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On Purpose with Jay Shetty

Dr. Ramani ON: How to Spot a Narcissist & 3 Signs of Gaslighting in Any Relationship

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

iHeartPodcasts

Health & Fitness, Business, Mental Health

4.828.5K Ratings

🗓️ 12 December 2022

⏱️ 76 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Today, I am talking to Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a licensed clinical psychologist in Los Angeles, CA, Professor Emerita of Psychology at California State University, Los Angeles, and the Founder and CEO of LUNA Education, Training & Consulting. She is an author of several books including Should I Stay or Should I Go: Surviving A Relationship with a Narcissist, and “Don’t You Know Who I Am?”: How to Stay Sane in an Era of Narcissism, Entitlement, and Incivility. The focus of Dr. Durvasula’s clinical, academic and consultative work is the etiology and impact of narcissism and high-conflict, entitled, antagonistic personality styles on human relationships, mental health, and societal expectations.

Transcript

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0:00.0

So the way gaslighting works is, it's a denial of a person's reality. That's step one. I never said that. That never happened.

0:08.4

Now you're already a little off balance because I'm very authoritatively saying something didn't happen. That by itself is not gaslighting.

0:15.0

Now the step two of gaslighting is, then I tell you there's something wrong with you. Do you know what I'm sick of?

0:20.4

I'm sick of living with an unhinged paranoid lunatic. That's what I'm tired of. There's the gaslight. Now there's a step three.

0:34.2

Hey everyone, welcome back to on purpose the number one health podcast in the world. Thanks to each and every one of you

0:40.4

who choose to come here to become happier, healthier and more healed. And I'm so grateful to our incredible audience.

0:46.8

It's been phenomenal to see how much you've been listening, learning, applying in your lives over the past few months.

0:54.6

I love seeing the reviews. I love seeing all the tags on Instagram and on Twitter and the videos on TikTok.

1:00.3

It means the world to me that you're also sharing and passing this forward.

1:04.3

And today's guest is someone that I've known for a couple of years. We've interacted in some really interesting environments.

1:10.3

And I have to say that whenever she speaks, I'm like, wow, like I'm completely an or her insights are phenomenal.

1:20.2

In real time, I've been part of like almost group thinks. And whenever today's guest shares an insight or shares some wisdom or shares a perspective,

1:31.1

it's so powerful that you know that there's years of experience. There's decades of learning that go behind it.

1:38.4

And so I feel really honored that I get to have this conversation. She's been on the show once before,

1:42.7

but we were just talking beforehand about how it was during the pandemic.

1:46.2

So that was very pandemic focused. But I think today is going to be really truly powerful for you.

1:51.5

I'm speaking about the one and only Dr. Romani, who's a licensed clinical psychologist in LA,

1:58.0

a professor at California State University LA, and the founder and CEO of Luna Education, training and consulting.

2:06.4

Dr. Romani is an author of several books. I recommend them all, including should I stay or should I go surviving a relationship with a narcissist.

2:14.9

And don't you know who I am? How to stay sane in an era of narcissism and entitlement and incivility.

2:24.0

Now Dr. Romani will be adding the role of host to a resume. She launches a new podcast,

2:28.8

navigating narcissism with Dr. Romani, a show that focuses on narcissism at its impact on relationships.

...

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