Monte Belmonte Python

Judge John Hodgman

Jesse Thorn

World, Show, Complete, Hodgeman, Comedy, Pc, Daily, Hodgman, Mac, More, Expertise, Knowledge, Information

4.8 • 7.7K Ratings

🗓️ 25 July 2014

⏱️ 68 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Beth loves animals and wants to get a pet snake, but her husband is opposed to slithery things.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm your guest, Baylev, Monty Bell Monty from WRSI
0:06.7	939 The River and North Hampton, Massachusetts in for Jesse Thorn. This week, strangely,
0:15.1	Monty Bell Monty Python. Beth brings the case against her partner Ross. She loves animals and wants
0:21.8	to get a small snake to keep in her workshop. Ross says snakes are disgusting and terrifying and
0:28.0	thinks they should be satisfied with the animals they already have. Who's right? And who would
0:33.6	the sorting hat put in Slytherin? Only one man can decide. Please rise as Judge John Jake the
0:40.8	snake Hodgman enters the courtroom. Snakes are among the most misunderstood of all animals.
0:48.3	As a result, many beneficial and harmless snakes have met untimely deaths at the hands of shovel
0:54.0	wielding humans. Observe snakes from a respectful distance. Don't attempt to capture them
1:00.4	or keep wild snakes as pets. Leave snakes alone. And with that, guest, Summer Baylev,
1:10.1	Monty Bell Monty, please swear them in. Beth and Ross, please rise and raise your right hands.
1:16.7	Beware to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth to help you Medusa's head.
1:20.7	I do. I do. You swear to abide by Judge John Hodgman's ruling despite the fact that the
1:27.6	judge is sick and tired of all these monkey fighting snakes on this Monday to Friday plane.
1:31.9	Yes, I do. I do that as well. Thank you, Judge Hodgman, you may proceed.
1:39.1	Monty fighting. That is the actual what made for TV translation of the epic line from snakes on a
1:45.5	plane. Right. Monty fighting snakes on this Monday to Friday plane. But I'm sorry about this. Beth
1:54.0	and Ross, you may be seated. Is not the original quote I am tired of these mother snakes on this
2:00.0	mother plane? Yeah, but instead of bleeping it out, I thought I would go with the made for TV movie
2:05.2	original. No, no, no, I understand. Yeah. And I'm very glad you mean the TV the TV edit. The TV
2:10.5	does TV edit. Yeah. So you're telling me that they replaced the term mother with two different
2:18.1	yes options monkey fighting snakes on this Monday to Friday plane. What who did why didn't they
	...

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