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93X Half-Assed Morning Show

("Best Of"): Frozen Puke, Bruised Coccyx

93X Half-Assed Morning Show

93X | Cumulus Media Minneapolis | KXXR-FM

News, Comedy, Comedy Interviews, Music, Sports News

4.7972 Ratings

🗓️ 16 February 2026

⏱️ 145 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

The Best of the Half-Assed Morning Show. 

Listen & subscribe to the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or Amazon Music. For more, visit https://www.93x.com/half-assed-morning-show/
Follow the Half-Assed Morning Show:
Twitter/X: @93XHAMS
Facebook: @93XHAMS
Instagram: @93XHAMS
Email the show: HAMS93X@gmail.com 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hey, it's Dana from 93X.

0:01.9

Sports junkie, wing lover, and of course a smart club member because I trust my home comfort to standard heating and air conditioning.

0:08.6

Right now is HVAC mania, and these deals will help offset the cost when your brackets get busted.

0:13.5

You can score a $45 coupon on a furnace tune-up normally $148.

0:18.2

And if your system is about to crash out like a 5-seat against a 12,

0:21.5

now is the time to replace it on your schedule with 0% financing from standard heating

0:25.9

and air conditioning.

0:26.9

Go to standardheating.com and mention 93x.

0:29.6

Standard, providing the comfort you deserve since 1930.

0:33.5

The half-assed morning show backtracks.

0:54.7

It's Monday. It's early. You're a hell of a crowd. Appreciate you hanging out with us. We've made our way all the way up to 831. I mean, come on. It's Monday. I wanted nothing to do with this. I think it's gone by really fast. Yeah, I think it has, Cubby.

0:56.2

Kind of weirdly fast, actually.

0:57.8

It's been a little weird.

0:58.8

It's been a little fast. Why has it been going so fast?

1:01.4

Before we completely move on from the topic of owning a ferret, the text messages keep rolling in.

1:09.3

We were talking about ferret legging is a sport in England

1:13.3

where you've got to take off your underwear and you put your pants back on

1:17.2

and you tie the legs at the bottom of your pants and you drop two, three ferrets down your trousers.

1:23.2

And you see how long you can last with those sum bitches scrambling around,

1:26.9

biting you all over the, whatever they do, right?

1:29.7

We're still getting text messages from ferret owners.

1:33.0

One dude lost a nipple.

...

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