Let's begin this episode with a story.

I have a little crush right now, okay?

A little crush.

And when I say a little crush, I literally mean a little crush.

This is a crush so little that it will never leave the confines of my mind.

Okay?

I will never pursue this man in real life.

This is simply a little crush for my brain to enjoy in this moment of being

newly single. Like this is, this is just a little something for my single brain to chew on and nothing

more. I will never date this man in real life. I can almost 100% promise you that. I can like 98% promise you that.

Why? Because there are so many variables in place that make it so that I should never be with

this man, probably can never be with this man. Like it just doesn't make sense. But here's the deal.

I see him all the time in passing i see

him multiple times a week and you want to know the craziest part i have never spoken to him never once

it's very clear that this person is shy apparently i'm shy too i cannot talk to him in fact i can't even

look at him i've barely ever even made eye

contact with him. I've only ever looked at him from a farm and like, wow, really handsome.

And then the second, like, his head moves to where maybe he could slightly see me, I look away.

Now, this is an issue. I need to get comfortable with talking to boys. And even more than that, maybe flirting a little

with boys. I don't even know how to make eye contact with him. How am I supposed to talk to him?

Now, I know what some of you are thinking, Emma, he's not talking to you either. True. And I've

thought about it a lot. Like, is that a red flag in a guy if they don't, you know, initiate? I don't think it is. I don't know. I'm actually really conflicted about it. I don't know if it's a red flag or not. On one hand, it's like, for me, personally, I do prefer a guy to be forward with me to make the first move. I prefer that. I kind of need that. I can't even

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