meta_pixel
Tapesearch Logo
Log in
The Dick Show

Episode 64 - Dick on Platitudes

The Dick Show

Dick Masterson

Dickmasterson, Biggestproblemintheuniverse, Comedy

4.81.3K Ratings

🗓️ 22 August 2017

⏱️ 112 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

A really bad mood, a plethora of positive platitudes, throat bubbles, the stupid eclipse, UTIs or UT-lies, the Confederacy, a parody song from Hazencruz, a flatulent erotic story, virtual book burning, theme park revisionism and the eternal present, Nazis and chicks looking for free dinners, Mayweather v. McGregor, me v. The Mystery Box, the time I tried to make a movie with Edward James Olmos, the masterpeen, Mexican vocabulary, the LA show, a voicemail threatens to destroy me, and a doctoral thesis in armchair psychology when a girl wants to look at your phone; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Presenting Dick. Dick. Yeah! Yeah!

0:26.5

Welcome to Dick! You want Dick, you need Dick, you love Dick, you got it.

0:29.4

It's the only show where everything is a contest coming to you live from a mountain bunker deep in the

0:36.6

heart of the city of failure. I'm your hostickmasterson with a bubble in my throat man that is that that makes me let me start with that

0:49.6

rage with me as always Sean the audio engineer. Hello Dick.

0:53.2

What's up buddy?

0:54.4

Man the bubble in your throat.

0:56.4

You've got it and you...

0:58.0

When you're in the middle of a normal conversation,

1:00.6

because everything is a blind panic to get what you're thinking out before some

1:06.1

asshole tries to stump you and interrupt you and lead it take take you off in their

1:12.1

direction.

1:13.0

It's a big tug of war at all times,

1:17.0

pulling you in the direction that they want the conversation to go,

1:20.6

and you get that bubble in your throat that's just building and

1:24.1

building like a nuclear reactor ready to go off approaching that

1:29.7

criticality of that point where you think it's just gonna spray out of your throat, spray out of

1:36.3

your body like in, like in the, like in the exorcist.

1:40.3

You're just sitting there having a normal fucking conversation and the...

1:44.0

I don't know why we all think it's going to go away, the bubble in your throat.

1:48.0

I'll just power through it.

1:50.0

It's not going away.

...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Dick Masterson, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Dick Masterson and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.

Copyright © Tapesearch 2025.