Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast.

I'm summertime, fun time, guest bailiff Monty Belmonti.

This week, no glow contenderay.

Michelle brings the case against her husband, Rob.

Rob is restoring an old grandfather clock to make it usable as a display case.

Michelle would like to display her uranium glass collection in the clock under a blacklight.

But Rob thinks adding a blacklight will look tacky.

Will Michelle's black lit uranium make Rob's grandfather clock come to life like Charlie

Bucket's Golden Ticket made his derelict grandfather come back to life?

Or will the blacklight make the grandfather clock look tacky like the 2022 film Blacklight

made the grandfatherly aged actor Liam Neeson look tacky?

Only one can decide, please rise.

As Judge John Hodgman enters the courtroom and presents an obscure cultural reference.

Yeah, I made a paper mache walrus, I made a scoped rion, and then I thought if I can

make whatever I want, why not make a creature that doesn't exist?

So I made a unicorn.

Summertime, fun time, guest bailiff Monty Belmonti, please swear the litigants in.

Michelle and Rob, please rise.

Rob, raise your hour hand.

Michelle, raise your minute hand.

Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you

cogsworth from beauty in the beast, or that glow in the dark doors poster I had in my

...