You’re NOT Really Looking for Marriage (Here’s the Real Reason You’re Still Single)
Mindful Muslimah Speaks
Mindful Muslimah Speaks
4.8 • 855 Ratings
🗓️ 17 November 2025
⏱️ 17 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
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You think you’re ready for marriage — but what if the truth is that you’ve made the search your identity? In this raw, faith-based talk, Mindful Muslima breaks down the #1 hidden reason so many Muslim women stay stuck — not because there are no good men, but because of how they’re choosing.
You’ll discover how confusing feelings with facts leads to heartbreak, and why your “butterflies” might actually be anxiety — not chemistry. It’s time to shift from emotional decisions to faith-based clarity.
If you’re serious about getting married this year, this episode will wake you up and show you what’s really blocking your path.
Grab your coffee ☕ and your notebook — this one’s deep.
TIMESTAMPS:
00:00 – 00:00:10 | Real Talk — The Harsh Truth
00:00:10 – 00:00:26 | When Searching Becomes Your Identity
00:00:26 – 00:00:48 | The Fear of Actually Finding Him
00:01:26 – 00:01:44 | The #1 Thing Sabotaging Your Search
00:01:44 – 00:01:57 | Feelings vs. Facts
00:01:57 – 00:02:16 | The Big Confusion
00:02:16 – 00:03:04 | Hannah’s Story — The “Butterflies” Trap
00:03:04 – 00:03:59 | What Butterflies Really Mean
00:04:00 – 00:04:45 | The Truth About Why You’re Still Single
00:04:45 – 00:05:57 | Aisha’s Story — How Everything Changed
00:05:57 – 00:07:32 | The System That Actually Works
00:07:32 – 00:08:09 | How Real Love Grows
00:08:09 – 00:10:14 | The Broken System of “Vibes” Dating
00:10:14 – 00:11:21 | Feelings Can’t Vet Porn, Anger, or Ego
00:12:24 – 00:13:28 | Seeing Your Blind Spots
00:14:41 – 00:15:19 | The Hard Truth for Introverts
00:15:19 – 00:15:54 | Why You’re Overthinking Marriage
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Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Real talk. I'm going to tell you something that's going to make you want to take your phone and throw it across the room. |
| 0:04.9 | You're not really looking for marriage. You think you are, but you're not. And you're like, you don't even know me. How do you know what I'm doing? |
| 0:11.7 | But listen, you think you are, you tell everyone about it, you cry about it, you make da'a about it when you're alone. |
| 0:17.5 | The real truth, you've made this whole thing of looking for a man trying to get married in this part of your life, part of your entire identity. It's now your |
| 0:21.2 | personality. It's now your excuse of why everything in your life isn't working right now. |
| 0:25.6 | But can I tell you a secret, woman and woman? Deep down, you're actually terrified of actually |
| 0:31.2 | finding him. I know you think it's going to be amazing, but you're also terrified. |
| 0:36.2 | Because if you found him, all of this search would stop. |
| 0:41.1 | You would be in a place that is so uncomfortable that you've never been before. |
| 0:44.6 | How do I know all this? |
| 0:48.6 | Because I've been doing this for 25 years. |
| 0:49.6 | Welcome to the mindfulness Miss Beaks podcast, a safe space to learn and grow into the best |
| 0:51.9 | version of yourself that you're always meant to be. |
| 0:55.9 | I'm your host, mindful Muslim, mom of five, big sister to the community and a licensed |
| 0:58.3 | educator with 25 plus years and supporting tens of thousands of Muslim women worldwide. |
| 1:02.4 | Now I'm excited to share a ton of solutions to your problems on love, relationships, life balance, reconnecting with a less appendixal with Aal, getting back on track and more. So grab a cup of coffee and close out those tabs. These next 20 to 30 minutes are all about you. Let's get started. Al-Assadamu al-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-tu. Welcome-tal-a-tah-a-tah-a-tah-a-tah-a-tah-a-tah-a-tah-a-l-a-tah-a-a-tah-a-a-l-a-a-old-a-a-old-a-old-a-old-a-old-a-old-a if you only knew. So what is it? Well, there's a couple |
| 1:07.4 | things, but I'm going to drop you one big one, big one right now. And it is you're basing things on feelings, not facts. And that's not just the whole problem, but let's start there. Before you roll your eyes and you're like, oh, you don't know what I've been through. There's so much this, this, this guy, |
| 1:45.3 | this app, just hear me out. What I'm really saying is you've confused anxiety with intuition. |
| 2:01.0 | You've confused fear with wisdom. And you've confused comfort with compatibility. That's a really |
| 2:06.1 | different thing. And let me show you an example of exactly what I mean. There was a sister, |
| 2:12.8 | her name was Hannah. |
| 2:17.1 | She came to me. |
... |
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