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Monday Morning Podcast

Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 7-6-17

Monday Morning Podcast

All Things Comedy

Comedy

4.832.8K Ratings

🗓️ 6 July 2017

⏱️ 104 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Bill rambles about new ball parks, cows and the cheating Colts.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Byrne. It's time for the month. I know what his

0:05.3

No, it's the Thursday afternoon just before Friday Monday morning podcast. And I'll just

0:15.2

check it it all. Sorry, I'm saving my voice. I fucked up my voice a couple months ago when

0:19.8

I just ignored it. And now I am I'm throat-coding teeing it. I'm I've got some halls sucking

0:28.0

on the halls there. Dude, it's the fucking mental liftus. What the fucking says on the

0:35.7

thing? Hall's mental lipless mental liftus. Eucalyptus. I don't know. Take a steam. You

0:43.6

what you need to do for your voice is you need to stop talking. You need to drink some

0:48.6

condensed milk. It's like 20 people right now. Condensed milk. We'll actually close

0:54.7

flimsh. Shut the fuck up. You never went to medical school. Okay. All you did was drink

1:01.0

a glass of milk. Stop talking like you were a fucking veterinarian. Oh, you know, I

1:05.2

didn't want to be in a mood like this. All right. So Billy, no fun. Now I've cried wolf

1:13.9

for about three weeks right now talking about how I was going to get my act together.

1:19.3

Right. I was going to I was going to start working clean on stage. I was going to, you

1:25.9

know, get my relationship with Christ going again. I'm talking to that guy and fucking forever.

1:33.4

We had a big fallen out. I mean that guy, you know, and I still feel like he owes me

1:37.9

the apology. I'm waiting for him to call, you know, I'm waiting for him to reach out.

1:45.1

But you know, I can see that he's being a big baby about it. So evidently, you know,

1:48.6

I'm going to have to be the big a man. You know, I'm going to have to reach out. Jesus,

1:55.3

if you could. Could you help me avoid the demon of the booze? No, I was good. This is

2:02.9

how much I've been eating and drinking like a fucking asshole. I just shut everything

2:06.6

down Sunday night and I lost four pounds this week. You know, just fucking and I even

2:17.5

got hammered one night. I was doing so well. Dude, the fourth of July. Happy birthday, dear

...

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