The following podcast is a deer media production.

Somebody queue Britney Spears every time and throw my ass in a bath tub.

Not a sweet take man. What are we? Okay. Uh, hi, everyone. Welcome to the

Beach Bible podcast. No, I haven't given birth yet. Thanks for checking in.

Katie with two ease. I've got a influx of DMs this morning because people are

like, Jackie, are you giving birth? You weren't on Instagram yesterday. It was

fucking Father's Day. You dumb cunts. Like what? What? My dad? Like I'm going to exploit

my father on Father's Day for likes for content. No, I didn't. I was being

present. I don't think people realize how close I am to going off the grid.

Like I am my superpower is extreme detachment. So anything anything that I'm fully

lent into or like I could completely flip the switch at any given time. It is how I

stay so spicy. It's how my marriage stays alive. Like everyone knows that I could

go rogue, get in my car and fucking high tail it out of the country. Any given second.

And that or, you know, it's exciting for people. It's exciting. It's unstable, but so stable.

Does that make sense to you? Anyways, um, nope, I am still here just hanging on. I need

to keep this baby in another week and a half at least because, you know, I'm almost

done with my renovation. I have all new windows and doors going in, but they're supposed

to finish that today. But the installers are observing Juneteenth. Now, I don't know if

I'm allowed to say this, but they're all white. So I feel like they should be observing

Juneteenth by getting their ass to work. Now, if you're black, stay the fuck home. Put

your feet up and, you know, do whatever the fuck you want because you deserve it because

our country is fucked. The world is fucked. But a bunch of white dudes, I'm sorry. That's

...