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Monday Morning Podcast

Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 1-11-18

Monday Morning Podcast

All Things Comedy

Comedy

4.734.1K Ratings

🗓️ 11 January 2018

⏱️ 90 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Bill rambles about JP Morgan, Alabama and cross checking a relative. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hey, what's going on, Spielberg, and it's time for the Thursday afternoon just before Friday, Monday morning podcast and I'll just check it in on you.

0:10.0

How was your week going? Is it the way you planned it? Is 2018 turning out to be the year you wanted it to be?

0:20.0

I'm beginning my transformation of my new fucking wardrobe. But you knew close. You know something I never took seriously with socks?

0:33.0

I'd go down to the fucking foot locker and I just grab a pair of you know a package of those things and I would wear them for like three years.

0:45.0

I don't own any white socks. They're all gray. I don't know. It's just something I've never been into. And then for Christmas somebody actually got me some new socks and they were great.

0:58.0

But they weren't like you know like dress socks or some shit like, oh great. I got a way to somebody dies and gets married before I wear these fucking things.

1:08.0

They were just like you know they weren't athletic socks. They were just sort of socks you could still wear with sneakers. They were a little thicker.

1:16.0

You know I'm an old man. I was like he's fell real comfy on my feet. So that was it. I you know and then I had him sit in my sock drawer next to all these sad gray socks that have been loyal for all these years.

1:31.0

And all the old socks were looking at me like, Bill you're not going to move the company to another country. Are you man? You're not going to break up the union.

1:42.0

We've been there for you for a long time. Man. I was like you will get nothing. I owe the public nothing. Who's quote was that? I owe the public nothing.

1:52.0

It's one of those robber barren guys back in the day and who even knows that they if they robbed anybody maybe they were just better at business than most people. Maybe they had it in them to tell some old lady to hit the bricks. She would done with them.

2:05.0

Let me see something who said was it Andrew Carnegie or Carnegie is they say in Pittsburgh. I owe the public nothing.

2:19.0

Over JP Morgan. Oh JP JP the original heel. Huh? How great what he event. You know, I bet if he lived right now he'd be he'd be working for Vince McMahon crushing it on the mic. I owe the public nothing.

2:41.0

That is so fucking mean. So wrong and so right all at the same time. I've never quite felt I never really felt one way or another about that one. First I was like what a fucking dick. You know.

2:55.0

And then what happens is you start doing a little well in life and then all of a sudden some douchebag in your life starts giving you shit about it and wants you to give him fucking money just for being there. You know.

3:11.0

You start going well I guess I kind of understand what JP Morgan was saying granted you know what I mean I didn't fucking create the Federal Reserve system that enslaves fucking people you know.

3:21.0

Take it away from this car. I want to get down. I don't want to go down that rabbit hole. You know.

3:26.0

This has always been my rule as far as helping people out. Okay. If you're laying in the ditch and you're reaching up I'll reach down and try to pull you out.

3:34.0

All right. But if you're face down in the ditch digging it deeper every day. Yeah. I'm not throwing money in that.

3:40.0

Get your shit together. Okay. Get a little streak going a little streak going of doing the right fucking thing that you'll be surprised how much the world will help you out.

3:54.0

I would think. But what do I know I am a privileged white male. I remember what I was born and I was on my dad's yacht right.

4:03.0

And we were talking to the next seven presidential candidates and they were letting me decide who was going to be president.

...

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