I'm Natalie Lou and you're listening to the baggage reclaim sessions.

Hello, how are you doing?

That's funny, but this week I have been chatting to my eldest. She is 11, but she will be 12 in about three weeks time. And she is already in secondary school because here in England you start at 11,

which I always think is crazy, I think just because I started at 13 back home in Dublin.

Anyway, what's interesting is, unlike when I was 11, 11 year olds these days

certainly here anyway, are already like getting into relationships, just for clarification,

not my daughter, but she's talking about how at school there's all this kind of talk of,

oh this one's in a relationship or this one broke up with that one.

And she finds it quite amusing, one, because she's not interested in doing that yet.

And two, because of the drama that surrounds a lot of it and how many of the people's

get so energized by it and they want to be involved in what's going on they want to know

all the

tip bits of gossip, but also just already how many of them torture themselves

over the end of some of these relationships. Now in my day today I hear from people who are

struggling with the end of a relationship.

So it may be that they are struggling to end the relationship that they're in.

They are struggling post-breakup.

And for some, they've gotten into that territory where they feel as if they are

obsessing and ruminating about the breakup and one of the things that I noticed

a few years back was that a lot of really what the issue is here with

breakups is that we think we should know instinctively how to break up

and that we should be equipped to handle it,

...