Ep. 15 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

2 Bears 1 Cave

Society & Culture, Comedy

4.8 • 23.2K Ratings

🗓️ 23 December 2019

⏱️ 73 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Bert Kreischer is burning his mouth on an Uncrustable while Tom Segura laughs. That’s how this episode of 2 Bears 1 Cave begins. The only way to follow that is with a history lesson. Plus, we find out about Tom’s parenting misstep and about what a miracle Bert’s kids are alive and haven’t been taken away. There’s a quick call from Joey Diaz and the Bears reminisce about Bert’s old sex show.

Transcript

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0:10.9	V way
0:18.0	I'm
0:22.0	Wait, let's start off.
0:22.8	They show.
0:23.7	12 years in the making.
0:26.7	It's gonna be a fucking shit show.
0:29.2	I'm gonna put it in my mouth.
0:30.3	It's gonna open, maybe I hate it.
0:32.5	A hundred percent.
0:33.8	A hundred percent.
0:34.8	You all right?
0:38.0	You all right?
0:38.9	I'm wearing my mouth so often, it's ridiculous.
0:40.6	Yeah, this is from an, an incrustable.
0:42.6	I had an incrustable, I put the microwave in it's molten lava.
0:46.0	In the end.
0:46.8	How long do you warm it up for?
0:48.1	In a minute and 30 seconds.
0:49.5	You, that's a really, why didn't, why wouldn't you do like 15 seconds?
0:59.2	Why is it that your, what's hot for your fingers isn't hot to your tongue sometimes.
1:05.4	It'll burn your fingers and it'll be like, that's okay.
1:08.2	Yeah, yeah, yeah.
	...

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