Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm Baelif Jesse Thorn. This week, phone

of contention. Al brings the case against her husband, Kevin. Kevin's is stay at home

dad. He has a cell phone, but he's selective about when he chooses to use it. Al wants

him to pick up when she calls. Kevin says he gets back to her in due time.

Who's right? Who's wrong? Only one man can decide. Please rise as Judge John Hodgman

enters the courtroom and presents the obscure cultural reference.

I'm not in and listen. I'm sure you know this whole routine. Leave your name and number

and I'll try to get back to you. You have 30 seconds to get sworn in before you're

through. Baelif Jesse Thorn, swear I'm in. And that's our show. Please rise and raise

your right hand. Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth

so help you God or whatever? I do. I do. Do you swear to abide by Judge John Hodgman's

ruling despite the fact that he communicates exclusively telepathically? I do. I do.

Very well, Judge Hodgman. Oh, sorry. Alessandra and Kevin, you may be seated. Thank you very

much for coming to Judge John Hodgman. Dinner theater. For an immediate summary, judgment

in one of your favors can either of you name the song that I was singing as I entered

the courtroom and I need the name of the song and the artist if you don't mind. Kevin, you

were brought to court by your wife and against your will. So it's your first guess or you

can make her guess first, whichever you like, which will it be? I'm going to go with her

first. All right. Alessandra, it's your guess. I had many other songs prepared, but that

was not one of them. However, sounded a little bit like Melanie brand new key, but obviously

a little bit like what? Melanie brand new key. Very old, I think 70s. Melanie is the artist.

Artist. Yes. I'm brand new. I thought you were just saying it was a song named Melanie,

...