371: Every Nut I Spit Out (ICE CREAM)
Stiff Socks
Trevor Wallace and Michael Blaustein | Audioboom Studios
4.9 • 7.5K Ratings
🗓️ 25 February 2026
⏱️ 74 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
The boys spiral from suburban warfare over dog poop in a trash can into a full-blown midlife crisis fantasy involving green Lambos and unhinged license plates like “ID8 MOMS.” Along the way they debate spandex bike culture, Netflix turning vertical, cruise ship disappearances, and why LA ice cream flavors need to calm down. It all ends in with restaurant birthday rants, Sock Talk conspiracies, and one very committed stance on eating around the nuts.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | You got love nuts. |
| 0:01.3 | Yep. |
| 0:01.7 | And so what is it? |
| 0:03.0 | I ate around it. |
| 0:03.7 | It was disgusting. |
| 0:05.8 | What do you mean you ate around? I didn't. Every nut I got in my mouth, I spit it out. You're the straightest man in America. Are we in? Are we in? This is something petty and I don't know. Should I be beefing with this person? because I don't think I should, but like, it sparked the reaction to me. |
| 0:22.2 | Uh-oh. |
| 0:23.1 | I got to throw up my trash this morning. Okay. Open the trash can because the trash cans are just on the street. Yep. Multiple poop bags in there. People are dropping their dog shit in my trash can, which is interesting because it is a trash can. That's what trash is for. |
| 0:38.7 | I don't want your dog shit in my trash can. Let me ask you this, though. Is the shit bags in your |
| 0:43.8 | trash can prior to the trash people picking the trash up? Or do they just pick it up? So it's a |
| 0:49.0 | fresh, empty trash can and now there's shit bags in your empty trash can. Fresh, empty at the bottom, green shit bags. |
| 0:55.8 | So as a dog owner, who cares? |
| 0:58.1 | As a human being, this is empty now. |
| 1:01.3 | Fuck you take your own shit. |
| 1:04.6 | Does that make sense? |
| 1:06.7 | It's so interesting because two days ago, |
| 1:09.1 | I got frozen yogurt and threw in somebody else's trash. |
| 1:12.0 | Hmm. |
| 1:12.5 | But theirs was full. |
| 1:14.3 | There's something about opening and you see stamen hot shit at the bottom. |
| 1:17.5 | I hear you. |
| 1:18.1 | And it's not your dog shit. |
... |
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