Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm Bill of Jesse Thorn.

This week, hostile fitness. Heather brings the case against her husband, Joe. Joe is too

competitive with Heather's mother when she initiates challenges with him through a fitness tracking

app they both use. Because of this, he's chosen to opt out of her challenges. Heather thinks

these fitness challenges are a good way for them to engage and wants him to play along.

Who's right? Who's wrong? Only one man can decide. Please rise as Judge John Hodgman

enters the courtroom and presents an obscure cultural reference.

And they took off their bracelets? I suppose they did, Bob said. Bracelets wouldn't have

been much used to them in places like that, would they? With no scanners to put them

to? Jesus said they did something called fighting. Bob looked away and then back again.

Being aggressively is a nicer way of putting it. He said, yes, they did that. Chip looked

up at him, but they're dead now. He said, yes, said Bob, all dead. Every last one of them.

Bill of Jesse Thorn, swear them in. Please rise and raise your right hands. Do you

swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God or

whatever? I do. I do. Do you swear to abide by Judge John Hodgman's ruling, despite

the fact that he has people who exercise for him? I do. Very well, Judge Hodgman. Thank

you, Bill of Jesse. Heather and Joe, you may be seated for an immediate summary judgment

in one of your favors. Can either of you please name the piece of culture that I quoted

from as I entered the courtroom. Joe, you have been brought to this court by Heather against

your will, so you may either guess first or decide that Heather should guess first. What

is your choice? I'll decide that Heather should guess first. Ah, the cowards way out, Joe.

Perhaps you'll get some information that will help you make a correct guess. Heather, what

...