Episode 493 - Dick on ICE on Ice

The Dick Show

Dick Masterson

Comedy

4.7 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 10 January 2026

⏱️ 121 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Royce from "Revenge of the Cis" is in studio! A woman is killed on ice by ICE, the "I'm just a girl" defense, Dan Boingo spergs out, Quirk Chungus, breaking into day care, Time Crisis, fighting with your brother, infiltrating the Plus Size Park Hopper gang, and a Super Size Fat Watch; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Transcript

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0:00.0	Here we go.
0:01.4	Here we go.
0:02.3	I know where there's a hammer.
0:04.7	I got to have one within reach.
0:06.7	A lot used to go on in this studio.
0:10.0	Like, it used to be a very dynamic place.
0:12.0	It's things getting smashed and, you know.
0:15.5	Now you settle down.
0:16.5	What happened to you, man?
0:17.6	You've changed, man.
0:18.7	I've changed, man.
0:20.7	I love that one. Dix's a different guy. Like, yeah, fucking 46 now. So you're different. I'm like, yeah, man, I own a house. Leave me alone. Like, I have a life. What do you want from me? You're half the size of you. Yeah, I know. How do you even? The retard part of me left. I feel like I'm meeting a new guy.
0:38.2	I know.
0:38.5	I got to kind of re-get to know you.
0:40.0	I run into people that look at me and goes, oh, fuck, I even know it was you.
0:42.6	I'm like, yeah, I know.
0:43.6	I know.
0:43.8	What's a fat piece of shit? Your eyes are too big now. They used to be just the right size. Now, now they're humongous.
0:48.6	Hold on, watch.
0:50.6	Now you're like that black guy,
0:52.0	and from the 90s,
0:52.9	it would go like boop.
	...

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