Why is a duck in my podcast? I hear you say.

Well, I need your help.

We live in a water stressed area and this can affect our local environment, even in the winter.

By making small everyday changes, you can save water and money of your bills.

So keep your pipes cosy by fitting pipe lagging, protecting them from freezing, stopping leaks and higher water use.

Find more tips at affinitywater.com.ukukes slash save our streams

Affinity Water, Safe Water, Safe Money and Help Save Our Streams.

Doe! Do! Bumper!

Okay, enough... Do! Bamba! Bampa! Bam, bam, bam!

Okay, enough Rasmataz!

But it's not every day a new scratch card drops.

With the new set for five years scratch card from the National Lottery.

You could win five grand a month, every month for five years.

Pick up yours in store today and get scratching.

Search Dream big, place, mall. Rules, procedures and game-specific rules apply. Place must be 18 or over.

Warning, this podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.

This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased,

organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. This podcast is protected under copyright.

Listener discretion is advised. This is the offensive.

Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about... Do you remember that time that that just stop oil guy tied himself?

He tied himself to a fucking gold post.

A goalpost.

...