#3719 Yes, Mayhem

TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

TBTL

Comedy, Leisure

4.8 • 2.4K Ratings

🗓️ 4 July 2022

⏱️ 44 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Luke's attempts to get his hands on a lawnmower continue throughout the show, as he receives many updates and mixed messages from hardware stores around the Pacific Northwest. Plus, the internet is desperately trying to find the woman who won almost all the cooking prizes at a Virginia-Kentucky district fair.

Transcript

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0:00.0	I see you got them snakes and sparklers, but...
0:03.1	What's good stuff, man? Good stuff.
0:06.0	This is the good stuff. Snakes and sparklers.
0:09.0	Are you nuts, dude?
0:10.0	You need stuff to explode! Go boom!
0:12.0	Why is that good?
0:14.0	So you're gonna tell me that you don't have no black cats?
0:17.0	No Roman candles or screaming memes?
0:19.0	No.
0:20.0	Oh, come on, man.
0:21.0	You don't got no lady fingers, buzz-buttles, sneaker-bombs, church burners,
0:24.0	gut busters, zippity-do-dots, or craft flappers?
0:26.0	No, I don't.
0:28.0	You're gonna stand there owning a fireworks stand and tell me you don't have no
0:33.0	whistling bungholes, no splines, blitters, whisker biscuits, honky lighters,
0:37.0	whosker dudes, whosker don'ts, cherubombs, nips and daisers,
0:41.0	whether without the scooter stick, or one single whistling kitty chaser?
0:46.0	No. Snakes and sparklers are the only ones I like.
0:50.0	T-B-T-L!
0:53.0	Who may hot dogs you have for lunch?
0:57.0	Three.
0:58.0	Well, there's your problem.
	...

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