The world is full of tours.

But you don't choose a Toyota truck to follow the beaten path.

You choose it to find the places in between.

The detours, where each adventure pulls you toward the next.

And wrong turns to not right. So why would you ever take a tour when you could take

a detour? Toyota trucks. When you get into a relationship that you know is good for you and that can

heal you, no one's going to throw chairs. I trust that we're going to fight without

fighting. And this is a good thing. I feel safe. But it's not exciting. It's not the, and we'll get into

trauma bonds later, but there's something about this that feels flat. And a lot of people bounce very

fast because of that. But I feel like if you play it out on the other side of that, because what I think you're doing is reconditioning your body, right?

And this can actually become a home, a safe space.

If after you get there, it's still flat and you just see this person as a friend,

that's different. And I know that can be confusing, but I think in relationship, you can actually

heal by making smarter choices, even if it doesn't feel as exciting as young love.

I'm John Kim, a licensed therapist who used to be a miserable fuck before going on a hero's journey

and turning expired relationships into revelations.

I use my story to help others come with you instead of at you, unrehearsed on purpose,

because self-help doesn't have to be polished or complicated just honest

this may be a little bit kind of um off topic but so when you get into because you were

talking about the sticky yesterday a little bit when you get into a relationship that you know is good for you

and that can heal you, no one's going to throw chairs, I trust that we're going to fight

without fighting, and this is a good thing, I feel safe. But it's not exciting. It's not

...