Do you want to know it the number one predictor of divorces? The number one predictor of divorce? It's not cheating. It's not money. It's not abuse. It's contempt. Yeah. The eyes rolling when he speaks. The sarcasm dripping from your voice. The arms crossed. The heavy size. And here's what terrifies me. You don't even know what you're doing.

You don't. I'm mindful of Missima, married 20 plus years to my best friend. I have five kids, eight grandchildren, the eighth is on the way. But here's what matters. Helping 30,000 plus women all over the world. Either get married or save their marriages. We're on a mission. And I just want to tell you today, your marriage is not dying from a lack of love.

It's being murdered, murdered by your communication.

So before you think, blame the woman again, stop.

No, this is not about power.

It never was.

The person who controls the communication controls the outcome.

Allah, subhanna, a a a a lot obviously controls everything in the end. But there is so much about this that you have control over. You might not even realize. You want to help him more, there's a way to do that. You want him to open up. There's a language to do that. Do you want him to prioritize you? There's a tone that gets him to do that. But if you keep nagging, criticizing, or speaking in a particular way that has gotten you to where you are now and just calling it like honesty,

bringing your CEO voice home, that's not going to work. You'll just keep getting what you're

getting. Which usually is a checked out defensive man. And listen, if your marriage dies,

it's not just you. You have the kids. We have to make it work for the kids. And even if you don't have kids yet, you're unborn kids, the ones that you really want to have, but this stuff is happening. Elisipanao Ta'aela has given us a powerful role as women. He has given you a powerful role. Let's stop wasting it right away when we could be way more effective. Today I'm going to give you the three communication patterns that are slowly killing your marriage and exactly how to fix them. Grab a cup of coffee or tea, a notebook. You are not going to want to miss this one. Let's go. Welcome to the Mindfulness Speaks podcast, a safe space to learn and grow into the

best version of yourself that you're always meant to be. I'm your host, mindful Muslim

a mom of five, big sister to the community and a licensed educator with 25 plus years and

supporting tens of thousands of Muslim women worldwide. Now I'm excited to share a ton of solutions

to your problems on love, relationships, life balance,

reconnecting with the less dependent with Aile, getting back on track and more.

So grab a cup of coffee and close out those tabs.

These next 20 to 30 minutes are all about you.

Let's get started.

This was literally crazy.

I wanted to share with you because it has changed everything.

This sister, she really needed help. She came from an absolutely toxic family.

...