S17E3: What Gaslighting, Red Flags, and Manipulation Sound Like

Cultivating H.E.R. Space: Uplifting Conversations for the Black Woman

Cultivating H.E.R. Space

Education, Self-improvement

4.7 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 20 January 2023

⏱️ 69 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Lady, healing isn’t linear, and it doesn’t always feel good, but with tools and strategies, you can navigate life with grace, clarity, and lightness. Dr. Dom and Terri have a deep conversation about the truth of gaslighting, red flags, and manipulation. Maybe you’ve heard these terms recently, but do you really know what they mean? Accessing the language around these pieces of the cycles of abuse can help you create a toolkit that can help you identify them earlier in your relationships. Knowing these terms can also help you identify when you have been the initiator of potentially harmful behavior. Lady, listen to this episode with your journal and a ton of grace and self-compassion. Terri and Dr. Dom clearly lay out the signs so that you can see them early and make decisions from a centered place. If this topic lights up something in you and you want to dig deeper check out these additional episodes:

S8E9: Getting the Relationship You Deserve with Allison Wellington
S10E2: Is Your Partner a Narcissist?
S10E3: How to Finally Leave Your Narcissistic Partner a Conversation with Dr. Ramani Durvasula

Red Flags

1. Gaslighting
2. Lovebombing
3. They don’t respect your boundaries
4. They check in frequently and there's a hint of possessiveness
5. They don't have many friends OR a good relationship with their family (or a relationship with themselves)
6. They want you to prioritize them
7. They try to isolate you and take up all your time and sometimes even bad talk those closest to you
8. You have a bad gut feeling

Quote of the Day: "Gaslighters confuse, intimidate, and disempower people for the purpose of controlling other people, and promoting the abusers' interests."
- Linda Hatch, PhD

Register here for the Vibrate Higher Empowerment Workshop!
Wisdom Wednesdays with Terri
Cultivating H.E.R. Space Sanctuary

Resources:
Dr. Dom’s Therapy Practice
Branding with Terri
Melanin and Mental Health
Therapy for Black Girls
Psychology Today
Therapy for QPOC

Where to find us:
Twitter: @HERspacepodcast
Instagram: @herspacepodcast
Facebook: @herspacepodcast
Website: cultivatingherspace.com

This show is part of the Spreaker Prime Network, if you are interested in advertising on this podcast, contact us at https://www.spreaker.com/show/5470036/advertisement

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	On this week's episode of Cultivating Her Space, gas lighting is a form of emotional abuse intended to make people think that they are losing their sanity by making them question their own reality.
0:18.0	Today's episode is sure to provide you with motivation, inspiration or a fresh perspective.
0:25.0	If you have any aha moments or appreciate anything from this episode, please leave us a review to let us know we're on the right track.
0:33.0	Also, we release episodes every Friday, so be sure to subscribe on iTunes and visit CultivatingHerSpace.com to access our exclusive after show and other bonus content from the Patreon tab.
0:49.0	Welcome to Cultivating Her Space, a podcast dedicated to uplifting women like you.
0:55.0	We're your hosts.
0:57.0	Dr. Dominic Brusar, a college professor and psychologist.
1:01.0	And Terry Lomax, a techie and motivational speaker.
1:04.0	In a world where black women are often misrepresented and misunderstood, please join us as we initiate authentic conversations on everything from five boards to fake friends.
1:17.0	And create a safe space where black women can just be.
1:24.0	Hey, lady. It's Dr. Dom here from the Cultivating Her Space podcast.
1:29.0	Are you currently a resident of the state of California and contemplating starting your therapy journey?
1:36.0	If so, please reach out to me at Dr. Dominic Brusar.com that's d-r-d-o-m-i-n-i-q-u-e-b-r-o-u-s-s-s-a-r-d.com to schedule a free 15-minute consultation.
1:57.0	I look forward to hearing from you.
2:00.0	Our quote of the day.
2:02.0	Gaslighters confuse, intimidate, and disempower people for the purpose of controlling other people and promoting the abusers' interests.
2:14.0	That quote comes to us from Dr. Linda Hatch.
2:19.0	I'm going to say that again because I know that was a lot and I want to make sure as lady as you are preparing for this episode that you really take this quote in.
2:31.0	Gaslighters confuse, intimidate, and disempower people for the purpose of controlling other people and promoting the abusers' interests.
2:46.0	T.
2:48.0	Ooh, this a lot that we have to discuss today.
2:54.0	It is, girl, it is indeed.
	...

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