Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm Bill of Jesse Thorne. This week, no running back sees.

Tom brings the case against his wife, Kristen. Tom and Kristen are part of a fantasy football league.

Before the season began, Kristen wanted to draft Buffalo Bill's running back James Cook, but she knew he'd be drafted before it was her turn to pick.

So, before draft day, she asked Tom to draft this player for her.

She promised a favorable trade in return.

But when it came time to make the pass, Tom called an audible.

Hooke, he doesn't remember agreeing to this scheme.

Kristen is throwing a flag on Tom's play.

She says that her pre-draft agreement was binding.

Tom says,

Drafters keepers.

Who's right, who's wrong, only one can decide.

Please rise as Judge John Hodgman enters the courtroom and presents an obscure cultural

reference.

I used to write away to all these sailboat captains saying, hey, great news.

I'm 13 years old.

I have no experience.

I'm only available July and August.

Please hire me to come work as a deckhand on your historic wooden schooner. I sort of vowed to myself, someday I will sail the Jonna Hodgman Reach.

Bail of Jesse Thorne, please swear the litigants in. Tom, Kristen, please rise and raise your right hands. Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth? So help you, God, or whatever. I do. Do you swear to abide by Judge John Hodgman's ruling, despite the fact that he only follows the Canadian Football League? I do. He's a big Rough Riders fan. Which one? Yeah, exactly. Judge Hodgman, you may proceed. Tom and Kristen, you may be seated for an immediate summary judgment, one of your favorites can either be named the piece of obscure culture that I referenced as I entered the courtroom. I guess the answer is probably no, right, Tom and Kristen? That's correct. I can't. I have no idea. I don't know. I wouldn't know a non-obscure cultural reference. So I'm going to ask you this. See if you can get this one, Tom.

Okay.

There are two. I wouldn't know a non-obscure cultural reference. So I'm going to ask you this.

...