Hello and welcome to part four of your mindset reset. Yeah. This one is on controlling your

behaviours. The initial title was responding versus reacting. And I think this is one of the most

important skills that you will learn. This didn't really fit anywhere, so I've just like thrown it in and now there's an extra

day, so bonus, but I think it's so so important to have in.

And it's probably the most profound thing that I learn in therapy.

It is, in my opinion, the biggest life skill.

And I use the word skill because it takes work.

It takes conscious work and conscious effort and you're not just born with disability.

I think so many people assume that mindset traits are innate and that you're born with them and they don't require any work.

Well, they do and you're not born with them.

It takes hard work. It's like building a muscle. You have to repeatedly do it. Building your mental

toolkit is similar to building your muscles. Like you have to put in the practice and actually

if you stop doing the things that helped you build them, they will also atrophy.

So what I want to talk about today is the ability to respond instead of react.

And the distinction that I am making here is that reacting is almost subconscious.

You just do it.

You don't think about it.

You don't use logic. You don't consider options or outcomes.

You just go with your gut or follow your feelings. And this can get us in trouble.

And this is often what causes us to overeat, overdrink or say things in an argument that we didn't

really mean or we didn't want to say. Most of our behaviours,

or most of the behaviours that you want to avoid, stem from reacting to situations or feelings,

...