Ass Cactus
93X Half-Assed Morning Show
93X | Cumulus Media Minneapolis | KXXR-FM
4.7 • 972 Ratings
🗓️ 13 February 2026
⏱️ 150 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Originally Aired February 13, 2026: They yell, they scream, they throw up on the floor. Rewriting history. Everything you wanna know about your baby daddy banging your sister.
Listen & subscribe to the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or Amazon Music. For more, visit https://www.93x.com/half-assed-morning-show/
Follow the Half-Assed Morning Show:
Twitter/X: @93XHAMS
Facebook: @93XHAMS
Instagram: @93XHAMS
Email the show: HAMS93X@gmail.com
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Happy New Year podcast, pals. |
| 0:01.9 | Dana here to give my daily love to everybody at Standard Heating and Air Conditioning. Just a quick brag. I'm a smart club member. And yeah, it's a big deal because when the polar vortex hits, your house will let you know real fast. That's why right now is honestly the best time to do comfort upgrades. Standards running a ton of specials right now. Things like Whole Home humidifiers to fix that dry winter air uv lights to help keep the air cleaner and ervs that bring in that fresh air without dumping the heat trust me you will notice the difference in a big way be cozy this winter standard heating and air conditioning providing the comfort you deserve since 193030 online at standard heating.com. |
| 0:38.5 | The 93x half-ass morning show. |
| 0:42.3 | Ninety-three air. |
| 0:47.8 | I always love this bit. |
| 0:49.9 | Is my computer not up? |
| 0:51.4 | No, it's up. |
| 0:52.8 | Well, no, shush, shh, shh. |
| 0:54.6 | What the heck? |
| 0:55.6 | No, no sound until you get it going. |
| 0:57.7 | Oh, I don't like this. |
| 1:00.0 | Now, see, now you're whining. |
| 1:01.5 | I know. |
| 1:03.4 | Is that my computer? |
| 1:05.1 | Keep going. |
| 1:06.6 | All right, fine. |
| 1:07.7 | I don't think I can get this to work. |
| 1:45.6 | Crap. Well, that's unfortunate. Friday the 13th, you know it's Friday the 13th? Hey, guys, I can't believe you're on the air today. I mean, you could spill your coffee. You could. I friggin't love it. I'm sorry. That caller. I know you probably put a lot of work into that. I did. No need to apologize. No need to explain. I love that. Here we go. Nowhere, Bitt. I love it. Every time, it works every time. What sucks the most is I test this every morning before we go on, every single morning, and it was working just fine. I'm going to restart my computer. and then we're going to restart the show we're going to go back in time okay and this never happened |
| 1:50.3 | this is where we close things out for the week cubby and oh am i ready to put a lid on this bitch |
| 1:58.0 | yeah i'm tired this week yeah uh we got a text earlier how's everybody? And I mentioned it's very tired in the studio this morning. I'm ready to put a lid on it. I am. Welcome to the program. 93X half-ass morning show. I have a plan in place for us. You guys are feeling kind of tired. I got this. |
| 2:17.7 | We start off with a little bit of this. |
| 2:19.5 | We follow with a little bit of that. |
... |
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