Episode 212 - Dick on Plantation Simulator

The Dick Show

Dick Masterson

Dickmasterson, Biggestproblemintheuniverse, Comedy

4.8 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 23 June 2020

⏱️ 171 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

A week of LA Killstreams, Sophia Narwitz on the Minneapolis riots, Jesse Lee Peterson offers to marry me, back to Pilates, how fat women got on lockdown, throwing my neck out looking at boobs, Plantation Simulator, Tommy Tallarico and the Earthworm Jim Amico, the Macy's beatdown, statues getting ripped down, The Last of Us: Part 2, twin trouble, girls who want to see other people and think about themselves, and how to celebrate Father's Day; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Transcript

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0:00.0	What do you think's going on? Meanwhile, I got Jesse Lee Peterson in my other ear telling me I've got to marry my girlfriend as quickly as possible and start having white babies enough to fill up a truck.
0:12.0	Jesse Lee Peterson. white babies enough to fill up a truck.
0:12.6	Jesse Lee Peterson.
0:14.3	Yeah, the minister, Jesse
0:16.8	Lee Peterson that I, he sat here for fucking,
0:19.4	he sat where Ralph sitting right now for three hours and tried to, oh God, I got
0:23.7	really accidentally fucked up the recording. He sat and where Ralph's sitting for
0:26.6	three hours and tried to convince me to marry my girlfriend. Did you spend the
0:31.1	next hour smelling the seat when he left?
0:33.0	Sean, what the hell is that?
0:38.0	On this Jun on this Juneteenth month, you're making these kinds of
0:41.0	I'm just I don't know I don't even know what that means. making these kinds of racially inappropriate jokes.
0:43.0	I don't know. I don't even know what that means.
0:45.3	What does it mean?
0:46.2	Are you saying I want to shove my nose up his assholes?
0:49.2	It just sounded like a gross thing to say. Yeah, it is because you like sat there for like an hour, you know,
0:55.0	sat there for hours.
0:56.0	Hours.
0:57.0	I was like, I don't know.
0:58.0	I don't know what the dude looks like.
0:59.0	Because I can't smell him over the stench of IPA in this.
1:02.0	I know.
	...

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