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Monday Morning Podcast

Squats, Driverless Cars, Toothpaste Delivery | Monday Morning Podcast 8-11-25

Monday Morning Podcast

All Things Comedy

Comedy

4.832.8K Ratings

🗓️ 11 August 2025

⏱️ 57 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Bill rambles about squats, driverless cars, and toothpaste deliveries.


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Transcript

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0:00.0

Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burr. It's time for the Monday morning podcast for Monday,

0:06.3

August 11th, 2025. What's going on? How are you? How's things going out your way?

0:14.9

Oh, geez, are they going well there? Um, oh man, I'm all fucking stressed the fuck out.

0:24.0

I am so goddamn stressed out.

0:25.5

I can't figure out why.

0:26.5

I had a nice day.

0:27.4

Well, you know, let's be honest.

0:29.7

I don't know what.

0:30.2

It was like today.

0:30.8

Today was just one of those fucking days.

0:33.3

You know, I had this thing, you know, the open the door, automatic lock thing.

0:38.1

And it wasn't working. And I was like, oh, you know, I had this thing, you know, the open the door, automatic lock thing. And it wasn't working.

0:39.7

And I was like, you know, judging by the shape of this thing, this has one of those frisbee-type batteries.

0:45.0

Ah, we got those.

0:46.4

We got those out in the goddamn garage.

0:49.3

We can do that, you know, we have it.

0:52.3

So, Jesus fucking Christ, this lady just walked by by the way

0:55.7

she fucking walks by she's walking her dogs and she's like talking full volume on her phone

1:01.5

you know like the level that everybody is addicted to their phones I'm talking about myself too

1:08.3

I kind of got back into reading so I could kind of curb it.

1:12.0

Like if you ever take a peek, you averaged eight hours.

1:14.9

Get the fuck out of here, eight hours.

...

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