You're listening to On Attachment, a place to learn about how attachment shapes the way we experience relationships

and where you'll gain the guidance, knowledge and practical tools to overcome insecurity and build healthy, thriving relationships.

I'm your host, relationship coach Stephanie Rigg,

and I'm really glad you're here.

Hey everybody, welcome back to another episode of On Attachment. Today's episode is a Q&A episode

and I'm answering the question, how to discuss moving in together with an avoidant

partner. So this is a question that I got via my Instagram stories last week. And I think it's

going to be a really useful discussion, not only for people who are in that specific situation,

there may be some listening, but it's going to illustrate a broader technique or approach that

you can take in broaching those maybe sensitive discussions, maybe things that feel

intimidating, that feel anxiety-inducing. If you're wanting to discuss, you know, taking next

steps in a relationship, having any sort of,

where is this going, what are we conversation with a partner who does lean towards avoidant

attachment and so might have some resistance to those conversations. So that's what we're going

to be talking about today. I'm going to offer you some reframes on how to do the work behind the scenes

for yourself going into that so that you're not in this really constricted state of anxiety and

worry and overthinking and trying to be perfect in the way that you discuss that, because I think

that's the tendency. And I'll also give you some really practical tools and strategies in terms of the how-to

of having that conversation, of starting it, of actually going about navigating those

discussions, depending on where it goes.

So depending on their response, how you can respond to that to really optimize your chances

of not necessarily getting an outcome. I'm not going to tell you strategically how to broach

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