Minisode Monday #80 | How to Ask Questions That Uncover Motivation

The Art of Charm

http://www.TheArtOfCharm.com

Business, Health & Fitness, Education

4.7 • 11K Ratings

🗓️ 20 November 2017

⏱️ 3 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. Are you trying to understand the motivation behind someone's alleged actions? Here's an exercise from episode 651 guest Frank Sesno, author of Ask More: The Power of Questions to Open Doors, Uncover Solutions, and Spark Change. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: As a hypothetical scenario, imagine you're in charge of prosecuting someone charged with plagiarism. Simply asking if the subject is guilty is pointless -- they've already denied it. Instead, write down ten questions that are less directly confrontational. Examples: Why would somebody possibly do something like this? Why spend time doing something like this? Who would have the resources to do something like this? What resources do you think this person might have used? Would this have been difficult to do if you had been guilty and done it? Who might have wanted to make it look like you did it? What other plausible explanations are there? Asking these kinds of questions is a great way to figure out someone's motivations as well as getting them to build a narrative for you. Coming up with these types of questions -- even if you don't end up needing to ask them -- helps you think inside, outside, and underneath for a more complete picture of any scenario. To learn more about social dynamics and productivity hacks, take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. Also be sure to check out our Social Capital Intensive here! Let us know about how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response or write to Jordan directly: [email protected] (he actually reads everything)! Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/minisode-monday-80-ask-questions-uncover-motivation/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. We'll take you step by step to becoming better at making personal and professional connections, becoming a better networker, increasing your personal social capital and charisma. This is for both men and women! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Listen to The Art of Charm, Adam and Dr. Drew Show, and hundreds of your favorite podcasts with the free PodcastOne app (on iOS and Android) here! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey, Jordan Harbanger here from the Art of Charm. Welcome to Miniso and Monday, your weekly
0:05.0	shot of personal development espresso. I'm really happy to be here with you. I actually
0:09.3	hate espresso. I got to change that. I'm happy to be here with you kicking off the
0:12.1	week with something quick and actionable that you can implement right away that'll make
0:16.1	you better at what you do every single day. It'll make you more magnetic. It'll make you
0:20.2	more effective. And today's one comes from the the annals of AOC episodes. This one's
0:26.8	from Frank Cessnau back in episode 651. So here's an exercise. It's from the back of the
0:32.1	book, Ask More, which has tons of stuff like this. So if you're on the fence about that book
0:36.0	for some reason, this will help you put you over on the other side. So here's the drill.
0:40.6	A student turns in a paper and you're a professor. It's about the Amazon rainforest and the
0:45.6	ecosystem. Some automated system shows that she's lifted huge sections of the paper from
0:51.5	an encyclopedia. You are the committee head and you have to prosecute her. Write down
0:57.2	10 questions. Don't ask directly if she did it. That's been done. Of course she denied
1:02.0	it. This encourages you to ask around and underneath the story. So here are some example
1:06.9	questions. Why would somebody possibly do something like this? Why spend time doing something
1:13.2	like this? Who would have the resources to do something like this? What resources do
1:18.9	you think this person might have used? Would this plagiarism have been difficult to do
1:24.2	if you had been guilty and done it? Who might have wanted to make it look like you did it?
1:30.5	And what other plausible explanations are there for what's happening here? So this is a
1:35.3	great way to figure out motivations as well as getting someone to build a narrative for
1:41.2	you. This isn't just useful if you're a police interrogator because whenever that I thought
1:45.1	first, all right, this is some police stuff. I think every parent is probably lighting up
	...

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