something other than Only Murderers, despite the true star of the show "Lady Out A Window" finally appearing. The new Jerry Springer doc on Netflix is just as crazy as it seems, and Jackie recommends Jenny Nicholson's youtube doc ripping apart the Dear Evan Hanson movie. Holden recommends Netflix's "No Good Deed" which reminds MJ of Lisa Kudrows classic comedy series "The Comeback" and Jackie has given up on Squid Game. MJ finished Other Mothers and gives it a thumbs up, Holden's still readin' One Piece, and Jackie finally finished creature commandos and highly recommends it! All that and more on this week's Talkin' TV! Want to help out those affected by the fires in LA? antirecidivism.org is raising money for the incarcerated prisoners that are fighting the LA fires, 100% of the donations go directly to them when you write 'firefighter fund' on your donation! Anora - Amazon Prime The Brutalist- in the THEATAHHHH The Curious Case of.....- Max Jerry Springer: Fights, Camera, Action - Netflix A Needlessly Thorough Roast of Dear Evan Hansen - Jenny Nicholson Youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8quWUSZCW5g&ab_channel=JennyNicholson No Good Deed - Netflix The Comeback - Max You Can't Ask That - Netflix The Other Mothers by KATHERINE FAULKNER Creature Commandos - Max Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 15 January 2025

In this week's Page 7, Jackie belts out her song she sings for Wendy, Holden is revealed to not know Carmy's full name, and is busy ordering a Taylor Swift vinyl during the recording, all while fiery wind tears apart LA. MJ lets Holden know they WON'T get rid of the TSwift book he gifted them, but has definitely thought about it. Language once again fails Hilaria Baldwin as she forgot the word for onion while making a traditional tortilla for her husband who hates onion, Nikki Glaser killed it as this year's Golden Globes host, the Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni feud is really looking bad for Baldoni, but in lighter news Timothée did a delightful interview with Canadian treasure Nardwuar, Tom Holland and Zendaya are engaged AND ADORABLE! Is Jay Leno repeatedly falling, or is the more likely story that he's regularly being beaten by the mob!? The inventor of queer pop Jojo Siwa graces us once again with a new music video, and in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner: Is Mariah Carey Literally FROZEN!? This week's list is celeb fams you didn't realize were FEEEUUDINNNNGGG, the blindz and SHOUT OUTZZZ! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 9 January 2025

After this week's Songs in the Key of Z inspired opening (and closing), Holden, MJ and Jackie get into Holden's John Grisham-house childhood, and MJ and Holden talk about the mommy murder books they've been readin'. Jackie and Kara of "Who's the Bitch" double date to see "Baby Girl", and MJ brings up another Kidman-led project, murder "The Perfect Couple" on Netflix. Jackie mentions her fever dream like time with the Hallmark reality show "Finding Mr. Christmas" and MJ and Holden gear up to plan Christmas much better in 2025. New Years may have not actually happened with Jackie unable to find a ball drop not behind a paywall, Holden experiencing the countdown via listening to his apartment neighbors count down (which is not the saddest thing this editor has heard in 2025), and MJ attending a NYE party with the kids and home before 9! Jackie gives a rundown of "Nosferatu" and lets everyone know that "Shadow of the Vampire" isn't easy to find via streaming. Jackie tries to get into Squid Game Season 2, but just doesn't care enough to keep it going, but a 3rd grader MJ's kids know loves it. Holden brings up the bizarre overacting "comedy" videos that keep coming up on his socials, and MORE! Other Mothers by Rachel M Harper Babygirl - IN THE THEATAHHHHH The Perfect Couple - Netflix Finding Mr. Christmas - Hallmark+ Challengers - Amazon Prime Conclave - Peacock Nosferatu - IN THE THEATAHHHHHH Squid Game - Netflix Star Wars: Skeleton Crew - Disney + Only Murders In the Building - Hulu Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 8 January 2025

It's a new year during this holidazzze break and a new resolution of not saying anything if you can't say anything nice, so here's a watchalong! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 2 January 2025

Don't have any plans for When Christmas Is Gone? WELL HO HO HO YOU ARE IN LUCK! GET READY TO RELIVE ALL THAT HOLIDAY CHEER WITH THE ANUUAL PAGE 7 MUPPETS CHRISTMAS CAROL WATCHALONG, finally brought to you in recorded form! Drinking game rules: Heavy drink every time a ghost appears drink anytime food talks drink whenever Rizzo gets hurt and finish your drink when 'When Love is Gone' is played Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 26 December 2024

It's time to break out those Christmas Shoes! This week on Page 7 the holiday season is fully upon us, as Jackie just finished her Christmas with Linda, Holden's sippin' on his liquor advent calendar, and MJ is preparing to battle an invading onslaught of slime. The Goop gift list features an insanely expensive book about watches, and Drake really wants to be part of the lookalike contest fad to the point that it's kinda sad. Holden and Jackie report back from the Spotify Wrapped party where they got to see Kesha up close and were surrounded by youngs, which Holden did not find attractive as he only likes MILF porn. Rumors are a brewin' that Jason Kelce doesn't take care of his kids and has forced his wife to hire help, and Walt Disney's possibly frozen head appears again in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner: The Frozen Coverup!? The Ultimate Christmas Trivia List, Blindz and EVEN MORE ON THIS PRE HOLIDAY PAGE 7! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 20 December 2024

This week on Talkin' TV Holden's limpin' across the finish line, with the help of House of Villains, Jackie makes her case for New York being the best reality star of all time, and MJ brings up the similarities between New York and Mary from Real Housewives of SLC. MJ recommends a new Ina Garten series and Jackie sadly gives the news that Linda thinks Ina Garten is booooring, but Jackie comes in with a strong recommendation for "Creature Commandos!" Holden recommended "English Teacher", which somehow just had an abuse scandal roughly an hour before recording, "What We Do In The Shadows" wraps up with its series finale, and MJ relates to Kieran Culkin not showing his kids the Home Alone films as they are kind of a nightmare for a small child. Jackie gives a rundown of the Christmas classics she's been running through with Linda, MJ tells tale of "The Merry Gentleman" on Netflix, Holden brings up a film featuring a far more foul group of Merry Gentleman, then makes it worse by bringing up JonBenét Ramsey, AND MORE on this week's Talkin' TV! House of Villains Season 2 - Peacock LIFE IN THE COLDEST VILLAGE - Kiun B Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@KiunB Be My Guest with Ina Garten- Max Creature Commandos - Max English Teacher - Hulu What We Do In The Shadows - Hulu Only Murders In The Building - Hulu Home Alone 1 and 2 - Disney+ Christmas with the Kranks - Amazon Prime Four Christmases - Hulu The Merry Gentlemen - Netflix Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 18 December 2024

This week on Page 7 Jackie's gossin' with Holden and MJ about the showstopping lyrical genius of I Saw Mommy Kissing Beetlejuice, and brings up their journey to make Horny Christmas happen! Speaking of Horny Christmas, Sabrina Carpenter and Barry Keoghan couldn't make it work, and for some reason people are showing up at his grandma's to ask why? Jackie is going off on Doechii being a great artist havin' her moment after her tiny desk concert as well her appearance on Colbert, Matty Healy and Azealia Banks are feuding on Twitter (and real life!) after he stepped his foot directly into his mouth to stop her attacking Charli XCX, Hilaria Baldwin's 11 year old daughter dropped a skincare book which raises some questions about children in the beauty industry, and finally in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner: Do You Believe In BONO'S LITTER BOX?! Not to mention a very on theme list of Christmas Music Trivia that the validity of is quickly called into question, Blindz, and even MORE! Want even more Page 7? Support us on Patreon! Patreon.com/Page7Podcast

Transcribed - Published: 12 December 2024