Episode 71 - Dick on Being Toxic

The Dick Show

Dick Masterson

Dickmasterson, Biggestproblemintheuniverse, Comedy

4.8 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 10 October 2017

⏱️ 100 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Gun Week, Shark Week, GIF vs. JIF, why everything is "toxic", give me a hobby or give me death, the gratuitous lols of online creeps, Schrödinger's Racist, not taking chick sports reporters seriously enough, a flowchart of crappy gun arguments, the time I got Harvey Weinerstein'ed, Bill Guy the Science Dude is back, the lackluster money shot of a Rick and Morty finale, the Wheel of Fortune National Anthem, Maddox misses a trademark deadline, wedding invitations, a new way to talk to people, and the average man is illegal; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Transcript

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0:00.0	Presenting Dick. Dick.
0:14.0	Ready.
0:15.0	Yeah!
0:17.0	Yeah! Yeah!
0:20.0	He!
0:22.0	H! Welcome to Dick.
0:24.0	You need Dick.
0:25.0	You want to take you love Dick.
0:26.0	It's the only show, you got it's the only show where everything is a contest.
0:30.0	Coming to you live from a mountain bunker
0:32.0	deep in the heart of the city of failure.
0:34.4	I'm your host Dick Masterson. With me as always is Sean the audio engineer. Hi Dick, what's up? engineer
0:48.1	I Dick what's up buddy what's that's I'm gonna do it what the audio engineer part Yeah, it was like you became like Bruce buffer. Yeah man this is the shitty buffer you fuck, you fucking asshole. That's the buffer that does
0:56.2	you FC. And like, you know, that fucking guy, like he gets up there and does an impression of his brother but you can tell that he's like he still is making it his own.
1:07.0	Oh yeah, it's like dude just do the fucking impression.
1:10.0	It's funny you can tell I've watched a lot more MMA than boxing.
1:13.0	That Mike, that's, I forgot it.
1:15.0	Bruce buffer just pops out.
1:17.0	I meant, yes, I meant as a Michael buffer.
1:19.0	I know that you meant to do it because that's the shitty one.
1:22.0	Yeah, that is the shitty one. That's the shitty one. Yeah, that is the shitty one.
1:24.0	Yeah.
	...

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