UFYB 50: People-Pleasing 2.0

UnF*ck Your Brain: Feminist Self-Help for Everyone

Kara Loewentheil

Health & Fitness, Mental Health, Education, Self-improvement, Philosophy, Society & Culture

4.6 • 5.5K Ratings

🗓️ 11 October 2018

⏱️ 13 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Today, I want to teach you more in-depth about people-pleasing and why I think we should stop using that terminology. Join me today for People-Pleasing 2.0 and discover how this behavior sabotages your authenticity and perpetuates dishonest relationships. Plus, I share a couple of steps to ending this deceptive cycle. Awareness is key, my chickens. Notice your thoughts and you can change them!

Get full show notes and more information here: https://unfckyourbrain.com/50

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Welcome to Unfuck Your Brain. The only podcast that teaches you how to use psychology, feminism,
0:14.0	and coaching to rewire your brain and get what you want in life. And now here's your
0:19.3	host, Harvard Law School grad, feminist rock star, and master coach, Paura Lowenthal.
0:31.3	Hello my chickens. How is the flock today? I am excited because it is finally fall in New York. And I
0:40.1	love this season because it's sunny, but it's not hot and the air is crisp and I can survive my
0:46.1	apartment without air conditioning. So life is good. I just spent today going through a big batch
0:52.6	of applications for Unfuck Your Brain, which is those of you newer around here. It's not just
0:58.3	the name of the podcast. It's also my coaching program. And one of the things I noticed while I
1:03.9	was reading the applications was how many of the women identified themselves as people pleasers.
1:11.0	And I find that most of my clients share this trait. And so today I want to teach you more in
1:17.0	depth about people pleasing. I have taught about people pleasing on the podcast before. There's almost
1:22.2	a year ago. And so some of you probably have never even gone that far back. And for those of you who
1:28.3	have, there's always space to take the work deeper. And one of the changes that I have made are
1:35.5	developments in the way that I teach this concept is that I don't even like calling it people
1:40.6	pleasers anymore. Because I think that that term kind of perpetuates this delusion that number one
1:47.8	we can please other people. And number two, that this behavior has anything to do with other people,
1:53.9	which it really doesn't. Like calling ourselves people pleasers sort of makes it sound like we just
1:59.9	really care about other people being happy. Right? It like almost validates that this makes us kind of a
2:06.6	good or nice person. And it sounds so lovely, but it's such a destructive habit. And so I don't
2:13.5	even want to call it that anymore. I don't want to call it people pleasing because I think that it
2:18.2	just becomes this sort of identity. And it almost sounds like it makes us just a really sensitive kind
2:25.0	person. So instead, I want to call it people deceiving. Because people pleasing is your attempt to
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Kara Loewentheil, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Kara Loewentheil and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.