the

hey what's going on it's bill burr and it's time for the Monday morning podcast for Monday

uh

Monday uh

May 30th, 2022

sorry man I just had a double espresso that's my new shit man it's my new shit it's fucking leave a cocaine

I don't have a problem um oh double shot of espresso on Memorial Day everybody come on

sing it with me happy Memorial Day to you happy Memorial Day to you because you didn't

take the time to thank the troops you just went to a barbecue and you ate a bunch of shit

and you got some mantids and you felt a tightness in your chest so you made yourself puke

in the shrubs and your buddies wife saw it all right sorry that's always the worst you

know we do something dumb and your buddies wife sees it you know like yeah god do I wait

for her version and then I tell my version I tell my version first you know you got

to wait you got to wait you know what's annoying I was just walking down the street by

I don't know and I was mine in my own business you know it really annoys me I don't like

when a woman dresses seductively but isn't confident is there anything worse than that

because then you're walking past them and they have this uncomfortable look on their face

and it fucking makes you feel like a creep and it's like I didn't tell you to dress like

that and I wasn't even looking at you stop fucking making that face like I'm leering at you

I'm just gonna say hello you're the one who wore a fucking half shirt it's fucking breezy

out you know put a whole shirt on put a whole shirt on until you can walk down the street

you got to be like Beyonce so you got to dress like that you got to fucking be walking

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