The following podcast is a deer media production.

I've had quite a week slash weekend.

I don't even really know where to begin.

I've had a full come to Jesus moment of clarity and genuine remorse with the one and only

pioneer woman hot tip.

She listens to this podcast.

We're going to touch on that.

I fostered a homosexual romance for my best friend Max.

I watched Emily in Paris in its entirety and I accidentally glued my vagina closed and was

peeing upstream like the Bellagio fountains.

How does that happen?

I'm about to fucking tell you.

Hi everybody.

Woo!

In the spirit of growth and reflection and just maturity, I would like to issue a public apology

to the one and only pioneer woman now in last week's episode.

I mean you just can't write this shit.

This is the story of my life, the fiber of my being, the tapestry of my existence is talking shit

and then feeling really really bad about it selectively.

This is far and few in between.

I will not be issuing more public apologies.

I think they are spars.

...