Monday Morning Podcast 4-1-13
Monday Morning Podcast
All Things Comedy
4.7 • 34.1K Ratings
🗓️ 1 April 2013
⏱️ 63 minutes
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| 0:00.0 | Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burr and it's the Monday morning podcast for Monday, April |
| 0:07.1 | 1st, 2013. That's right, everybody. It's April Fool's Day. Holy shit. Is this podcast |
| 0:15.4 | going to be wacky? Is he going to pull a prank? Is he pranking us right now? Is that |
| 0:20.7 | his voice? I would say you guys so much I fucking hate this day. You know what I mean? |
| 0:28.0 | Back when I was in the matrix and I actually had a day job and I was a productive member |
| 0:32.6 | of society. You know, and I actually used to sit there and I'd go to fucking work every |
| 0:39.9 | goddamn day and every once in a while at the end of the day. They'd say some shit like, |
| 0:47.6 | you know, we'd appreciate it. It's not mandatory, but we would appreciate it if you guys could |
| 0:53.0 | hang around for a couple of minutes after five today. We'd like to talk about some of |
| 0:58.3 | our productivity goals in the upcoming quarter. And I would actually hang out going, I got |
| 1:06.4 | to do this. I got to put on a, I got to put on a, you know, I got to be a team player |
| 1:13.1 | here and I would sit there and listen to these fucking suits. You know, talking about, |
| 1:20.3 | you know, unloading trucks or whatever the fuck they were talking about and oh, that |
| 1:24.7 | is interesting. Oh, that's great. Oh, are we going to upgrade to the electronic fucking |
| 1:28.8 | pallet jacks? Palet jacks? I haven't said pallet jacks in like fucking 25 years. We were |
| 1:36.0 | all excited. Wow. They really give a shit about us. Now they know they just worried they're |
| 1:40.6 | going to get sued because the fucking coca just blew out his goddamn back. You know, |
| 1:46.0 | and then they're like, well, what if everybody blows out their backs? How do we avoid that? |
| 1:51.2 | What is going to be cheaper? Paying their workman's comp or actually getting them the proper |
| 1:55.9 | equipment? So anyways, the stupid fucking April fool's jokes, right? I say those fucking |
| 2:03.7 | goddamned. You know, I hated about it was half the people who would get you. They weren't |
| 2:09.2 | funny and they they're this is their idea. You know, be like, they'd be like, hey, do you |
... |
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