The Summer Bears Came For The Winter | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

2 Bears 1 Cave

Comedy, Society & Culture

4.8 • 23.2K Ratings

🗓️ 15 December 2025

⏱️ 70 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

SPONSORS: - Don’t miss out on all the action this week at DraftKings! Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using https://dkng.co/bears or through my promo code BEARS - Protect your family with life insurance from Ethos. Get your free quote at https://Ethos.com/BEARS - Head to https://DRINKAG1.com/BEARS you’ll get the welcome kit, a Morning Person hat, a bottle of Vitamin D3+K2, a AG1 Flavor Sampler and you’ll get to try their new sleep supplement AGZ for free. - Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/bears. Christmas CAME early! The Summer Bears are now the *Winter Bears* and they have returned to phone it in and fulfill some contractually obligated laughs. Chris Distefano and Stavros Halkias invade YMH Studios to talk awful breakfast decisions, Bert’s cruise from hell, fat-guy medicine science, Husky-induced life chaos, bombing on MTV, fighting GLP-1 drugs, Mike Tyson saving Big Pun at The Tunnel, and why both of them should never own pets, houses, or functioning digestive systems. It’s chaotic, barely prepared, medically concerning, and absolutely perfect. Enjoy! https://www.instagram.com/stavvybaby2 https://www.instagram.com/chrisdcomedy/ 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 319 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://www.chrisdcomedy.com/ https://www.stavvy.biz/ https://store.ymhstudios.com Gambling problem? Call one eight hundred Gambler. In New York, call 8778-HOPENY or text HOPENY (467369). In Connecticut, Help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit https://ccpg.org. Please play responsibly. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (Kansas). Pass-thru of per wager tax may apply in Illinois. Twenty-one plus age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Void in Ontario. Restrictions apply. Bet must win to receive Bonus Bets which expire in 7 days. Minimum odds required. For additional terms and responsible gaming resources, see https://DKNG.co/audio. Limited time offer. Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:03:29 - Slutty Little Breakfast 00:07:14 - Podcast Polyamory 00:14:15 - Chrissy Housing Crisis 00:21:35 - Stavros Vs Fat Guy Medicine 00:31:48 - Fat Joe, Guy Code, & Graveyard Of Failed Shows 00:46:14 - Maybe The Worst Dog Ever 00:56:17 - Geopolitical Shenanigans & NYC Mayors 01:08:11 - Wrap Up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	100%
0:02.0	Cheers
0:05.0	Hey everybody and welcome to the winter beers
0:09.0	Look at us
0:10.0	Wow
0:11.0	Wow they are we thought they were phoning it in in the summer
0:15.0	Yes
0:16.0	But this is a neck this is the next level folks
0:18.0	Get ready
0:19.0	Tom is just in the room over there Yes He's He's just over there having coffee. Then we want to be clear. We will never do this show full time. Never. Never. It's not going to happen. And we did, we thought we were doing a horrible job last time. You are in for four of the most phoned in episodes you've ever experienced in your lives. And we don't
0:39.2	give a fuck. That's the beauty of this. This is like, okay, last episode, last, the last summer,
0:45.1	it was like when your, your parents have a work trip. So they have to get a babysitter to watch
0:50.6	you. This is just, now your parents are on benzos in the pool
0:55.1	and they've just hired a maid to look at you.
0:57.8	We're just like a babysitter
1:00.8	because your parents are sick of looking you in the face.
1:04.0	100% two things,
1:05.3	and I'm speaking for you,
1:06.3	Stavi, but I believe that you'll agree with me.
1:08.7	Two things I'll never do in my life.
1:10.8	This podcast full-time or Bert Kreischer's comedy cruise.
1:18.0	Listen, yeah, the cruise is tough.
	...

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