How to Move On When You Still Miss Your Ex (4 Hard Truths That Will FINALLY Set You Free)
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
iHeartPodcasts
4.8 • 28.5K Ratings
🗓️ 14 November 2025
⏱️ 27 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
What truth about the relationship have you been ignoring?
What makes that truth hard for you to accept?
Today, Jay opens up about one of the hardest things we go through, trying to get over someone we once loved. He reminds us that healing isn’t about pretending we’re okay or trying to move on too quickly. It’s about realizing that what we often miss isn’t the person themselves, but how we felt when we were with them: seen, loved, and alive. Jay gently walks us through why breakups hurt so deeply, how our minds are built for connection, and why finding closure really starts with reconnecting to ourselves.
Jay also shares how to stop replaying the past and start finding your rhythm again. He reminds us that healing isn’t about erasing the love, it’s about learning from it. You don’t need to have it all figured out today, you just need to take one small step back toward yourself. Because the real journey after a breakup isn’t about getting over someone else, it’s about remembering who you were before them, and discovering who you’re becoming next.
In this episode, you'll learn:
How to Stop Romanticizing the Past
How to Let Go When You Still Miss Them
How to Rebuild Your Life After a Breakup
How to Move On Without Losing Yourself
How to Remember You Were Enough All Along
You are not broken for still feeling; you are human for still caring. One day, the memories that hurt will simply remind you of how far you’ve come. Keep showing up for yourself, because the love you’re searching for begins with you.
With Love and Gratitude,
Jay Shetty
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What We Discuss:
00:00 Intro
00:53 The Heartbreak After the Breakup
01:24 What to Do When You Can't Get Over Your Ex
05:07 Why Do Breakups Hurt So Bad?
07:52 The Stories You Replay Are Keeping You Stuck
08:39 Myth #1: Time Doesn’t Heal Everything
10:16 Myth #2: Why Closure Isn’t the Answer
13:12 Myth #3: Moving On Doesn’t Mean You Didn’t Care
15:12 Myth #4: Why Getting Back Together Won’t Fix It
17:26 Step #1: The First Step to Real Healing
19:12 Step #2: It’s Okay Not to Be Okay!
20:05 Step #3: Rebuild the Rituals That Ground You
21:14 Step #4: Ask Better Questions to Help You Grow
22:37 Step #5: Turn Your Pain Into Purpose
24:02 What to Do When You Fall Back
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This is an I-Heart podcast. |
| 0:02.3 | Guaranteed Human. |
| 0:04.3 | Healing starts when you focus on the feeling, not the person, |
| 0:09.1 | and you focus on how you can give yourself that feeling without that person, |
| 0:14.4 | how you can create that emotion and that experience for yourself that you deserve without that person, that you can find that |
| 0:23.7 | connection with yourself and others without that person. When you think that that person is more |
| 0:32.0 | powerful than an experience or an emotion, you will never be able to let go. The number one health and wellness podcast. |
| 0:40.5 | Jay Shetty. Jay Shetty. He won. The only. Jay Shetty. Hey, everyone. Welcome back to On Purpose. It's |
| 0:49.0 | Jay Shetty, your host. If you haven't subscribed yet, please do. It will mean the world to me. |
| 0:54.1 | And make sure you never miss out on an upload. If you haven't subscribed yet, please do. It will mean the world to me and make sure you never |
| 0:55.7 | miss out on an upload. If you've recently gone through a breakup or you've been through a breakup, |
| 1:02.0 | maybe even a couple of years ago, but it still affects you, this video is for you. So many people |
| 1:08.0 | I know right now have been dumped, broken up with, disconnected, and it started |
| 1:13.9 | to affect their self-esteem. If you've ever questioned your value after a breakup, if you've |
| 1:19.0 | ever questioned whether you're worthy of love, if you've ever questioned whether you'll ever |
| 1:23.2 | find love, don't skip this video. I want to start off by talking to you about what you actually miss |
| 1:30.9 | because I'm sure your mind is coming up with all sorts of things like you miss the text in the |
| 1:36.8 | morning. You miss the conversation before you went to bed. You miss the dates you went out on. |
| 1:42.7 | And it's really interesting because when you're focusing on |
| 1:44.7 | everything you miss, you actually miss that you have forgotten all the bad times, right? You miss |
| 1:51.3 | moments that they treated you badly. And I don't mean you missed them like you won them back. |
| 1:56.4 | You missed them as a you completely forget they existed. But here's the real thing you miss. You don't miss them. |
... |
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