Hey guys, my name is John Kim. I'm a licensed therapist and life coach putting

self betterment into a shot class because let's face it who's got that much time

these days. I come unpolished, unrehearsed, on purpose.

If you're looking for more of a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place.

A lot of sticky happens because we don't have a life and by sticky I mean

co-dependency, emeshment, jealousy control.

I want to let you know that no one owns the relationship and I think this is one of the greatest misconceptions and it's not something that we

are maybe consciously thinking and it's a slow drip right it happens

over time no one goes into a relationship thinking thinking they own it's that's not what I'm saying

it's not what happens but you get into a relationship and you start to lose your life, right?

And slowly, and so the relationship kind of becomes your life, right?

It becomes the sun that you revolve around and if that's the case then if something goes wrong in the relationship or if there's some kind of conflict, then it means the world because that becomes your life. And when this happens, we start to lose ourselves

in the relationship, and this is so common.

Remember, you're sharing your life with your partner.

You are not exchanging your life for your partner.

One of the things that I say the most as a relationship coach

is to get a life.

And I don't mean that in a dickish kind of way.

I mean it sincerely.

I think so many of us fall into a relationship and lose our own

lives we actually have a responsibility to carve out our own life for the relationship to thrive, right?

So many of us depend solely on our relationship and that relationship to bring us joy and happiness that we start to lose ourselves

...