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Chris Distefano Presents: Chrissy Chaos

Getting Roasted for Not Knowing Basic Life Skills | Chris Distefano is Chrissy Chaos

Chris Distefano Presents: Chrissy Chaos

Chris Distefano

Comedy, Comedy Interviews

4.62.8K Ratings

🗓️ 15 April 2026

⏱️ 62 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

#ChrisDistefano #StandUp #Comedy Chrissy Chaos is back and this time the Reverse Advice Hotline delivers. Chrissy and Vito talk weight loss, weird food habits, David Cross, Jasmin’s birthday, home ownership stress, and then open the lines for fans to tell Chrissy exactly how to fix his life. The callers do not disappoint. Chrissy gets roasted for not knowing tools, told to stop moving, pushed into “man bootcamp,” and somehow ends up in a full debate about confidence, dating, daughters, and whether he can survive adulthood. Absolute chaos from start to finish. Subscribe for more Chrissy Chaos and drop a comment with your best advice for Chrissy. Timestamps 00:00 Chrissy’s new look, the lights, and the Reverse Advice Hotline 01:21 Chrissy’s weight loss, peptides, protein yogurt, and avocado talk 04:40 Vito’s banana disaster and getting diarrhea from Chrissy 05:37 Jasmine’s birthday problem and why Chrissy needs help 06:15 David Cross, fake voicemail chaos, and comedian stories 08:58 House stress, money pressure, and Delilah manipulating basketball time 11:11 Reverse Advice Hotline begins 11:32 Jacob calls in and tells Chrissy to buy tools 16:34 Tool talk turns completely insane 20:28 Von says Chrissy has to stop moving 25:31 Arizona, the original 13 colonies, and saving Atlanta over Chicago 27:20 Elise creates “man bootcamp” for Chrissy 29:32 Can Chrissy actually change a tire? 33:42 Jasmine birthday advice from Elise 37:42 Nick calls in with the wildest confidence boost of the episode 41:11 Group chat recap: tools, confidence, and total insanity 46:05 Chrissy tries to figure out Jasmine’s actual birthday plan 48:58 Ireland trip debate: nanny or mom? 53:58 Trump, the Pope, and late-show chaos 58:28 Who should Chrissy call next? 🙆🏼‍♂️ Chris Distefano Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/chrisdcomedy/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/chrisdcomedy Website - https://www.chrisdcomedy.com/ 🎥 Vito Calise - Producer Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/SweedishFishMafia 🎤More Chris D Comedy Website: https://www.chrisdcomedy.com/ Live Dates: https://www.chrisdcomedy.com/#tickets Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

Don't you wish everything was more rewarding?

0:03.4

With Raccutin, almost everything is.

0:05.9

You can earn cash back on those new shoes you've been wanting.

0:09.1

You can save on the next trip you book.

0:11.6

You can cash in on groceries.

0:13.8

Just join.

0:15.0

Shop your favorite brands and save.

0:17.5

Sephora, boots, Argus, Timu, Adidas, Trip.com.

0:23.2

The list is long.

0:25.0

Save online at over 550 stores.

0:28.3

And when it's time to redeem those rewards, get your money exactly how you want it.

0:33.0

Choose bank transfer or PayPal.

0:35.6

So go ahead, take a trip, fill a cart, get a new outfit. Recutin is a world

0:42.1

of rewards. Join today for free. Go to recutin.co.c.com or get the app. That's R-A-K-U-T-E-N.

0:54.8

All right.

0:55.9

What's up, everybody?

0:57.0

Welcome to another episode of Chrissy Chaos.

0:59.9

We are here.

1:00.6

This is week three or week four.

1:02.4

We are back.

1:03.1

Now, not only do we have audio, not only do we have video, now we have lights, baby.

1:08.3

We got the lights from the basement and they work. And Vito and I lifted them up the stairs and I'm at a 14.2 on my whoop strain. Even though Whoop is not a sponsor, I'm wearing whoop. I'm Chrissy Whoop. I'm a Whoopie pie. I'm wearing baggy pants. Okay? So I just want you to know that this is the new me. The new me is now I'm wearing a hat and I'm wearing baggy jeans

...

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