I'm Natalie Lou and you're listening to the baggage reclaim sessions.

Hello hello hello hello hello.

How are you doing?

So over the last few episodes, I've got into some pretty deep topics.

So I've talked about forgiveness, there was the lean period and how that is

behind a cycle of obsessing. And last week I talked about lies.

Over these few weeks I've heard from quite a few people who do that sort of yeah but no but yeah thing so yes they have lied to me a lot but

maybe it's just because like they're just so embarrassed about whatever the lies even if the lies are completely absurd and that totally unnecessary

They're wondering you know maybe it's because they were afraid to tell me maybe it's because they were afraid to tell me, maybe it's because they were

shy, maybe it's because they were shy, maybe it's because they had a difficult time in their

previous relationships, or yes, they are not the person they portrayed themselves to be but you know

maybe if I just give it enough time, they will see how supportive and love and I am, how they don't need to be so afraid how they can you know relax and be themselves.

Oh yeah okay I know I'm not particularly happy in this relationship or situation but you know they've had a

lot going on so like that's why they're treated me badly you know that's why they're not

able to give me what I need and want so you know ipso facto when

the situation improved when when a circumstances improve when they're feeling better

about themselves and they will treat me better.

So many people think that these instances are examples of how empathetic they are.

And it's not that they are not empathetic,

but actually what they're doing,

what they're engaging in is over empathy.

And over empathy is why we get ourselves into a lot of problems.

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