Welcome to Wolf 359. This is the audio log of communications officer Doug Eiffel, recording from the Combs Room of the

U.S.S. of Vesta Station. It is day 490 of our orbit around Wolf 359.

How are you today, dear listeners?

Everything as it should be in your lives?

It's a beautiful day here on the far side of our red dwarf star,

and I...

I feel great.

You know, this will come as a shock to most of you, but I've been known to on rare occasion, be a tiny bit of a downer.

I don't make a point of it, but once a blue moon I've given into the temptation to just for a second

See things on the glass half empty side just a little

But no more that Doug Eiffel is dead. The new me, Doug Eiffel 2.0 is a changed man.

A man who's ready to look on the bright, sunshiny side, even though I'm still bored out of my skull,

and I've got this stupid skin rash that's driving me nuts.

But anyway, happy thoughts, for example,

something wonderful happened two days ago.

And speaking of that,

Hi, Dr. Hilbert.

Officer Eiffel, how are you tonight?

Fantastic, Doctor.

Does you're stopping by me and I get my...

Dose for the day?

Your cough has gotten worse since yesterday.

...