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2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 71 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

2 Bears 1 Cave

Society & Culture, Comedy

4.823.2K Ratings

🗓️ 8 March 2021

⏱️ 80 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

SPONSORS: - Head to https://Policygenius.com right now to get started. When it comes to insurance, it’s nice to get it right. - Go to https://www.shipstation.com , click on the microphone at the top of the page, and type in CAVE for a 60-day free trial. - Go to https://BearbottomClothing.com and use code BEARS to get free shipping on your first order Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer talk about Bert's obsession with candy and predictable repeated tooth loss, the unnerving images of "My Feet Are Killing Me," and get inspiration for their secret handshake from a video of Wake Forest football player, Cortez Lewis. They also discuss experiences they had with comedy legend Patrice O'Neal. And finally they call up Justin Martindale to resolve the age old question, "Who's hotter? Bert or Tim Dillon?"

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Can we get Cortez Lewis to create a handshake for us?

0:02.4

That's what we need.

0:03.5

We need to reach out to Cortez and be like,

0:05.0

yo, give us a secret to Bears handshake.

0:07.6

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

0:08.5

It's you on Twitter.

0:09.8

Hey Cortez Lewis, me and Tom Zagora.

0:13.1

Love you.

0:13.9

Love you.

0:14.4

God damn it.

0:15.4

I love you.

0:17.9

I love you.

0:19.9

I love you.

0:20.9

I love you.

0:23.7

Please don't send that.

0:24.7

100%.

0:25.7

Hello and welcome to another episode of Two Bears One Cave.

0:32.9

My name is Bert Kreyser and this?

0:35.2

I'm Tom Zagora.

0:38.4

We want to apologize for last week's episode.

0:40.8

We should have never attached Matt Damon and Ben Affleck to anything you've ever done.

0:44.8

Right.

...

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