Edible Arraignments

Judge John Hodgman

Jesse Thorn

Judge, Information, Show, Comedy, Justice, Kids & Family, Society & Culture, John Hodgman, Pc, Relationships, Jesse Thorn, John Hodgeman, More, Knowledge, Mac, World

4.8 • 7.9K Ratings

🗓️ 11 July 2018

⏱️ 53 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Judge John Hodgman is away from the court on this week's episode. Bailiff Jesse Thorn is taking over judging duties, with friend of the court Jordan Morris serving as bailiff! Jennie brings the case against her husband, John. John has received a lot of gag gifts over the years that happen to be food items. He is currently storing all of them in the fridge. Jennie wants him to get rid of the gifted food but John is too sentimental! Thank you to Jason Jackman for suggesting this week's case! To suggest a title for a future episode, like Judge John Hodgman on Facebook. We regularly put out a call for submissions.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman Podcast.
0:04.8	I'm Baylif Jordan Morris sitting in for Jesse Thorn.
0:08.4	This week, edible arrangements.
0:11.4	Jenny brings the case against her husband, John.
0:14.4	John has received a lot of gag gifts over the years that happen to be food items.
0:19.4	He is currently storing all of them in the fridge.
0:23.0	Jenny wants him to get rid of the gifted food, but John is too sentimental.
0:27.6	Who's right?
0:28.6	Who's wrong?
0:29.6	Only one man can decide.
0:31.9	Please rise as Judge Jesse Thorn enters the courtroom and presents an obscure cultural
0:37.2	reference.
0:38.2	There's a thousand pounds of law, a thousand two hundred pounds of righteousness and integrity.
0:45.2	There's three hundred pounds of due process.
0:48.0	There's precedent down there.
0:50.0	I'll tell you.
0:51.0	I'll probably never need any of this justice, but I can sleep so much better knowing that
0:56.8	it's down there.
0:58.6	Please rise and raise your right hands.
1:00.9	Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you
1:05.3	God or just like the universe or whatever?
1:10.2	Yes.
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Jesse Thorn, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Jesse Thorn and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.