Flightless Birds, New Music, Breath Work | Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 1-15-26
Monday Morning Podcast
All Things Comedy
4.8 • 32.8K Ratings
🗓️ 15 January 2026
⏱️ 145 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Bill rambles about flightless birds, new music, and breathwork.
(00:00) - Thursday Afternoon Podcast
(29:51) - Thursday Afternoon Throwback - Bill rambles about the Mall Of America, quarterback names, and ex wives.
(01:30:39) - Anything Better Divisional Playoff Preview - Bill and Paul both went 5-1 on Wild Card Weekend. They talk about this week's Divisional Rounds, and more appropriately named teams.
Coast: Coast Pay is offering our listeners free gas for a day when you get started at http://www.coastpay.com/BURR
Butcher Box: Your choice of filet mignon, New York strip, or ribeye in every box for an entire year, plus $20 off your first box, and free shipping always http://www.ButcherBox.com/BURR
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burr, and it's time for the Thursday afternoon just before Friday, Monday morning podcast, and I'm just checking in on you. |
| 0:12.0 | Woo! |
| 0:13.6 | I'm sitting here in my living room right now. The TV has on its screen, Saver! |
| 0:29.3 | And this is what I don't understand. Part of the screen saver is it looks like a school of barracuda. Ooh, barracuda, right? And here's my thing. I don't think I've ever seen |
| 0:35.9 | like predators. |
| 0:40.5 | They're usually by themselves. |
| 0:43.4 | Bears, snakes. |
| 0:47.3 | Fucking. |
| 0:49.0 | What else is a predator out there? |
| 0:50.9 | I don't know. |
| 0:51.3 | Mountain lions? |
| 0:56.3 | They're usually like, hey, man, you know, |
| 1:01.6 | they sort of look, they respect each other. There's territories. Hey, I'm doing, this is my territory. I kill over here. This is my shit. That's your shit. I mean, I guess there's a |
| 1:07.2 | pride of lions. They're codependent. Cheetahs usually got a couple, two, or three. |
| 1:12.7 | Coyotes also. But coyotes and cheetahs are smaller. So you figure, you know, they need to do the |
| 1:21.4 | gang tackle, right, to bring something down. But, you know, great white sharks that by themselves. Killer whales. I don't know. |
| 1:31.8 | But there's like, dude, there's like a fucking thousand of them. Serial killers, by themselves, |
| 1:41.0 | maybe one other person. That's a hell of a conversation, trying to get somebody on the same page. |
| 1:47.1 | How do you know it's okay to bring that up? |
| 1:51.8 | I'm like, oh, God, I'm starving. |
| 1:53.6 | I could actually eat a person right now, and then you kind of throw it out there. |
| 1:58.2 | The other person kind of lights up like, yeah, you know, that ankle bone, mean, isn't... |
... |
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