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Monday Morning Podcast

Garage Doors, Rulers, The Future | Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 1-22-26

Monday Morning Podcast

All Things Comedy

Comedy

4.734.1K Ratings

🗓️ 23 January 2026

⏱️ 141 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Bill rambles about his garage door, the rulers, and the future.

(00:00) - Thursday Afternoon Podcast

(30:13) - Thursday Afternoon Throwback 1-22-18 - Bill rambles about the Patriots, kids, and self preservation.

(01:42:08) - Anything Better NFL Championship Preview  - Only three games left!  Bill and Paul go into Championship weekend having gone 3-4 a piece during the divisional games.  

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Transcript

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0:00.0

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0:41.1

This is not investment advice in trading crypto involves risk. Check Gemini's website for more details on rates and fees. Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burden. It's time for the Thursday afternoon

0:46.2

just before Friday, Monday morning podcast, and I'm just checking in on you. Ooh, what's going on?

0:55.6

How's your week going?

0:57.6

How are you doing?

0:58.2

Are you starting fights with everybody in the fucking world like this country seems to be doing?

1:05.0

Why are we doing this?

1:06.0

I don't watch the news anymore.

1:07.0

That's all I'm hearing.

1:07.9

All of Europe wants to fight us now.

1:09.5

Is that true?

1:10.0

We're trying to say Greenland. For what? For what? What does he want to put a golf course up there? You want to go

1:19.3

get the oil? Is Greenland a threat to us? What are they doing now? It's unreal. It's unreal.

1:27.1

I can't tell you this. Having traveled the

1:28.8

world, one of the moves that a leader likes to do when they don't know what they're doing is just

1:34.6

constantly be starting fires. That way, all the people are just watching the fire trucks go

1:40.4

down the street and they're looking at the fire and they never look at him. That's what's going on.

1:43.8

That's what I think's going on. Or it's a narcissist dealing with,

1:48.7

you know, they're at the end of the road. And the one thing a narcissist can't deal with is their

1:52.8

own mortality, which has got to be infuriating for them. So it's just like, well, you know,

1:59.2

if I'm going to pass on, you know, I'm fucking

2:05.3

taking everybody with me. These people are going to remember me. It's unreal. It's really ironic that all

...

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