Hello, everybody and welcome to the bitch Bible podcast, Leo, I can't do this with you today.

It's too late in life for Yulin jokes.

That's not going to fare well.

Hi, everyone.

And welcome to the Bitch Bible podcast.

I am so cold.

Jackie, why are you bundled up and you look like Amelia Earhart?

I'm freezing to death.

I'm just so skinny and gaunt. except I'm not. I'm bloated and

miserable. I am day three of what could only be described as a Daniel Day Lewis, there will be

blood, gladiator period that is rocking me to my core. Somebody call Home Depot and clear out the

tarp aisle because I am slipping and sliding and not in a good way. I said last week that my

goal for this year, my resolution, if you will, resolution, is to be bitchier and

cuntier. And then the universe said, here you go, Jackie. We're going to give you a super tanker

of a period and watchy pop off. Also, I would like to acknowledge something else because

in the spirit of transparency and

cuntiness I am wearing I just got these delivered from Amazon when I was in Paris

I bought these beautiful Tom Ford kind of like aviator shield glasses that I really thought

I was about to pop off the pages of life

with, okay?

I don't know what happened.

I bought them at the airport before I left, and I think I left them in the airplane or

...