I'm Natalie Lou and you're listening to the baggage reclaim sessions.

Hello hello how are you doing?

You might recall that only one this year Hello, how are you doing?

You might recall that earlier on this year, M&I watched a couple of really good series on Netflix,

you and Dirty Jean. Without giving any spoilers away, you tells the story of

Bookstore manager Joe who falls in love with customer Beck and quickly becomes

obsessed with her.

Like, as in, they're going out together in a relationship

and she doesn't realize that he's stalking her.

Dirty John is based on the true crime series of the same name by the LA Times.

It did a brilliant podcast which is also where to listen.

And it tells the story of Deborah Newell, a wealthy but lonely California businesswoman who falls for the lives and manipulation of

sociopath and scammer John Mehan after connecting with him on a dating site. Now these series are both extreme examples of

lies and deception, but I've also heard from so many people who feel deceived

whether it's because they discovered that their partner who up until that point

they held in high esteem has lied on their CV or because they've been routinely

lied to and manipulated. When we're contemplating or planning a future with someone

discovering truth gaps can understandably send us into a tail spin. More than a

decade ago I coined the term future faking, which is when someone intentionally or not,

and that's more of an issue of how distance they are from their actions,

amps up the future to get what they want in the present.

This is a huge source of pain and confusion for so many.

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