Episode 179 - The Stand Before Time
The Offensive
2018/19 Season
4.8 • 739 Ratings
🗓️ 20 March 2023
⏱️ 22 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Ashwood City Football Club are hit by the news that the fabled iBET Stand has collapsed. The club hierarchy and local council clash over who's to blame.
Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan
Helena Doughty as Jess Tate
Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall
Joel Emery as Dan Watson
Additional Voices:
Thomas Mitchells
Natalie Green
Nalan Burgess
Episode written by:
Joel Emery
Edited by:
Adam Jarrell
Directed by:
Adam Jarrell
Executive Producer:
Joel Emery
With thanks to:
The Ashwood City Season Ticket Holders & Shareholders
WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.
This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.
Listener discretion is advised.
The Offensive is property of Primley Limited.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Financial beasts have plagued our village. |
| 0:04.8 | Come, family, we must flee. |
| 0:07.4 | Or they will take our very homes away from us. |
| 0:10.7 | Come, we must flee. |
| 0:12.8 | A rider approaching from the north. |
| 0:15.8 | Who goes there? |
| 0:17.7 | State your business. |
| 0:20.5 | Fear not, my friends, for it is I, credit master. Behold! In my hand, I hold the key to your financial world. |
| 0:33.6 | Our credit cards offer a 34.9% APR. |
| 0:40.4 | With a range between £215,000, you are all guaranteed to be accepted. |
| 0:48.1 | Yes. |
| 0:49.3 | There's no hidden fees or nasty disguises. |
| 0:52.1 | Now you can pay your bills in the cost of living crisis. This is a vehicle you need |
| 0:56.4 | to save you from the strife. |
| 0:58.2 | Spend it on yourself or maybe even |
| 1:00.0 | treat the wife. With this card you'll go from famine |
| 1:02.3 | all the way to feast. |
| 1:04.1 | Use it with all your might to slay |
| 1:05.9 | financial beats. After joining us, you'll thank |
| 1:08.1 | yourselves every single day. |
| 1:09.8 | Now I have to go and spread the word. I'm on my merry way. |
| 1:12.6 | For now we all rejoice in pure jubilation, saving us from far the financial woe. |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from 2018/19 Season, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of 2018/19 Season and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.